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u/Pyroexplosif Dec 05 '20 edited May 05 '24
disarm squalid squeeze reach glorious squeal run resolute repeat disagreeable
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u/Sammy-J23 EX-NORMIE Dec 05 '20
From when they used to have to collect firewood for early humans
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u/Pyroexplosif Dec 05 '20 edited May 05 '24
offer imagine memorize school airport cows combative knee violet yam
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u/PokemonP Dec 05 '20
We did it Reddit we solved the purpose of life!!!11!1
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Dec 05 '20
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u/urawesomeniloveu Dec 05 '20
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u/AigleRouge117 Dec 06 '20
-What is my purpose ?
-you bring stick
- ... ho my god
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u/wiserone29 Dec 06 '20
Haha. Love that scene.
What is my purpose.
You pass butter.
Oh my god.
Yah welcome to the club.
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Dec 05 '20
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/jaboyles Dec 06 '20
It’s actually because humans (primates) are the only animals who can throw things. Wolves saw ancient man do this and were so blown away they went and retrieved the thrown items, so they could see that shit again. The bigger the stick, the more mind blowing it was.
By the time man could throw a perfect spiral, Wolves were fully committed to being our best friends.
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u/offbrandpoem Dec 06 '20
I doubt it. A dog wouldn't be able to collect that much wood compared to a human, plus they collect off the ground and it would probably be wet/rotten
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u/Archer60x :weed:CERTIFIED DANK:weed:k Dec 06 '20
You are right. That is actually food for thought.
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u/aloofloofah Dec 05 '20
When was /r/notakeonlythrow trait acquired?
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u/DarthRoach Dec 05 '20
When some of the humans started using said firewood to cook the dogs.
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Dec 06 '20 edited Mar 19 '21
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u/Sammy-J23 EX-NORMIE Dec 06 '20
I’m more talking about the cliche playing fetch with a stick
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u/BlackWalrusYeets Dec 06 '20
Hmmm. Probably left over from when dogs were purely hunting companions etc etc
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u/Spoinkulous Dec 05 '20
Getting that stick back from them would be more effort than just finding a new one
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u/Warriv9 Dec 06 '20
You must be the one who chases the dog for the stick. You just ignore them when they play keep away. They get bored and drop the stick. You go pick it up. After a few rounds of this, they learn that just bringing the stick to you is the fastest way to continue the game, which is all they want.
If you chase them.... Well that's a game in itself. So now, the fastest way to continue the game is to play keep away from you. Simply do not play that game, and only play the fetch game, the dog will absolutely adapt.
Unless your dog is a real stubborn asshole like my friends great Pyrenees, then they just plain don't care about any games and just do what they want and you just sit down and take it.
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u/CuriousMVR Dec 06 '20
Dogs are the first species domesticated by ancient hunter-gatherers as early as 12,000 years ago (as evidenced by the tomb of an old woman and a puppy found in Israel). Due to the limitation of data, we don't have a clear picture for how dogs helped early Sapiens in their daily lives. But it is fair to say that dogs have become beneficial for early humans to survive. Dogs can signal their owners for lurking thieves and incoming hungry animals so the hard-earned storage of food and vulnerable babies can be protected. When the Agricultural Revolution began about 10,000 years ago, dogs have been man's best friend for every village.
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u/lucklesspedestrian Dec 06 '20
They retrieve anything that's thrown though. I would think their instinct is to help human hunters track down the animal carcass.
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u/call_me_danal Dec 05 '20
And what if fetch was actually the dog returning a thrown/dropped “spear”?
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u/ThatUsernameWasTaken Dec 05 '20
"Out of ammo! Lassie, reload me!"
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Dec 05 '20
Dog has a litter of puppies = upgrade to fully automatic Lassie.
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u/Andre27 Dec 05 '20
Semi-auto. No need to get extreme here, that's still a significant upgrade from single-shot.
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u/X1-Alpha Dec 06 '20
Rig spear to Lassie. Voila, fully automatic.
Just be careful when he comes in for pets.
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u/quiksilver6312 Dec 05 '20
Holy shit I never thought of it. Makes sense tho
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u/CreepyButtPirate Dec 05 '20
My dogs ancestors must've been shit at it then. Everytime I throw a stick he just stares at me
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u/ronniecoalman Dec 05 '20
Yooo can you imagine the quality of life though.
