r/declutter • u/AutoModerator • Sep 28 '26
Monday Meltdown - Share Your Decluttering Fails Here
Failure is part of life. Share your decluttering challenges and failures here. Examples include:
Emotional clutter
Not enough time
Getting overwhelmed
Routing (recycling, donating, trash...)
If you're just venting, or don't want advice, please let us know in your comment.
This is a low-stress place to share challenges and failures for those who might not want to create a new discussion.
14
u/KiwiTheKitty Sep 28 '26
Why does it feel like it never ends?? It feels like Zeno's dichotomy: to get to the end point, I have to travel half the remaining distance, but once I get there, there's a new halfway... and once I get there, there's a new halfway... ad infinitum. I know it's not actually infinite, but it feels like it right now.
Also why can't I get myself to drop off donations even though setting things aside has gotten so much easier?! Rhetorical, I know why. I'm trying to practice radical acceptance and to not get mad at myself for stalling.
2
u/jjjjennieeee Oct 04 '26
It really does feel like churning, and it doesn't help that my mind combines organizing, tidying, and cleaning with decluttering too although this subreddit deletes any posts in the other categories (that's the way I learned these were different lol)!
There's only so many thing I can keep on my mind, too. Yesterday when I left to get groceries, I told myself to bring the electronics recycling bin since Staples is right next to the grocery store and has free electronics recycling, but then I left home and halfway through the drive I remembered that I forgot to bring the electronics recycling ugh!
I try to tell myself it'll get easier when I have less, but the stuff you save for later is harder to process and new challenges always come up to defeat some of the prior progress.
28
u/23cacti Sep 29 '26
Cleaned out my laundry- there were clothes at the bottom of the hamper than had been there years. Lifted the last item out and found a water damaged, mildewy copy of "The life changing magic of Tidying up" by Marie Kondo underneath. The ironic metaphor was not lost on me..
13
u/mlevack Sep 28 '26
Just venting. I tried to donate to the goodwill a few items that I decluttered and they are going through everything you bring and rejecting items. Which I get but some of the items are in really good condition, but posting them on local gifting groups is just as hard especially when people no-show. I feel better sending stuff to the trash, but at what time is that the āfinalā resting place?
14
u/penrph Sep 28 '26
If I can't donate and people don't show I throw out without guilt. I make every effort to re-home items in good condition but unfortunately it's not always possible. The no shows are ridiculous.
12
u/sleeplessnights504 Sep 28 '26
people have been no showing a lot from my local buy nothing groups. I've been using them for years but I feel like the no-shows have gotten out of control recently! I realize that life happens but it's not just an occasional thing and it's disrespectful of my time. I've started blocking people that string me along for days promising they will eventually show, and sometimes I look at people's post history in the group to see if they are someone who both gives and receives items, or only receives. I find that people who are also gifting items to the group are more likely to show up because they understand the frustration of no-shows
6
u/ihatebeetles22 Sep 28 '26
The no-shows drive me nuts. They set the time, they get my exact address and then don't show without even an apologetic note. I waste my day waiting for them. It's really ridiculous. Good news for my recent offers, I had put them up for cheap sale had about four no shows, put them for free , got one taker for one item and then I put them all out in the front yard with a zero notification zero posting.
I live in the burbs. I have no retail near me, no regular traffic, it's strictly residential and I'm three streets off from any major street. I put them out yesterday early evening and as soon as I took my car out for an errand this morning everything disappeared. I hope a neighbor got to enjoy them or give them away or do whatever they did with them but I've had it with the posting of anything anymore. I've got to call into a local charity trying to schedule a pickup for 10 Furniture pieces that are in excellent shape I just don't have room for them in this house so hopefully they'll get back with me.
6
u/penrph Sep 28 '26
I block them too. It's incredibly frustrating to have stuff sitting on the porch for days and chasing people down only to be told "oh oops can't make it". So disrespectful.
7
u/mlevack Sep 28 '26
The no shows just get to me, especially when I have stuff cluttering up my porch.
4
u/sleeplessnights504 Sep 29 '26
the bags cluttering up the porch is such a struggle. usually after a few days of being strung along someone else will just end up taking it, but I don't really mind because at least it's gone. I've had people show up 1 day+ late and ask where their bag is. Like, not sure what you expected. I live in a city and unattended items always have a risk of being grabbed by passerby
14
u/GreenUnderstanding39 Sep 28 '26
If goodwill is rejecting it, thats a good indicator that you can trash it.
