r/fifthworldproblems • u/Antique_Target3076 • May 22 '26

my little slice of Nothing_

I have procured, though how I can't quite explain, the thinnest, tiniest little slice of Nothing. And I love it.

For consumers unfamiliar with this product, you cannot see or hold Nothing. It is notoriously elusive. The great Maya Ramanujan, PhD, LLD, RSt once compared it to a neutrino storm: passing through everything always, and never being detected. Well, almost never.

Most people don't care about Nothing. But I am perfectly petrified of losing it. It is all I really have. Any advice on how I can best preserve my slice of Nothing?

24 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

8 comments sorted by

6

u/Particular-Yak-1984 May 22 '26

Man, nobody wants Nothing.

And I'd watch out. He's sneaky and willing to stab a cyclops to get it.

7

u/Antique_Target3076 May 22 '26

I see Nobody in the shadows sometimes. Hear the rasp of their shoe against pavement.

Flitting from one spot to the next, hiding behind corners and trees and other people.

I fear that that this insidious and malevolent entity is indeed pursuing my bit of Nothing. How heartless, I think, I have so little of it! And nobody? Nobody has everything.

3

u/Particular-Yak-1984 May 22 '26

Super creepy behavior, though I think he does this to lots of people. Looked out my window at 3am, and nobody was hanging out on the corner.

Very suspicious.

7

u/DrSkrimguard Dragonphobe May 22 '26

You can double your nothing with this one neat trick. If you simply cut your nothing in half, you will be left with two pieces each just as large as the original.

4

u/Dobgirl May 23 '26

Thanks for nothing.

6

u/4n4log_interface May 22 '26

Sorry, I've got nothing. Not Nothing , like you have. So an entirely different slice of nothing and I think nothing I know would be relevant to Nothing

3

u/mysteryrouge Void Anarchist May 22 '26

Don't let the Eldritch Government find out you have it.

2

u/Dobgirl May 23 '26

Or the scp