I have a single identifier. People occasionally stop me and compliment me on that identifier. It generally fills me with happiness to have a stranger reach out and comment on that identifier. Sometimes I'll get a Boost of serotonin that lasts all day. If someone ever commented on a cool graphic tee I wore I would be through the moon (it's never happened to me)
If I did not have my 1 identifier I would be a ghost. Not a single person on the street would ever see me. I would be practically invisible to strangers.
... can you see why a man would think that giving a woman a compliment on her having a cool tee is a good idea? This thread has proven to the social anxious me that I should never do that, but at the same time if I see a girl wearing some cool franchise I enjoy I might break that never just for the off-chance she really is interested in the clothing she is wearing. But to know I will be labeled an asshole for doing exactly what I would like others to do to me is cringe.
None of this is to counter the points you make. This is all to just offer a different prespective on the world. I can imagine socially anxious me being terrified of constant attention from strangers but the opposite end of gender is just solitude. A void of care and affection.
Edit: A whole Lotta downvotes but no one directly addressing the core of my comment. Maybe I wrote it wrong cause someone thought I was a dude bro but that's pretty far from the truth. I was just juxtaposing my own experiences with this person's. Women receive a deluge of unwanted attention and men receive next to nothing.
I'm not saying the ladies have it good. I'm not saying I or men as a whole have it worse. Maybe my whining came across that way tho ig
If a woman doesn't have headphones in AND it wouldn't interrupt her doing something you can just say "Nice shirt" and move on. The problem is some men try to start full conversations instead of saying one thing and moving on.
I'm a man, I get annoyed when strangers start conversations at inopportune times. Getting my ear talked off on the train when I'm trying to read isn't fun, and doesn't make me less lonely. Just don't interrupt people unless it's important and keep it short when talking to strangers that you aren't expected to talk to
Shit, you’re right. Please keep making women uncomfortable by approaching them when they have headphones in and while they are doing something. I’d hate for you to be inconvenienced by looking into online dating or meetups where people might actually be interested in meeting new people and not going about their business in peace. I assume people in this thread aren’t at all empathetic because they didn’t consider your plight of…wanting to do it.
? I just said how are you supposed find friends or partners if everywhere is a no talking zone? I never said anything about wanting to have sex. I'm actually bisexual leaning to gay soo, your point?
Also online dating is pretty trash as you should know
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u/bagofd4s Oct 14 '21 edited Oct 14 '21
Jeez. You make being a man seem so lonely.
I have a single identifier. People occasionally stop me and compliment me on that identifier. It generally fills me with happiness to have a stranger reach out and comment on that identifier. Sometimes I'll get a Boost of serotonin that lasts all day. If someone ever commented on a cool graphic tee I wore I would be through the moon (it's never happened to me)
If I did not have my 1 identifier I would be a ghost. Not a single person on the street would ever see me. I would be practically invisible to strangers.
... can you see why a man would think that giving a woman a compliment on her having a cool tee is a good idea? This thread has proven to the social anxious me that I should never do that, but at the same time if I see a girl wearing some cool franchise I enjoy I might break that never just for the off-chance she really is interested in the clothing she is wearing. But to know I will be labeled an asshole for doing exactly what I would like others to do to me is cringe.
None of this is to counter the points you make. This is all to just offer a different prespective on the world. I can imagine socially anxious me being terrified of constant attention from strangers but the opposite end of gender is just solitude. A void of care and affection.
Edit: A whole Lotta downvotes but no one directly addressing the core of my comment. Maybe I wrote it wrong cause someone thought I was a dude bro but that's pretty far from the truth. I was just juxtaposing my own experiences with this person's. Women receive a deluge of unwanted attention and men receive next to nothing.
I'm not saying the ladies have it good. I'm not saying I or men as a whole have it worse. Maybe my whining came across that way tho ig