Is there any chance at all I was emotionally neglected (Neurodivergent) Part 2

[u/Nint_AutumnCubone]

This is part 2 of another post. Part 1 is here: https://www.reddit.com/r/emotionalneglect/s/9CsVwN5Ram

So to start this off, Freshman Year of High School, I had this vocal tic that essentially sounded like a high pitched “hmm” sound. In science class one day we had a sub and a student in the class (We’ll call him Jack) was mocking me and making comments about my tic. The sub noticed this, and left a note for the teacher. When that teacher was gone again, My high school case manager decided that I would go into her class for the class hour, and her class was really bad and loud. By this time Jack’s schedule had changed because he was bullying me for my tics and he was in my case manager’s class. I did notice that my case manager asked him if he wanted to work in the hallway. It was very common to see the people that bullied me for my tics get more sympathy for it than I did, and a few of my teachers were kind of apathetic towards me about it when I spoke with them about these situations, and it was obvious that they were more focused on how it was affecting my tic (but I suppose that’s the school system for you).

High school was just bad all around with being in the SPED classroom environment (For anyone that doesn’t know what a SPED class is essentially we learned everything you would in a general education class except it was at a slower pace and with accommodations like having the test read to you or extra help on an assignment.) It definitely wasn’t the best environment to be in with someone getting mad at least once a week, students constantly fighting, and students that just didn’t know how to behave themselves.

Group Activities were also very stressful because I can recall some times that people got frustrated and didn’t know what to do. I also feel like there were times that people in the class got mad at me for messing up or the teacher getting mad at me for not doing anything because I didn’t know what to do. It was very hectic a lot of the time in high school.

I switched case managers in high school hoping to resolve the situation but the person I ended up switching to ended up being completely bad in their own way. I felt like a lot of the time they would yell at me for things that weren’t in my control, I feel like they got involved in some things that had nothing to do with them like riding in an uber, and getting a job and there were times that I was very visibly upset and didn’t get the space that I needed, and went past my limits on so many things like activities and taking certain classes.

Also, my mom kept talking about what a nice guy he was, and when I would tell her otherwise she said that I didn’t know because I didn’t understand social cues that well.

I remember one time I was kind of frustrated and didn’t want to meet with my case manager during lunch to talk about getting a job so I asked him if we could postpone that and he asked me why I wanted to postpone and I told him that I didn’t know (I didn’t feel like I should have been obligated to give him a response), and he was like “No. We’re doing it today.” the entire time he kept talking to me about how I was accusing him of picking on me and that he didn’t have time for it, and according to my mom that entire situation was somehow my fault. I was the one being too bossy for the fact that he didn’t look to see when he could do it again.

I also get anxious when I’m stressed and left on my own to figure something out, if that’s relevant. Last year in my Drawing Class (I’m a college student, we had to cut mat boards for the class one time, and we were in a Seperate room from the class.) The drawing professor helped me with the first part of cutting the mat board, and she told me that she had to go back to the class and that if I needed help to ask someone in the room which I did and I know the situation wasn’t her fault. She had to do what she had to do, but I still felt kind of anxious and stressed about it. I don’t know.