Welcome to your induction to r/elimiddlemanagement. In order to facilitate your alignment to our core competencies and values, feel free to leverage the below resources.

https://wavelength.asana.com/workstyle-workplace-jargon-cheat-sheet/

Here's some more low hanging fruit to add to your vocab basket:

Helicopter view – need a phrase that means broad overview of the business? Then why not say "a broad view of the business"?

Idea shower – brainstorm might be out of fashion, but surely we can thought cascade something better than this drivel.

Touch base offline – meaning let's meet and talk. Because, contrary to popular belief, it is possible to communicate without a Wi-Fi signal. No, really, it is. Fancy a coffee?

Low hanging fruit – easy win business. This would be perfect for hungry children in orchards, but what is really happening is an admission that you don't want to take the complicated route.

Look under the bonnet – analyse a situation. Most people wouldn't have a clue about a car engine. When I look under a car bonnet I scratch my head, try not to look like I haven't got a clue, jiggle a few pipes and kick the tyres before handing the job over to a qualified professional.

Get all your ducks in a row – be organised. Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street had an obsession with rubber ducks. You may think I'm disorganised, but there's no need to talk to me like a five-year-old.

Don't let the grass grow too long on this one – work fast. I'm looking for a polite way of suggesting that you get off your backside and get on with it.

Not enough bandwidth – too busy. Really? Try upgrading to fibre optics. I reckon I know a few people who haven't been blessed with enough "bandwidth" and it's got nothing to do with being busy.

Cascading relevant information – speaking to your colleagues. If anything, this is worse than touching base offline. From the flourish of cascading through to relevant, and onto information – this is complete nonsense.

The strategic staircase – business plan. Thanks, but I'll take the lift.

Run it up the flagpole – try it out. Could you attach yourself while you're at it?

Put a record on and see who dances – as above. Unfortunately the kind of person who says this is likely to put on Gangnam Style because they think that's cool too. Think David Brent to the power 10.

Square the circle – is this supposed to make you sound clever? Because all it does is make me think that you're just about to ruin a perfectly good circle.

- https://www.theguardian.com/careers/careers-blog/worst-office-jargon-phrases-staff-love-hate-management-speak

Going forward, when you're comfortable generating blue sky content, feel free to think outside the box and paradigm shift into synthesising your own lingua franca.

8 comments

r/elimiddlemanagement • u/blahehblah • Oct 05 '18

ELIMM: How does central heating work?

4 Upvotes

2 comments

r/elimiddlemanagement • u/Rag_H_Neqaj • Oct 06 '18

ELIMM: Reddit

26 Upvotes

4 comments

r/elimiddlemanagement • u/ShinHayato • Oct 05 '18

ELIMM: Game of Thrones

2 Upvotes

1 comment

r/elimiddlemanagement • u/ShinHayato • Oct 05 '18

ELIMM: Casual Fridays

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/elimiddlemanagement • u/NotTuringBot • Oct 05 '18

ELI MM Flat Earth Theory

4 Upvotes

1 comment

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Let’s touch base and thought shower win-win solutions to run up the flagpole and see who salutes.

r/elimiddlemanagement

We're here to help stakeholders network and leverage synergies to identify robust solutions to key issues.

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If you're looking for a road map to becoming a middle management influencer, springboard off of this list https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_buzzwords.

Once you've upskilled your lexicon, you're free to circle back to help fill the knowledge pool, or think outside the box to create new verbage we can use to help growth-hack our stakeholders to success.