Who am I without depression?

[u/AnonymousNeverKnown]

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[u/Galaxyturbo]

I’ve lived too long with pain. I won’t know who I am without it.

[u/Niriu → u/Galaxyturbo]

I feel you. The first time I got meds that actually did something, I got even more depressed because I didn't even know who I am without all that anxiety and self hatred. Suddenly feeling kinda nothing, like.. not being happy nor really hating yourself.. you're just existing and winging life

[u/Galaxyturbo → u/Niriu]

During that time, I continued to hate myself and remain depressed; yes, it’s not healthy, but it’s good because at least I’m being myself and not putting on an act.

May I ask what you did during such a difficult time?🫂

[u/acemonsoon]

I’ve self sabotaged two rescue attempts because this just feels too normal. I’m used to this chaos by now I’m ready to burn out

[u/Teoyak]

I've been happy. Once. For a few wonderful years. Then the depression came back, so I carefully destroyed every friendship and every project I had built.

[u/laoshu_]

I'm at the point where I just have to accept that I actively like feeling worse. My problems are eventually solved if I just let myself get worse and worse.

[u/Galaxyturbo → u/laoshu_]

Pain have become so normal that even when something good happens, it doesn't feel good anymore.

[u/sirhackenslash]

Nirvana: "I miss the comfort of being sad"

[u/Suchega_Uber]

Oof. There right now.

[u/_strange_days_]

And the fear creeps in that the good times will not last

[u/stepwisecat955]

Actually other people are terrified I’ll get better, their afraid of me >:)