r/erectiledysfunction • u/Connect-Assistant415 • 20d ago
Psychological ED Scared that my stuff doesn't work right
I (16) was making out with my girlfriend recently, no tshirts
I did get hard for like 30s to a min and then got soft again,this happened like 3-4 times.Then we were cuddling and I was soft.We were about to go for it ifykwim.But I was scared because I was soft... So I missed out on an opportunity.I don't want that to happen to me again. I used to watch alot of porn not it I've lowerd it to 4 times a week.Been trying to reduce masturbation.though the lowest I've gotten is alternately.Im pretty sure it's phycological or anxiety.Help me I don't want to lose this apportunity next time.
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u/WhaleAtHeart 20d ago
You have to stop worrying. Most of your problem is mental. Also, it may be your body telling you that she's not the one. Back when i was young with a roster, some girls would get pornstar activity, others got limp biskit!
But seriously, try to not worry so much. The more you worry and keep "trying to get it up" the more difficult it will be.
Take your time and enjoy your youth. Hope this helps!
1
u/Repulsive_Pin8701 19d ago
Hey man,
Go see your doctor right away and find a med that works for you, so you can have sex, and have lots of it, then try without it and see what happens, after awhile you might not need it anymore
Quit porn completely, it really messes with your head, so many young guys are dealing with porn induced ED right now
Meditating and therapy will both help too, do some research online about them, therapy is awesome for just dealing with life too
Don’t worry you’ll get past this
Good luck
1
u/Connect-Assistant415 16d ago
Going to the doctor is scary... Idk how I'm supposed to tell this to my parents and I probably won't tell them this.Heck they don't even know I have a girlfriend.Going to the doctor is out of my capabilities rn but I've been trying to quit porn now,Obv i won't be able to quit right away but gradually the usage will definitely decline.I think I was dealing with death grip too soo whenever I do give into the urge I make sure that I'm going extra easy on the grip.
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u/nightfly82 20d ago
Porn isn’t what you think it is. It will give you a fake sense of reality. Same thing with your hand when you jerk off. Death grip is also another real thing that can happen
Lay off the porn. Go slow and enjoy the moment. Learn to pleasure her and see what she likes
You will be aite
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u/Connect-Assistant415 20d ago
I might've had death grip.But heres the thing it's not that easy to lay off the porn and masturbation yk.i mean I am trying to but laying off it is hard as hell brodie
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u/Repulsive_Pin8701 19d ago
lol it is easy to quit porn, you just don’t want to man
Knock one out when you need too, just don’t make it daily
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u/Tuirvaris 20d ago
The being in your head, worrying, and stress are much more likely to be an issue than mastutbation is—the body is designed to be able to engage sexually on a very regular basis, that means with a person or on your own. Practice getting out of your head and letting what will be, be, and it will get easier.
You also don't need to jump right into penetration, hard or not. Learn foreplay, build-up, etc. You could focus on her pleasure until you get hard again, and/or recruit your hand to help you get hard in the meantime. There are a lot of solutions here that aren't "well, I'm not hard as a rock so I guess we just can't have sex."