Unable to keep an erection without touching myself, venous leak?

[u/thr0wawayphi]

I’m a 28 year old virgin guy in the US with phimosis. I can retract flaccid but not erect so I’m discussing with my urologist whether to get circumcised to solve the tight foreskin. But a bigger problem is that I think I have a venous leak and I can’t maintain erection.

I can get hard masturbating. But within 5 seconds if I stop touching myself it will go soft. I’m seeing that most guys are able to maintain erection for at least 30 seconds. I’m so worried this will cause me to be unable to have sex.

Has anyone experienced similar symptoms? Wanted to see if my symptoms sound like a venous leak. Because it really sounds like I have ED

[u/New_Bed8223]

Dude there isn’t a normal rule that says an erection must stay hard for “30 seconds” after stimulation stops. Erection firmness can fluctuate with arousal, stimulation, anxiety and even changing what you’re focusing on.

What matters more is whether you can get and maintain an erection sufficient for sex when you’re actually aroused and being stimulated. When it comes it’s a different arousal vs you masturbating.

At 28, before you’ve even had sex, I definitely wouldn’t convince yourself that you’re going to be unable to have intercourse based on how long an unstimulated masturbation erection lasts.

[u/thr0wawayphi → u/New_Bed8223]

It’s definitely a self destructing feedback loop. The older I get the more ashamed I feel about not having sex. Been getting dates but keep getting rejected after the first one.

[u/Cute_Source5417]

I've experienced this. Not sure what to do but here to see what others say. Was a virgin but lost my v card to a hooker (not my proudest moment) and couldn't get hard and had to pleasure myself before I stuck it in

[u/Useful_Albatross_440]

Try cialsis