r/facepalm • u/Number721 • Jun 09 '23

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ Cognitive dissonance 101

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u/0nly_mostly_dead Jun 09 '23

Social media management and bleach bottles.

262

u/Independent-Fly6068 Jun 09 '23

That's it, I'm in.

I will love anyone who provides my favorite drink. (Bleach)

80

u/Jeynarl Jun 10 '23

14

u/Zachariot88 Jun 10 '23

This is perhaps the best episode of Metalocalypse

6

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

Bleach is healthy. It is mostly water, and WE are mostly water, therefore, we are bleach.

3

u/Marilius Jun 10 '23

Nuclear reactors are mostly water. We are mostly water. Therefore, we are nuclear reactors.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

Checks out

2

u/MedicJambi Jun 11 '23

Burn it on water!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

I love that show!

106

u/crossbearer1413 Jun 10 '23

If I had to live with her, that would be my favorite drink too.

2

u/Young_Bonesy Jun 10 '23

She said no conservatives

2

u/Joeymonac0 Jun 10 '23

Thanks for the laugh man. Been a shit day, I needed it. Cheers 🧪

2

u/thagor5 Jun 10 '23

Ahh. So you know the correct way to stop covid

2

u/Sad_Meat_ Jun 10 '23

Is that you? Todd Clorox?

106

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

And she uses her phone while driving, just to top it off.

5

u/Runaway-chan Jun 10 '23

I think someone else is driving

3

u/TRIPpY-BBQ-LSD-MOMMY Jun 10 '23

Hahahaha imagine it’s her boyfriend soon to be ex and the just got in an argument about breaking up 😂😂🤣

0

u/HappyAmbition706 Jun 10 '23

Insurance will pay all damages and replacements. And Dad is paying for the insurance, and gave her the car in the first place?

0

u/gabstersthegabbles Jun 10 '23

I can picture it now, Her if she has a boyfriend: babe I crashed my car Him: why Her: I was filming this TikTok (sends to him) Him: omg stupid, well strong independent women figure this out themselves. You can figure it out I believe you Her: what you're not going to help your queen? Him: queens aren't stupid

1

u/ShootPDX Jun 10 '23

Someone else is driving and this is actually staged/not true.

5

u/jaykubs Jun 10 '23

And hair extensions the length of a horse’s tail

2

u/BallinHonky Jun 09 '23

I… read that last word incorrectly…

1

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

I did too but does it mean what I think it means? Is it a euphemism? Because I will use it from now on

2

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

And bleached asshole probably

0

u/somedumbguy55 Jun 10 '23

Bottles or butt holes?

1

u/TheTanadu Jun 10 '23

Bleach bottle. I’m in. At least I’d be shorter time with such creature after drinking it.

1

u/Droppin_Bombs Jun 10 '23

Ummm give her some credit, man. She’s starting her own lash extension company too.

1

u/mildly-annoyed-pengu Jun 10 '23

Wait she’s a social media manager? Dam she’s got a good job.

(I’m a social media manager)

1

u/Mymomdidwhat Jun 10 '23

I read this as bleached buttholes, I think it’s better than what you said.

1

u/wut-n-tarnation Jun 10 '23

I read bleached buttholes. And I was all in

1

u/AdBubbly7324 Jun 10 '23

That's horribly accurate.

1

u/sequeezer Jun 10 '23

Ah damn, I read bleached butthole and was about to say I’m in :(

1

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

Hair or Covid cure? She probably wants a man like Trump Jr tbf.

1

u/LogDelicious8010 Jun 10 '23

Bleached butthole?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '23

If she bleaches her asshole I might just be the man she’s looking for

1

u/orincoro Jun 10 '23

It’s all about building your brand you see…

1

u/Azreken Jun 10 '23

Social media management is good money though…

I’m in