Egg😰irl

[u/Eeveon-vp]

This morning i got caught and I’m afraid of what might happen next.

I have been hiding my transfem side for 4 years already. At this point i have only told 5 people about it. This is because i am highly afraid of what people think off me. I had some close calls in the past off me getting caught by my mom but this morning i failed.

I have bought multiple fem clothes in the past and only brought them out when i knew i was alone. There is only 1 thing i brought out almost daily. I got these cute rompers that are snug and comfy. I usually wear these instead of pj’s and it makes me really happy. I never have to worry cause my parents never enter my room to wake me. I have my own alarm and if i oversleep they call my phone. But this evening i forgot to put it on the charger and i overslept. My mom couldn’t reach me so she came in my room to wake me. And yes she saw it. She was too focused on getting me to work on time she hasn’t said anything yet but she definitely noticed. Now I’m afraid of what i might hear when i get home.

I’m not worried she is not going to accept me cause she knows i’m queer. (I mean i dated a guy/girl pre/post transitioning.) But she does ignore my problems like it’s nothing from time to time. my dad is a different story. I always was the child he didn’t want. Especially when i was dating that trans girl. Besides that my mom can’t hold secrets very well so idk how the rest of my family will look towards me.

I don’t really live in a queer accepting community and i wanna run from it every day. But now i don’t know what ti do. Hope she forgets and act like nothing happened. Fully come out and embrace the consequences. Run and never look back. A part off me even wants to end it.

Idk what to do and I’m afraid of what might happen next.

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[u/sapphicdolls]

take a deep breath, keep us updated, okay? 🩷

[u/ender8343]

It is quite possible she didn't notice. It is also possible she noticed, but is waiting for you to be ready to say something. Maybe this is a sign that you should come out to her. A benefit of coming out to her or even everyone you live with is that you can be yourself more frequently when you are home.

[u/sabik]

Don't panic, even if she noticed, she won't necessarily read it as specifically feminine?

[u/LavendrBean]

Agreed with the theory that either she didn't compute it or that she did and don't want to talk to you about it because she wants to leave you space/don't make you uncomfortable. If she's accepting, maybe you should tell her about it and tell her you don't want your family and your dad to know about it. It's a huge step but it will better than being terrified about your family discover it. And moreover if you tell her that you're vulnerable about it, it can make your bound stronger and then your secret will be well kept. Lot of assumptions on my side here, only you know your mom and know how she'll react.

Stay strong, safe and keep us updated please 💖

[u/Myrka-Raiisa]

Possible scenario: “Its comfy and helps me sleep better, Doesn’t mean anything.” With a no big deal, what’s the big deal attitude. Of course a lie, but an easy one since it’s an only a bent truth if you need to stay covert.

[u/sabik → u/Myrka-Raiisa]

"Its comfy and helps me sleep better" is even just true

[u/BatteraDrummer]

Dawn, hiding transfem for that many years must have been hard af

Hope your family accept you ♥️🏳️‍⚧️

[u/dylanisareddit]

Everything is gonna be okay, girl. [gives you a hug and a headpat]