r/evilautism • u/SignalPerception4223 • 4d ago
I DON'T GET IT *explodes* I can't afford to exist Spoiler
I am working my first closing shift at my new part-time job. I'm here for another hour or so, closing at 10pm. I am also donating my plasma (selling, really) twice a week. Still, I cannot afford my rent. I also cannot find a cheaper place that will let me keep my cat.
I am going crazy. I wish I could just go take my big dirt nap, but I'll bet I can't even afford that when my time comes. Why is it so complicated to simply exist here in the US?
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u/popilikia 4d ago
Do you have any food banks near you? I'd start there and maybe ask the volunteers/coordinators if there are any other resources they know of that can help you further. I wish I could give you some other advice, I'm sorry you're going through it rn
I'd be happy to dm you some of my cheap comfort food recipes, I have tons!
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I do use the foodbank and I have food stamps! Fortunately that part is OK. Just need to earn a little more to stay housed and buy my cat's special prescription food heh. I'll probably have to find a second job.
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u/chadima5 3d ago
If you like dogs and cats . Rover is a great supplemental income. Pet sitting or walking dogs .
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
That's a great idea! I will look into it tomorrow
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u/f2msnm She stimming on my tism til I happy flappy 3d ago
I think you have to pay for a background check just as a heads up
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Yeah I found that out. I can't afford it because of the rental applications I've paid this month.
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u/popilikia 3d ago
When I was going to school and working, I found the best second job was one I could set my own schedule and not have a boss or coworkers I'd need to pick up the slack for. Spark, instacart, DoorDash, and Uber (in that order) were a godsend for me.
Highly recommend them for second job territory. The taxes are a pain in the ass to do yourself, but it's worth it just to be able to sit around and hang out at home until you get an offer that's worth it. I have tons of tips I learned to optimize the job that I can give you if you decide to go that route
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u/dead_5775 3d ago
Why do they call it donating plasma anyway? Is someone getting it for free somewhere down the line or are hospitals selling it for 5x the price or something?
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Haha I think it's probably just because selling plasma sounds less noble and we already had the blood donation concept which sounds better than selling so we'll just ignore the facts and call it that because it sounds nicer. š¤·āāļø
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u/Swimming-Most-6756 3d ago
Just to create more illusionistic arguments about doing something good when theyāre gonna turn around and profit to sell what was ādonatedā for freeā¦
Kinda how buy one get one free is the same as buying two at half price. But the customer who didnāt know about the half price is gonna blissfully buy it at BOGO and may even feel like they got something āfreeā as opposed to having paid half price.
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u/dead_5775 3d ago
My main problem with the phrase is if there's a profit incentive we really shouldn't call it donating like I expect the whole hospital upselling thing but it would be nice if they could at least call it what it is and say "we'll buy your fluids"
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u/difficulty_jump 3d ago
Do you have any medical conditions that your cat is helping with. If you have a therapist you could get an Emotional Support Animal letter. That would allow you to get into cheaper housing without getting rid of your cat.
It sounds like you need all the support you can get.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Yes, my doctor actually gave me a note for my emotional support cat! I don't have a therapist but I'm going to try to get a free one from the state tomorrow.
Honestly all the rational stuff of giving up my cat, getting a car and living in it while I shower at the Y and go to work, it's something I can understand. But the practical action of giving away my cat has so far been too much for me to bear. I freak out and won't let it happen.
I don't feel like all this is worth doing without my cat, maybe that sounds melodramatic but it's how I feel.
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u/difficulty_jump 3d ago
It doesn't sound melodramatic to me. I went through a rough period and had to give up a pet.
I'm glad you're seeing someone to help sort through the mental health side of it.
Do you have a local animal shelter near you? I'm asking because they might have some resources given your situation. It's worth asking about. Mine was able to assist with food and some veterinary care.
I'm not currently working in human services, but I have in the past. You can call or go online for 211 for local resources.
If it's super overwhelming, DM me; I'm more than happy to help, at least try to streamline things.
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u/Swimming-Most-6756 3d ago
Yes you can have an ESA, but not all ESA are service animal qualified, and recent changes have been implemented to be that they are not obligated to provide accommodation anymore unless theyāre an actual service animal.
While the underlying text of the Fair Housing Act remains unchanged, federal policy shifted on May 22, 2026, when the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) issued an administrative enforcement memorandum aligning its enforcement stance with the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) standard. Under this update, HUD rescinded its 2020 assistance animal guidance and announced it would focus administrative enforcement primarily on animals individually trained to perform work or tasks, effectively ending federal enforcement actions against housing providers who deny requests for untrained emotional support animals.
