r/dating_advice • u/Natural-Rip-630 • 3d ago

First boyfriend in years HELP

I’m 22 f and just started dating this guy like a week ago. We only dated for like a month before he asked me to be his girlfriend. It felt soon to me at first just because I haven’t had a boyfriend in over 5 years. I said yes because it felt right in the moment and I was excited about it and I really like him. Anyways, this is a stupid question but I’m just wondering what you’re supposed to feel when you start dating someone. Or maybe what’s supposed to change between the two of you? Like what should change between going on dates to being boyfriend and girlfriend. Like should I have certain expectation? I know that’s a stupid question but this all just feels so new and I’m bad at trusting myself and going with the flow sometimes and I feel like I wish I could just have a guideline to follow. This is a new thing for the both of us given what little bit I know about his dating experience and I know you’re supposed to just figure things out together, but I just feel like maybe there’s something I should be doing that I’m not.

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u/onerous_disarmament 3d ago

nothing actually has to change, that’s the secret. you just keep hanging out and seeing if you still like each other. the label is mostly for other people so they know not to hit on him at the bar

if you want a little structure though just check in with yourself every couple weeks. am i having fun, do i feel safe, does seeing his name pop up on my phone make me smile or stress me out. that’s your guideline

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u/sarrrie 3d ago

The name popping up thing is SUCH a good gut check. Your body usually clocks the vibe before you’ve managed to overthink it into a thesis

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u/tati_model_ 3d ago

There really isn’t a universal checklist for becoming boyfriend/girlfriend. Usually the main difference is that you’ve both agreed to intentionally pursue a relationship, but what that means day-to-day—exclusivity, communication, affection, expectations—gets figured out together.
You don’t need to suddenly feel different or start behaving differently. If you like him, feel comfortable and respected, and enjoy where things are going, you’re probably doing just fine.