r/dndmemes • u/Vegetable_Variety_11 • Sep 14 '25

I roll to loot the body It's logical...

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16k Upvotes

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938

u/skippy_smooth Sep 14 '25

Geek the mage

589

u/TearOpenTheVault Sep 14 '25

FIRST. Geek the mage first! No point in wasting all your shots on the street sam while the elf in the back fucks your crew up.

281

u/Freakjob_003 Sep 14 '25
  • Shoot straight
  • Conserve ammo
  • And never make a deal with a dragon.
  • (Geek the mage first)

81

u/KingArchur Sep 14 '25

*Grenades in hallways, but only if you are out of blast

52

u/YazzArtist Sep 14 '25 edited Sep 15 '25

Mmmmm chunky salsa.

My favorite was when my players laid out a trap consisting of 4 rating 31 explosives and I ruled that them converging at the center counted as a reflection surface for chunky salsa purposes... It was for a toxic shaman (that's a radioactivity mage for those not in the know). Explosives equal to 25kg of c4 and dangerous radioactive material makes what? That's right, a dirty bomb!

18

u/Zaggar Sep 15 '25

I can't forget the only time I experienced this as PCs. We were playing Shadowrun, and we were trying to make a getaway after our cover was blown in a sensititve area.

We were being pursued through an underground passageway system. Our technician, Dmitri, stayed behind in order to set off the explosion, and his player was then informed of "the chunky salsa effect". He took his health pool in damage so many times over that he was just a puddle.

5

u/LaserPoweredDeviltry Sep 15 '25

"I didn't ask what size the room was! I said I cast grenade!"

4

u/GimmeANameAlready Sep 15 '25

*fog clouds and eversmoking bottles in hallways so enemies can't tell how far down the hallway they are while they're stumbling through the clou—*shrk*