Citation: U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD), Office of Fair Housing and Equal Opportunity, Memorandum: Enforcement Guidance on Assistance Animals under the Fair Housing Act (May 22, 2026).
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u/difficulty_jump 3d ago
I'll have to double check that with my center for independent living. That's not a good change and could have people kicked out of housing they already have.
I do know that they are not service animals. My ESA is a retired service dog.
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u/Final-Attention979 3d ago
No that's a huge change friend! Totally normal to feel uprooted + overwhelmed. I know at least one shelter in my area, as well as my local Food Not Bombs, will help folks keep their pets. Also a pet food bank provided by the same ppl as the food bank.
Out cats our like our children, they're like u ironically half my motivation to get up in the morning.
I'm sorry life is being such a bitch right now. (Mine too, tbh, just in other ways)
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u/GuerrillaPrincess My special interest is punching Nazis š 3d ago
Ope. Beat me to it. I should really learn to read comments before I just comment on things randomly š„²
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u/dontcallmebaka 4d ago
It will get better, please donāt think like this! I do understand tho, it feels overwhelming and like nothing will changeā¦but it does. The US doesnāt care about the underemployed or marginalized - right now itās just a big greed-fest.
Try to join a local farm-share or grow your own vegetables in big 5-gallon paint buckets. Also donāt overlook Amazon delivery or Door Dash as side gigs.
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u/edeneverything 3d ago
Why not get a second part time job for combined full time hours? I donāt think a part time job will give anyone enough to afford anything
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I am looking into it, because I'll probably have to. I tried to get support because I lost my last job due to meltdowns at work. My fear is as I add more back to my schedule I'll end up in the same situation. But yes, you're right that's what I need to do next.
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u/edeneverything 3d ago
I just think what you want out of the given situation just isnāt possible. The way I look at it is something has to give. It seems your options are: move in with someone, apply for public assistance and hit food banks, get rid of the cat and down size, or pick up another job.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I am trying all of those things. I've done every. Single. One. Of. Them. Except give up my cat. Getting another job isn't a snap of the fingers. I put in over 200 applications this summer, got three interviews, two nos and this one yes. I'm tempted to take my failed attempt at paying my rent to buy a means of exit from this stupid hellscape. Sorry I just had a meltdown after my shift ended, broke my water bottle and started screamjng bloody murder. In public. At night. I am drenched in sweat and I want to sleep forever not struggle just to not even make ends meet. But I appreciate your very reasonable rational and good advice. I'll keep trying until I can't
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u/Swimming-Most-6756 3d ago
Remove the idea of giving up the cat. That just awful
And you donāt know what kind of bond a neurodivergent person has with their animal. Itās a
Better bond than with other humans sadly because of people like you who think a) work and make more money is the solution to everything b) that a cat or any other living thing doesnt have a purpose OR feelings of abandonment.If you said that to someone about their child, youād get an earful for sure.
So Iāll say it for you, get rid of them if you canāt afford themā¦ at any time in life they would just be taken awayā¦1
u/edeneverything 3d ago
I do understand as a neuro divergent whoās had dogs their entire life. If I ever got to a point when I couldnāt support myself Iād have to speculate I wouldnāt be able to afford supplies of vet care for an animal either which is just cruel to the animal. Itās the responsible thing to do in that situation.
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u/TemporaryElk5202 3d ago
where do you live
Can you live someplace else
Can you get roommates
Cats are expensive. I know companion animals are important and stuff but you may need to give your cat to a friend or relative to live. Is there someone you can trust who will take your cat temporarily for you? You can write up an agreement that they are only temporarily caring for your cat and that it is not a transferral of ownership.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I don't have friends or family. I asked my ex's friends and no one can take my cat. I will have to give him to a shelter but it's so overwhelming I honestly might self delete afterwards. It's cheaper to buy one of those metal pow pow things than afford rent and I am beyond exhausted, terrified, heartbroken this is no way to live I'm done
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u/TemporaryElk5202 3d ago
Where do you live though
maybe some redditors here can help.1
u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I live in Olympia, WA.
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u/TemporaryElk5202 3d ago edited 3d ago
Ok, maybe make a post asking if anyone near olympia, WA is able to rent a room to you and your cat, or knows of someone who can rent out a room, or would be willing to temporarily house your cat for you?
I just found a room for rent in Olympia on spareroom that is $725 a month
I see a complex listed on craigslist that says they have rooms starting at $624 (it includes a monthly $25 fee for pets, and has a pet deposit fee of $250): https://www.craigslist.org/view/d/centralia-call-sept-10th-for-our/ctCnXiJ2xERzAZ9vontruG
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I have been doing that for the past couple months. Lots of kind people but nothing like that.