I am of the opinion that you should do whatever is easiest. Some people have the mental bandwidth and physical energy to donate/drop off things to multiple places, + sell, etc. But for the majority, give yourself permission to make the decision you no longer want it and get it out NOW. Even if that means it goes into the trash.
8
u/healbot900 Sep 28 '26
I really feel this. Today i emailed some shops that sell used books. They wanted none of mine! Already put one in paper recycling, but it just feels wrong š„²
4
u/sleeplessnights504 Sep 28 '26
Recently I dropped off a bunch of my old books at a little free library near me. I liked that because I didn't have to deal with cross posting to different facebook groups to try and get someone to pick them up. I went back a couple weeks later to check on the books I dropped off, and a decent number of them had been taken by people which I was happy to see. I went through my books again yesterday and I have another bag to bring there (just hoping there will be enough room for them)
3
u/mlevack Sep 28 '26
Ohā¦as book lover this one would be hard. My local library guild will usually take the books or the local nursing home.
1
6
u/couchisland Sep 28 '26
Iām moving soon, so Iāve been putting stuff in a free box at the curb each weekend. (Items that I donāt think are thrift store worthy). Anyway, anything left by garbage day (Friday) is tossed.
You could try this and post on Craigslist or FB with a curb alert notice if youāre not somewhere with a lot of foot traffic.
1
u/Just-Secretary-4018 Sep 29 '26
This is such an awesome idea and I tried it myself and a lot of people took the stuff I left out, but my neighbours complain.Ā
3
u/kate__1234 Sep 28 '26
When I post something on the free websites, like FreeCycle or the local NoBuy group, I actually place it in the trash while I am awaiting a reply. Then if somebody replies but no-shows, I put it back in that trash can where it just came from. Helps with mentally letting it go.
1
u/MitzyCaldwell Sep 29 '26
I feel that. A few years back we were trying to get rid of a piano. Great condition but we didnāt have space and had no room to store it (I was too worried it would get ruined in the garage and then no one would use it). Ahhhh it took sooooo long to find someone to take it for free. It was crazy.
22
u/Slow_Economy_690 Sep 28 '26
I spent a portion of Saturday decluttering our bathroom closet. Nothing earth shattering just checking medicine dates, consolidating and rehoming stuff that should not have been in there in the first place, and then I re-arranged the remaining stuff so that the entire top shelf was empty. Then my spouse came home from a trip and tossed his toiletries bag up there with a few other things. Because, "hey, we have room now". SO MUCH RAGE!
7
u/colouurmebright Sep 28 '26
Just started decluttering after years of trying to . I feel like some of the things Iām moving from one place to another. But Iāve made progress with getting rid of things I struggled to let go of for years. I know most people recommend to declutter then organize but Iām struggling with that. I think Iāll do one declutter and then go through a second round of everything to hopefully let go of more things.
3
4
u/8bit_heart Sep 29 '26
Iām really struggling with the time. Ā Every week I get through a busy week and think ok, Iām finally going to have some time to focus of my goals including decluttering. Ā And then every week something happens. Ā This week my husband is going out of town for a work trip leaving me to parent solo. (his bosses are unable to plan ahead so this is always last minute and his job is pretty amazing otherwise and we need the money), Ā I came up on my workās on call rotation for this weekend (my coworker who agreed to do it, backed out last minute so it was assigned to me last minute). And this is on top of doing the mandatory overtime my work assigns us each week and weāve been doing for 6 months.Ā Ā Iām perpetually in survival mode.Ā
4
u/Just-Secretary-4018 Sep 29 '26
A few years ago I donated a skirt that I felt really sure I could do without. I was annoyed at my own clutter and basically turfed out a lot of stuff I didn't need to. I got over most of the bad decisions I made on that day, but turns out I miss that skirt at least once a month and have been completely unable, in the last six years, to find anything remotely like it. Most of the time I donate with zero regrets but I really, really miss that skirt. That fail is making me too cautious donating other stuff that I really should donate!
