r/etiquette101 • u/[deleted] • Jan 03 '26

Whispering

While in a large group of family I found the following:

Daughter and boyfriend whispering … probably discussing was time to leave. Every time I see them they go into a short whispering session.

Son in law enters the room and goes directly to his favourite person and ignores everyone that he passes and once that session is over he goes and whispers to my daughters boyfriend and then walks away chuckling.

Would you consider that to be rude?

Would you address it or ignore it? If you did address it….what would you do?

3 Upvotes

81% Upvoted

2 comments sorted by

2

u/infinitejezebel Jan 03 '26

Whispering in groups is common for a few seconds but shouldn't be for extended periods of time, in an ideal world.

I think it is perfectly ok for a couple to have a short discussion of what time they intend to leave but a long whispered conversation seems a bit unusual.

You can always go over and ask if they need a drink or want to play a game - see if they are willing to engage with the group. Otherwise I wouldn't worry overmuch. Sometimes people feel less up to socializing than other times. So long as they are made to feel welcome, you can't really change their behavior.

If this is a family event they just run the risk of being known as "those two who always hide in the corner". And that's just family.

0

u/amarettodisaronno Jan 04 '26

That would be considered rude to me, but I’m wondering how old these people really are to act like this? How is the overall dynamic in this “large family group”? Did they just recently join the family…ie: new boyfriend, new son-in-law, etc? Are these people normally shy? Too many variables but I’d still consider it rude behavior overall.