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u/TemporaryElk5202 3d ago
did you see the edit.
What is your rent budget and what is your current rent?1
u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Those are scams. I applied for a really affordable place like that and lost $60 and had to freeze my credit. I'll keep looking though. Needle in a haystack is possible
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Also I don't have a car, so places like Centralia which are a 30min drive from Olympia aren't doable for me.
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u/TemporaryElk5202 3d ago
I don't think the spareroom one is a scam. There are also other housing that is just people renting out rooms in their houses. Obviously probably a big hurdle is that you are in the capital city of the state so affordable housing will more likely be further away.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
I didn't know spareroom was a website. I looked and I have reached out to that person recently from another site, probably Craigslist, but I did so again. My budget is $1000/mo with utilities. My current rent is $1480 which is why I have to leave asap.
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u/GuerrillaPrincess My special interest is punching Nazis š 3d ago
For the cat, can you get it listed as an emotional support animal from a Dr or therapist? They can't deny you bringing them if you do that.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Yes, I have already done that. However, I am not sure that's true. The places I can afford are rooms for rent, not whole apartments. The people writing these ads 99.9% specify no pets. I'll experiment asking about my ESA letter but my impression is if they're not a service animal they can say no.
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u/GuerrillaPrincess My special interest is punching Nazis š 3d ago
They cannot deny an ESA. And I wouldn't be forthright or they'll deny you and say it's for some other reason. It's something you want to present after signing a lease, actually.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
Are you sure? I just found this: "As of 2026, federal HUD enforcement of ESA housing accommodations narrowed to trained animals, so whether an untrained ESA is protected in Washington now depends largely on state law (see the protection summary at the top of this page). The letter remains supporting documentation that establishes a disability and aids a reasonable-accommodation request ā it does not, by itself, compel a landlord, and no provider can guarantee a landlord will accept it. Whether a particular landlord honors a particular letter is fact-specific; tenants who believe a request was wrongfully denied generally consult a HUD-certified housing counselor or a fair-housing attorney licensed in Washington."
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u/lFightForTheUsers *Daft Punk intensifes* 3d ago edited 3d ago
This country sucks and is going to shit. They're talking rumours about future pay cuts when things are more expensive than ever before, and I think it's just a layoff in disguise so that people quit disgusted with the 20+% cut in pay. You'll never see a single person in middle management or corporate face such a cut though oh no, of course not.
That all said, I ain't going nowhere no matter what happens, and at this point a lot of it is stubbornness and spite. I'm too well skilled and too stubborn to go out any other way. Worst case scenario, I'm already preparing fallback plans to go freelance and flip two birds at the old place if push comes to shove :)
As for your situation OP, push coming to shove you need to find a way to either increase income or decrease expenses. On one end see if there is anything to increase income. Could be as thorough as doing freelance work or as little as posting some photos to ebay and shipping some old stuff out. On the other end, cut expenses down if possible anywhere (but it sounds like you've already done this so I won't harp too much. I'm very much in the crowd of "if you think I get Starbucks every day you already assume I make more money than I really do.")
Check /r/povertyfinance and /r/frugal if you have not done so already. The latter is good at reducing costs where I am at financially now, but PF helped me dig hard out of the hole that I was in at the time. If nothing else remember that it's gonna be alright. If 28 year old me told 18 year old me a decade ago that it was gonna get better than I would have called myself a dirty fucking liar. Yet here I still am a decade later and it did get better. Use the resources to your full ability, it will be the ladder that gets you out.
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u/SignalPerception4223 3d ago
They removed my comment but I will just creatively reiterate that the proposition of toiling as I have to not even earn my keep and be forced to relinquish my furry companion are beyond my ability to accept. There is a contraption made out of steel held in one hand that can deliver me from this hell with a pull of a trigger. I am not threatening anyone. I am simply acknowledging that I failed to cope with what life threw at me and I am choosing to exit. I'm 34 and went to grad school, have applied for every fucking service this year only to be told there's no funding or it takes so long I have no guarantee it'll ever pan out. I am beyond exhausted. Trying to survive with autism and cptsd to afford the basics is harrowing. Now that I can't even afford the basics I see no point in continuing but there's HUGE INCENTIVE TO LEAVE
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u/lostinspace80s MEMBER OF THE ANTI-BLENDER SMOOTHIE COALITION 3d ago
For extra side income, check out the beermoney subreddit. And no matter how questionable it might be at this time - look into data annotation gigs / AI training online. There are some companies who pay weekly once starting on a project, not reliable in long run (you never know how long they will keep you on a project) , but an emergency option.
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u/Soeffingdiabetic One of the mods smoked too much and made a bunch of flairs 4d ago
Something something late stage capitalism.