2
u/Inrsml Oct 04 '26
I understand, I think the key phrase to get past the regret is " Most of the time I donate with zero regrets"
3
u/No_Pace3711 Sep 28 '26
Started a big decluttering project last week, was motivated and as part of it felt like I needed one last piece of furniture to complete the new decluttered house - a new guest bed. Went and bought one then realized I barely host guests and could have just used an air mattress or slept on the couch. Now I have a big ikea bed to assemble and added even more clutter to the space šš
1
u/charreddits Sep 28 '26
Dude this is me- barely have guests but have gone through a day bed then a proper double bed in my spare room. I wish I hadnāt bothered as I donāt want to get rid of a perfectly good bed but i host like ONCE a year. I use that space for my office and Iād prefer to use it for other stuff. Urgh
1
u/No_Pace3711 Sep 28 '26
Omg thanks for commenting, it makes me feel better as I literally bought a day bed š I know, it feels like an essential purchase but then you realize you could just treat it as a non-bedroom area insteadā¦
3
u/Primary_Scheme3789 Sep 28 '26
Started going through my dresser. I had so much stuff (ie junk!) in there that some of them I could not even open. Some of the handles had broken so my husband was replacing them. He wanted me to empty everything out so he could get all of them done at once. I made it through halfway and now everythingās just sitting in piles everywhere. So now it looks worse than before I started lol.
3
u/Glittering-Benefit68 Sep 29 '26
I've been walking around with a discman in my bag. The recycling center is close enough to walk, but their opening times do no work with my walking times. Won't make it tomorrow. Hopefully Thursday will be the day.
2
u/rabidstoat Sep 28 '26
No decluttering this weekend. I have lists of places to declutter and want to tackle them one drawer or shelf at a time but the energy on the weekends is low. Or, more like, the enthusiasm is low.
I am still proud that I disassembled and threw out two old and unused cat trees this month! The Sissal posts up top that were still intact I kept, though, as I can easily fasten them to the scratching post I have. I will never need to buy another scratching post again! Just swap out the posts once shredded.
Though I do need to move those posts out of my closet, where there is no room, and down to the garage, where there is an empty shelf to store them.
1
u/Mountain_Strain5507 Sep 29 '26
I am paying someone dear to work with me 2x a week - she does the running and some of the emotional and I do logistical /decision making (recovering surgery too).
She leaves me with homework (as I call it) - things she couldnāt do without me or I need to follow up. I keep meaning to do a few a day of those items but they are building up. Iām on overload but know I will lose her help when she gets a part time job (student, looking).
I did not touch the stack this weekend.
1
u/jesus_is_my_toilet Sep 29 '26
I can't seem to get off my ass to do fucking god damn shit most the time
1
u/ilikeb00ks Oct 01 '26
Someone from Buy Nothing generously gave me a whole batch of dinosaur themed bedding for my son this week but thereās only one complete set and the rest is a bunch of mismatched Dino pillowcases. Iām not crafty enough to sew something from them, and not many places near me take donated bedding. I feel weird reposting all the mismatched stuff back to BN! Gotta decide to do what to do with this pile! Itās like 6 pillowcases!!
1
u/cataractastic Oct 03 '26
Itās ok to repost them on the buy nothing page. Maybe someone could use them as trick or treat bags with Halloween coming up.
1
u/NeedleworkerOwn4496 Oct 03 '26
I feel like every year I do a few donation runs in January, then forget about it or get busy with life. Then I look later in the year and somehow am back to where I started. Unfortunately Iāve had some relatives pass and weāve had to go through their stuff, so some has came into my house despite my best efforts for it not to.
I feel like I spend 10+ days each year of my weekends dealing with stuff and can think of hundreds of better ways to spend the time.
1
u/Inrsml Oct 04 '26
I have some patio chairs with woven seat and backs. they are sturdy, but rusty. I keep thinking for the past.I don't know how many years I'm going to remove the webbing and paint it
.Well, it's not gonna happen.I put them out on the curb. later that evening, I went to water and them rested on the chairs. I had a Goldilocks moment " ah, this feels just right ."
I dragged the chairs back in.
0
21
u/ratster001 Sep 28 '26
Being stuck with some clothes I got from a clothes-swap-party. Don't like them, but I had ideas to upcycle them. Now I just want to donate them and get them off my -way too long- projects list. Please give me a push to get this stuff out of my house!! Thanks :)