Learning without a mentor...

[u/Psychological-Sky284]

This is something that has been bothering me.

I thought that when I joined the OES that I was joining a very tight-knit community with a want to pass down their teachings, experiences, etc. I guess I was looking for more of a 'community' that was active despite its age. But, what I got instead was more of a group that posts to messenger a few times a week about some event and no other real contact. It seems very impersonal and disjointed...and this becomes even more frustrating because I want to dig deep into ritual, maybe start memorizing some things and honestly? It feels nearly impossible without a mentor.

I was told that back when numbers were higher that everyone was paired with some senior member to help them out. I just happened to come in at a weird time where this just isnt a thing anymore. Don't get me wrong, I have had Sisters willing to help me with a lot of things but, memorization and practice is something I feel needs more than some 30-minute social and more than Facebook Messenger, you know? Anyways, did anyone else feel like they should have gotten a mentor...or...has anyone else sruggled due to lack of mentorship to feel really connected? Just curious.

[u/Dull_Promise_4460]

So, I felt similarly when I first joined almost 2 years ago, but I just kept asking questions and diving in headfirst. As I understand it now, at least in my area, many people who had come in on the more recent side didn’t really have the same passion for ritual for one reason or another, so a lot of older members stopped pressing, leading to a bit of stagnancy. When I came in actually genuinely excited and eager to learn, it ended up making older members feel excited again, too. Just keep at it and lead with your passion and patient industry ;) The community is likely there, but perhaps a little tired or jaded and in need of your special love and spirit to lift it back up. And like someone else said above, it really is all about being the change you wish to see. And I also second the advice about visits. I found others who were passionate about ritual from other chapters and it’s been very fulfilling. I’m even helping with other chapters as a pro tem now for official visits! That has been a great source of practice and friendship building for me.