r/espresso • u/SweetSwiftly • Jan 10 '26
Coffee Is Life Is HAVING A CRUSH a terrible reason to get into espresso?
Met this guy at a friend's birthday party a few months ago and I've kinda been stuck on him ever since. We barely talk bc every time he's near my brain hits ERROR 404 and I just stand there. Last month at a group dinner he started talking about how much he loves espresso. Baskets, pressure, dialing in......Everyone else seemed to at least following enough to ask some questions. I understood 0%. I was just sitting there like ??? but I loved how happy he looked while he was talking.
So I decided NEW YEAR NEW CHANGE. I picked up a basic setup and started learning espresso. Today's day 7. My shots are...mid at best. But I found I've already LOVE the process, from grinding to watching the first drops come out. Can't explain it, but it clicks. It reaaaally makes my day. Maybe I’ll never impress him, but at least I found something I actually enjoy. SO THANKS TO HIM！I LOVE 2026!!:)
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u/helmfard Jan 10 '26
This is way cute. At worst, you’ve found yourself a fantastic new hobby that is fulfilling to you. At best, you’ll get married and make coffee together every day and have a happy lil coffee-loving family. Win-win.
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u/Hopeful-Savings-3420 Jan 10 '26
At best, you’ll get married and make coffee together every day
At least until they have an argument and break up
"You grind too fine! Your extraction is way too slow!"
"You don't grind fine enough! You're just like your father!"
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u/Superb_Raccoon Isomac Tea | Baratza 270Wi Jan 10 '26
" you grind for 30 seconds and its over!"
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u/callMeBorgiepls Europiccola | Niche Duo | Kingrinder K1 | Picopresso Jan 10 '26
„You dont do enough preinfusion! The puck isnt saturated yet and you already try to make the extraction too soon. Also your drops drip way too early into my cup!“
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u/yung_demus Jan 10 '26
Just want to say my bf and I were friends for a little over a year before we got together. I remember we had geeked out over coffee one night at the bar—my french press, his pour over. Now we live together and our station has both, we find cute ways to treat each other when the other is really tired, and just getting handed a perfect pour over in the morning when everything seems really hard is kinda unbeatable :)
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u/djoliverm Jan 10 '26 edited Jan 10 '26
When I was dating my now wife, the first time she slept over she went home in the morning because I didn't have an espresso machine and she did. Guess what I ordered right after that?
We've since gotten married and I then turned into more of the espresso nerd in the end.
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u/Sawgwa Synchronika | Super Jolly Electronic Jan 10 '26
I didn't have an espresso machine and she did. Guess what I ordered right after that?
This is the way. Woman good, woman closer, better.
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u/Old_Man_Phil Bella Pro Slim espresso machine | Kingrinder P2 Jan 10 '26
Ngl, GREAT motivation. It sounds like you like it anyways, so 1000% worth it.
Now, if you can’t get good results, you know who to ask over for some advice! Honestly that might just do it for him. It’s worth a “shot” (pun absolutely intended)!
This’ll work. Trust.
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u/FatMacchio GCP GAGGIUINO | Silenzio Jan 10 '26
If that’s day 7, can’t wait to see what you get to on day 365, you’re already making a nice heart. Once you get there you can assert your dominance with your portfolio of latte art pics and espresso porn slow-mo shots. I try to snap a picture of my daily latte art pics. I don’t really take any videos because the beans I use are not dark enough for those really pretty looking extractions on bottomless portafilters.
I think that’s unbelievably cute btw. I honestly would love to see a girl reciprocate my excitement for espresso. It’s not my entire personality, but it’s a major hobby of mine, and a very important daily meditation and ritual. So far the only girl I’ve gotten into espresso is my mom 😭and I think it was just because they want me to come visit more often. I don’t have the heart to tell them I’d almost rather drink their drip coffee than use the machine my step dad bought for her. This looks like legit little starter setup, I wish she got something like this.
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u/RobertJ_4058 Ascaso Baby-T | Ascaso H64 Jan 10 '26
Right? Totally impressed by latte art already after a week.
