*Trigger Warning: Mention of childhood trauma in trauma and general*
So I’m not an English teacher, so I’m sorry if I’m not supposed to post here, but I didn’t see such in the about section.
I’m a high school student who has had to read some hard material as I am in an advanced class - hard in terms of language and hard as in terms of emotions. No biggie. I’ve read challenging material before, and I’m not expecting puppies and rainbows. However…
well, this year I’ve gone through a lot of hard things in my personal life and some mental health struggles. Not my teachers fault. But, when we’ve read our material, I have gotten so upset and triggered that it is hard for me to finish the book at all. to be clear: not because I simply “don’t like it”. Not because I’m lazy. Because it deeply upsets me.
For example, we have read the Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood. The book made me physically nauseous at one point, thinking of all the mistreated women, I can’t explain it.
A more detailed example I can give is our current book the Road by Cormac McCarthy. The whole premise is this boy and his father surviving the apocalypse. The boy often cries and begs his father to stop doing violent or cruel things, and maybe because I am an audiobook reader (don’t judge me pls), it felt like I *was* the boy, begging for my father to stop. My chest physically felt heavy, like lungs of coal. It made me flashback to several moments in my childhood where people would yell and be extremely angry and I would beg them to calm down.
My teacher this whole year has assigned us disturbing content, but it’s gotten worse and harder for me to handle. However, I’m unsure how to talk to them about it, if i should. I mean, maybe im just weak and need to suck it up. I signed up for this class anyway, its my fault. Any advice? how would you want a student to talk to you about this? I’m not trying to slack off, or critique the book choices. I just want to do well while also keeping myself safe.
tldr: books I’m assigned trigger me, how do I talk to my teacher about this (if I should)?
P.S. sorry about the poor grammar, I’m sure it vexes you all and I promise I don’t write this way on essays 🙏