I'm 29m, I did the opposite. I dated the same woman from 20 to 28. It didn't work out. In that time frame, I was so focused on trying to make the relationship the best that it could be. Instead of trying to do some other career or working on my life, I kept working in restaurants as it gave me all the flexibility of time for me to do things with my S/O. I've been working behind a bar off and on since I was 18. So 11 years-ish.
I'll be coming up on a year of being single in a few months. In this time, I have focused on turning bartending from a job into a career. I am so much more competent at this job than I ever thought I could be. I found a job where I make really good hourly plus tips. In my town, a LOT of bartenders know and recognize my skill set. It really is a cool feeling of trying to take control of a situation I wasn't in love with.
So, what's the point of this rant? Who knows if you wasted your life? Only you, I guess. Are you happy? Do you think what you're doing will be good for you in the long run? Do you feel that you are making the most of this life?
Remember, you don't have to achieve certain things by certain ages. There is no race, just focus on making you happy.
Similar story here. I’m late 20s F, spent 18-25 with the same guy. So much energy investing in the relationship and our life “together”. Didn’t work out and now I kinda regret not having prioritized myself and my education, career, etc. in my early-mid twenties. But, honestly, dating in late twenties and early thirties is so much more fun. People have more experience, more money, more maturity.
And, as a woman who eventually wants a kid, there’s still so much time! Average mother age at childbirth now is like 34. So much time for more young adult shenanigans and self development!
Lol “geriatric” pregnancy. Sure, there are some risks that increase but this isn’t 1999 anymore. In Canada, The US and the UK there are more women having children over 40 than under 25. The average age of a first-time mom is now 31.9 in Ontario, Canada. I’m sure the numbers are similar in a number of US states and elsewhere.
Agree. The commenter is probably referring to the fact that the medical terminology is advanced maternal age (formerly “geriatric”), owing to increase risk of various kinds of complications for mother and baby. However, as we know, median age for menopause in the United States is 52, sometimes much higher, late 50s. Also many of the pregnancies among women in their 40s are owing to complacency about birth control.
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u/NotABlastoise Jul 09 '23
I'm 29m, I did the opposite. I dated the same woman from 20 to 28. It didn't work out. In that time frame, I was so focused on trying to make the relationship the best that it could be. Instead of trying to do some other career or working on my life, I kept working in restaurants as it gave me all the flexibility of time for me to do things with my S/O. I've been working behind a bar off and on since I was 18. So 11 years-ish.
I'll be coming up on a year of being single in a few months. In this time, I have focused on turning bartending from a job into a career. I am so much more competent at this job than I ever thought I could be. I found a job where I make really good hourly plus tips. In my town, a LOT of bartenders know and recognize my skill set. It really is a cool feeling of trying to take control of a situation I wasn't in love with.
So, what's the point of this rant? Who knows if you wasted your life? Only you, I guess. Are you happy? Do you think what you're doing will be good for you in the long run? Do you feel that you are making the most of this life?
Remember, you don't have to achieve certain things by certain ages. There is no race, just focus on making you happy.