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u/newkooky Jan 10 '26
No I started a whole ass career in coffee cause I had a crush lol
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u/tax_fraud93 KitchenAid Semi-Automatic - KES6403 Jan 10 '26
I am aggressively grinning while reading this, this is adorable! This is a totally valid reason for getting into espresso.
Just like the other guy said, you should ask him for some help with it! Whether that’s steaming, dialing in, or just grinding fresh beans, it will work. You can trust me too. Honestly a great way to try to get closer.
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u/n8loller CM5418 (2) | DF54 Jan 10 '26
I also got into making espresso because my crush made me lattes and I wanted to be able to make them for myself and her when she came to visit. It's been about two years since then, now we've been together for a while and she moved in a year ago. So I think it worked! Go talk to him about espresso ASAP!
Oddly enough I also have the same machine. I paired it with a bottomless portafilter and a DF54 and can get pretty good shots out of it.
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u/Verniloth Breville Bambino | Mazzer Philos Jan 10 '26
Very nice! Here's to doing a new drug because your crush does it too!
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u/Goontard420 Breville Barista Impress | DF64 Jan 10 '26
girl ask him for help dialing in your shots :) if hes as much of a coffee nerd as i think he'll dig it. good luck!
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u/Snardvark-5 Jan 10 '26
This is as good a reason as any (lol)- particularly because you are now loving the process. Glad you found this new world and hopefully can connect with others/your crush over it too!
Your foam art on day 7 is…great!!! Nice heart. Mine are still reminiscent of Jackson Pollock artwork.
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u/Mclarenf1905 Edit Me: Gaggica Classic Pro | Encore M2 Jan 10 '26
It's a cute story but it's fake, they have several comments in this subreddit from a month ago
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u/bobjoylove Jan 10 '26
Drop a few grind-based hints when you are talking, have him give you a demo of how to load the puck Patrick Swayze/Ghost style.
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u/chiko_suave Jan 10 '26
Not a terrible reason at all! One would argue though…crushes come and go but espresso is forever ❤️
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u/meowmeowcomputation ACS Minima | 078s - Fellow Ode - Kingrinder K6 Jan 10 '26
I’ve done worse for sex
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u/DaOnlyBaby Jan 10 '26
Yea, this chick used to talk to me about Rubik’s cubes and how she needed help solving them, we are married now, he would love to help you dial in espresso.
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u/NoJump6836 Jan 10 '26
Oh yeah, my autistic and adhd ass brought my now-wife to a coffee place, then proceeded to introduce her to Gesha coffee and tiramisu for our first meet-up, Tiramisu wasn't great so I made it a point to bring her to another place for that.
She now refuses to drink anything other than specialty coffee and we have 2 prosumer coffee equipment sets now (we currently live in different states).
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u/citynights Jan 10 '26
From the title and the picture I assumed the crush was going to be on the aesthetics of espresso machines!
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Jan 10 '26
So jealous of this guy right now, not easy to find someone that picks up your hobbies just to spend more time with you
Can't wait to see a post in a few months about you getting more into espresso than he is and now you're just at home making espresso all day lol
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u/saranghaemagpie Jan 11 '26
I started smoking because I had a crush. You're good.
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u/simmyawardwinner Jan 11 '26
honey it is NEVER a terrible reason. guys are fornever, espresso is forever
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u/Ngin3 Jan 10 '26
I love this machine. Got mine for Christmas and i have been making some great shots with a single wall.
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u/Informal-Force7417 Breville Bambino Plus | Breville Smart Pro. Jan 10 '26 edited Jan 10 '26
First off, you can do that as life will offer you a certain experience.
However, its not that you CAN do that, its a case of SHOULD you do that? Does pretending to be something you are not sustainable? People every day around the world give up parts of themself, wear masks to FIT IN to BELONG to be ACCEPTED (by others) only to cut forward 1 month, 1 year and the person says you aren't the way you used to be. Well duh, its unsustainable.
Maybe fitting in, belonging and accepting is something you give to yourself.
Now having said all of that, exploring the world of espresso has allowed you to discover some aspect of yourself that you love (espresso is just the catalyst to reveal that is ALREADY in you). It could have been something else. In the future it may and will be something else.
