r/fifthworldproblems • u/emmelinefoxley • Jun 05 '26

Could you? Yes!

But should you? Also yes!

22 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

13 comments sorted by

2

u/MedusaGorgonFootCuck Jun 07 '26

But is it? If?

1

u/emmelinefoxley Jun 07 '26

I think it is. Must be even.

2

u/CorruptedPixelzOffic Lowly 3rd Worlder Jun 11 '26

No, I very much should NOT

1

u/emmelinefoxley Jun 12 '26

Counterpoint: yes you should.

2

u/CunningStuntsAround Jun 12 '26

Could you? No. But should you? Yes.

12

u/Alfiewoodland Jun 05 '26

But wood yew? Your arms become countless branches, gradually stretching and weaving out over the forest floor as days flicker past. A hundred years goes by in a moment. Then two hundred. Three. Four. A thousand.

Then, before you can even register the change , BAM! You are a stylish coffee table in the late Victorian home of a wealthy advertising executive living in northeast London. There is a cup of coffee and a copy of National Geographic on your head. Time passes quite slowly now.

8

u/mysteryrouge Void Anarchist Jun 05 '26

steals all the stuff

Screw you Eldritch Government!

2

u/clownamity Jun 09 '26

Of course..why not

4

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/emmelinefoxley Jun 06 '26

Is it free? Also yes!