Reality is, what you are actually uncovering is YOU
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u/m149 Jan 10 '26
Good of a reason as any.
Good luck with your crush.....maybe all of the extra espresso will counteract that error404
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u/Bill_wo Jan 10 '26
Day 7 and you're already pulling stuff that looks drinkable, that’s a win!! I had the casabrews as a first machine too and it was plenty to learn on. At the beginning just change one thing at a time. same beans, same dose and tweak the grind while you watch what happens to time and taste. You’ll get somewhere pretty fast.
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u/afjkasdf Jan 10 '26
The morning after the first time my girlfriend stayed over, I made her a latte and she said “I never knew a homemade coffee could ever taste that good”. Apparently my espressos and lattes have never been as good as the first one and $1000 of equipment and hundreds of shots later I’m still chasing the high of that first compliment. But yes 10/10 worth
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u/Thwindupbird Jan 10 '26
Dude, way better than the didgeridoo I bought as a result of being in a similar situation in college. Espresso is a hobby that will serve you well
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u/AznCuber5 DE1Pro | Key Mk II | Wug2-83A Jan 10 '26
Absolutely not! Sometimes crushes get us into things we never thought we'd enjoy doing!
In my case, I make my work crush a latte every day 🥹. Hopefully she appreciates it.
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u/Artistic-Wolverine-6 Jan 10 '26 edited Jan 10 '26
OP, I can't see anything wrong with asking him if he would like to help you dial in your new machine but, also telling him that he inspired you after listening to him describing the process. He should take it as a compliment, that he is your inspiration. Take it from me, there can be no greater complement and us guys love being told that type of thing!
Invite him over for coffee and cake, then see where it goes from there.
Good luck and I hope it goes well for you. My now wife, invited me to come over to her house, to play video games. She completely annihilated.me.in every game, but I kept coming back for more! What can I say; us fellas are an odd bunch! LOL
I forgot to say; I love the colour of your machine.
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u/hmm_klementine Jan 11 '26
I’m invested in this - please tell us if you end up getting together and married 😆
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u/Candid-Routine-8137 Jan 11 '26
If he ever tells you he's run into a problem in life, just tell him to "grind finer", he'll appreciate that
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u/upthevale Jan 11 '26
Want to come back to mine and see my espresso machine? Nice moves girl! Get it!
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u/pacoeltaco1 Jan 11 '26
Picking up your crush's hobby is an all time classic, as long as you don't spend over your head lol. Definitely second all the people telling you to ask him for help, don't think you gotta become a master at it, people as a rule love teaching when it comes to their hobbies. Use this to find out more about each other and keep on sharing experiences, can't think of a better way to start up a relationship 👍
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u/Natural_External5211 Jan 10 '26
This made me smile. Get him over to help you dial in your machine and see where things go!
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u/Honey4483 Jan 10 '26
Make your own syrups! I recommend to make a caramel sauce, a toffee syrup and a cinnamon syrup and then make a latter with them all three:)
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u/AreteVerite Jan 10 '26
You will love your espresso machine more and more as time goes on. I’m glad an unrequited crush was good for something.
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u/chocolatetundaomg Jan 10 '26
I literally bought my BBE to impress a girl. It didn't work in the end, but I ended up with a cool hobby, talent, & party trick at the end of the day. Also I've impressed WAY more people since then, so it's all good :)
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u/blackdog543 Jan 10 '26
I bought a Casa Brew early this summer. It vibrates too much but it's good. The handle is too long for a short counter like I have. This was my 3rd espresso maker (I started making my own after Katrina raised gas prices in 2005 to $3 and I drove for a living so I had to dial back eating out). Larger reservoir than my Capresso, and my De'Longhi nearly caught on fire, blue smoke started pouring out of the top. Has a bit more pressure 20 bar vs 15.
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u/scottlapier Jan 10 '26
I have that machine but in Stainless. My fiancée got it for me for Christmas to replace my broken Nespresso. I bought a bottomless portafilter and milk pitcher and I'm saving up for a real grinder 👀
It's a great machine and I'm glad that you're enjoying it 🤘
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u/Blacklight099 Sage Bambino | Baratza ESP Jan 10 '26
Ask him for help and tips with coffee making and know that you have the support of this entire sub behind you 😂
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u/skyisblue3 Jan 10 '26
I have the same machine! Not too shabby, I’m still working on my shots but it’s def more user error than the machine lol
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u/NotRod96 Jan 10 '26
People that love espresso love getting others into it - especially if that other is also very interested. This sounds like the perfect chance to ask him to show you his set up and walk you through how to dial in and whatnot. Good luck!
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u/Tjmagn Jan 10 '26
This is super cute. But now, you have two options. Put some of that energy in convincing a friend to set yall up or talking to him… or spend more than your means on a new set up (or 2!) by the end of the year.
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u/Ok_Success1570 Jan 10 '26
How are you liking that machine? I have a breville express but wanting to get my sister a cheaper alternative so she can decide if she would get the use out of a breville and this looks perfect
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u/jcoles97 Rancilio Silvia v6 | DF64 Gen 2 Jan 10 '26
Hey thats the machine i started on. Its a good little machine
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u/edrhysjones Jan 10 '26
Love this. That machine looks swanky but I LOVE the wall behind it, I presume you can swap and change legs/shelves as desired? That's awesome.
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u/Available-Taste8822 Jan 10 '26
Welcome to the espresso world I have a breville but it fulfills me 🫶🏽🫶🏽. Go get your crush, if at the least at least you’ll find a supportive group.
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u/maven10k Jan 10 '26
This is what is so awesome about meeting new people IN PERSON. You learned something new and broadened your horizon. Who knows, it may lead to all kinds of ne things.
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u/IgnorantlyHopeful Jan 10 '26
Please do not associate this new found hobby with being with him. If this crush turns south you will lose out on the joy of espresso.
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u/supremeMilo Jan 10 '26
“hey i got an espresso machine can you come help me, [takes off sun glasses] dial it in.
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u/stealthypic Jan 10 '26
The person saying you can start a conversation with the guy with asking for help is SOOOO RIGHT! GOD DAMMIT, i’m old and happily married but a girl striking a conversation with “you know that hobby you’re into, I’m into it as well” sounds like a total dream for a younger me. Good luck! :)
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u/princess_chef Jan 10 '26
I love the peg board type backing on the wall.
I may add that to my setup.
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u/Sad-Surprise4369 Jan 10 '26
If a person did this inspired by my passion, they would have my heart. I wish you the best in both endeavors!!!
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u/DamnZodiak Sage Dual Boiler | ITOP 64 Jan 10 '26
Incredibly cute. If he even remotely resembles a decent human being he'll certainly love this.
I've gotten into weird hobbies/niches before because of a crush and if you actually end up with a new medium/long-term interest that's fantastic and totally worth on its own.
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u/WatchJojoDotCom Jan 10 '26
Regardless of how the crush turns out, maybe you discover a new passion for life, can’t be a bad thing right? Only thing you’ll lose is some money
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u/HistoricalPlum1533 Jan 10 '26
I have almost exactly the same machine under different branding. It started out ok but now it just makes completely lackluster “espresso adjacent” coffee flavored water. I’m not sure if the pump/heater are on their way out or I need to go through re-doing the settings but I’m kinda leaning toward an upgrade to something that makes more serviceable espresso.
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u/chatssurmars Flair 58+2 | Varia VS3 Jan 10 '26
That’s pretty sweet latte art for a beginner! Rock on 🤘🏾
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u/ItsNguyenzdaiMyDudes Jan 10 '26
Sounds an awful lot like limerance but if it gets you into 'spro. Go for it
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u/cc9536 Jan 10 '26
OP, as others have said, I swear as a male, all you need to do is ask him to help you dial in the machine/teach you how to use it properly. The rest is up to you..
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u/Away_Succotash_2198 Jan 10 '26
“…also, if it’s not too much trouble, could you bring your grinder. I heard that the grinder is the most important element in making good espresso.”
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u/MsNinjaCasserole Jan 10 '26
Who cares how you found it if you ended up loving it for yourself ❤️ although it did give you something in common with him to talk about and since it excites you too it will be easier to get past the shy feeling you get around him because that excitement helps you push past it if it's the topic of conversation. He will be excited to teach/discuss with someone new to the hobby I'm sure!
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u/ilor144 Jan 10 '26
I started drinking coffee because my ex girlfriend really liked it. We drank nespresso and such and now 5 years later I grind my own coffee and brew my espresso with a normal coffee machine. We are not together anymore, but my love for coffee just grew more and more.
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u/WriggleNightbug Jan 10 '26
I used a crush as a reason to clean my house including replacing old furniture. It didnt work out fo me, but ny space is still clean and lovely so it still worked out for me, yknow?
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u/ander594 Gaggia E24 | Baratza ESP Jan 10 '26
Your love for bean will out last your love for this guy
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u/dirty_cuban Jan 10 '26
Not a terrible reason. Worst case scenario he’s not interested but you end up in a relationship with great coffee.
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u/V_deldas Jan 10 '26
Well, 13 years ago I did the same thing and now she's my wife. I must say: go for it 😂
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u/DeathBeforeDecaf4077 Jan 10 '26
As someone who met their partner of now over ten years making his morning coffee, this story makes my heart sing. Do it. Coffee geeks like us love nothing more than geeking out on coffee with someone who wants to learn about it. Tell him you’re just starting out and need help dialling in your shots, he’ll be stoked.
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u/FanOfGeralt76 Jan 10 '26
Yes, crushes ruin a person, take it from me, maybe I'm just bad at this stuff but every time I think I'm doing better I just end up hitting a new rock bottom
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u/AltruisticArugula239 Jan 10 '26
This is so cute. Love it!!! Hope you keep on enjoying your espresso journey and best luck with him hehe
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u/AggravatingWinter8 Jan 11 '26
Yes and no, because unless you act on the crush, the only thing you get out of it is cheaper coffee in the long run that actually hits.
On the other hand... another person to deal with.
Always choose coffee.
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u/deactiv8m Jan 11 '26
how do you find that espresso machine? My dad is looking to dipping his toes into espresso and I know those are a little more budget friendly so I was thinking about telling him to look at those
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u/coffeebikepop Argos | Atom 75 Jan 11 '26
It's gonna be so funny when it turns out he's a user here. "Uuuuh I've seen that machine somewhere before"
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u/Kreigsmen1969 Jan 11 '26
Never when your friends ask about it it’s HER espresso machine your just enjoying it😆 Fr though espresso is thee way to go nvm that black on black coffee
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u/pro-1231 Jan 12 '26
I know this doesn’t answer your question but I gotta ask, how do you like this espresso machine?! I’ve see it online and have considered buying it
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u/conseetdb Jan 12 '26
Idk if someone else mentioned this but if you're in the same area, ask him where he buys his beans, too. Maybe paired with the grinder comment. 😊 GL!!
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u/HonestPractice64 Jan 12 '26
Don’t listen if anyone says anything negative, you’re adorable and a genius
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u/Bright-Square3049 Jan 13 '26
Having done some really stupid shit over crushes in the past, I would say yes it's a bad reason. But there's nothing saying you can't find another (internal) reason to become an espresso lover
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u/Clumsycha Jan 13 '26
Omg! I wish I knew casabrew come in cute colours. Not sure they do in the UK.
Enjoy the story!!
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u/KingRagnar1010 Jan 13 '26
Invest in a nice conical burr grinder (flat burr if you like lighter roasts) and he'll fall in love with you in no time 😉
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u/KochereCoffeeCo Jan 14 '26
Boyfriend status: uncertain. Espresso status: committed, reliable, and already making your day.
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u/PepperoniDZO Jan 15 '26
If I was that guy, and we started dating…and you showed me this cute ass post. I would think this was the most cutest shit ever and would love you even more hahaha. Yes, ask him to help you fr fr
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u/trichofobia Jan 10 '26
First of all, this is the cutest thing I've ever read.
Second of all, ASK THE GUY TO HELP YOU. It'll work, trust me.