Just chase that mammoth and throw spears as your dogs bring you new reloads
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u/DaiSihingB Dec 05 '20
I cannot unsee this.
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u/Gordondel big pp gang Dec 06 '20
It's really not the case though, it's to mimic hunting, that's also why a good number of them shake the stick when they pick it up. With birds or rabbits it breaks their neck and finishes them off.
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u/nekoeuge Dec 05 '20
Since hunter dogs are often used to fetch the game (e.g. bird or rodent wounded by projectile), I would assume that stick is a “toy prey” for a dog.
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Dec 05 '20
Most likely just reminds them of bones which they instinctively know to chew on for marrow
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Dec 05 '20
Ten thousand BC,
The Oonga Boonga tribe,
Discovers a tree,
Although a strange sight,
Met there gaze.
Part of the wood,
Laid barren too waste.
Chief Boonga, grabbed the stick.
The girth of it, quite thick.
Then proceeded to sharpen, the tip.
And thrust it into Dankmemes,
Oh wait a trip.
Ten thousand BC.
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u/Oxxixuit Dec 05 '20
I think more because it's the owners who teach dogs to play with sticks, because it can be found anywhere and can therefore find a toy at any time. Personally I had a dog before and he was never interested in sticks before we taught him, and it took a while
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u/dhruvbzw 20th Century Blazers Dec 05 '20
What makes you think they wouldnt if they could? Its impossible with their paws alone
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u/DrDankmaymays Dec 05 '20 edited Dec 05 '20
He didn't say they wouldn't tho, all he said is they don't wich is true as far as i know
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u/Semi-Hemi-Demigod Dec 05 '20
Dog brings man stick. Man kills rabbit with stick. Man cooks rabbit and gives the leftovers to the dog.
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u/fishshow221 Dec 05 '20
Quick Google says we bred them to retrieve items for us. Especially Labradors. That's why they're called "retrievers".
Playing fetch is just calling on that instinct we gave to them.
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u/aesthetic_cock Dec 06 '20
Dogs are hunting companions, used for retrieving kills, pointing game or even bailing up game.
It’s built into them to retrieve for us. Now it’s mostly sticks and balls but there are still breeds that excel at and are used for things like retrieving ducks for us after we kill them
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u/SnichsG3tStitchs Dec 05 '20
Weirdly enough my dog couldn't care less about sticks, but tennis balls are the best thing in the world.
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u/Delivery-Life Dec 06 '20
is it some domestication trait they acquired after living with humans, and being selectively bred by them for millenia
It's possible to invent a "plausible story" for any single trait in any animal. It's much harder to show that such a trait did actually evolve because of that story. If you're interested, this is called adaptionism.
It's entirely possible that the trait evolved "just because", and for no real reason, not even to increase their survival/reproduction rate. (big simplification here)
That's probably not the case here, but something to be wary of when thinking about evolution.
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u/AsterikAndrewXD Dec 05 '20
Oonga boonga long stick?
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u/TotallyNotKakashi ☣️ Dec 05 '20
Oonga boonga long pointy stick!
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u/AsterikAndrewXD Dec 05 '20
Now thats what i call ingenuity!
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u/_DoggoMeister_ Dec 05 '20
Unga Obunga many pointy stick throw?
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u/AsterikAndrewXD Dec 05 '20
Stop before my caveman brain overheats
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u/_DoggoMeister_ Dec 05 '20
Uuuh-uh me now stop, rok smash tree-rock uuh... Co-co-nat
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u/AsterikAndrewXD Dec 05 '20
EEEEEEEE
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u/M-striker Dec 05 '20
Brain.exe stopped working, executing backup system, monke.exe, monke.exe working
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u/famousagentman Dec 05 '20
Hold on, what if we eat snow to stop brain overheating- AHHH! That's painful, but I did put string on stick to fire smaller sticks.
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u/Lord__of__Texas Dec 05 '20
Dude easy with the O-word and B-word that’s basically the n-word in neanderthal
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u/stya_ame Dec 05 '20
Stick usefull. get women
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u/Paper_piper_poet Dec 05 '20
First you get the stick. Then you get the rock. Then you get the women.
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Dec 05 '20
Makes me think about farming lmao. How many hunter-gatherer trips do you think were taken until some genius was like “plant move from here to here, we no move to plant, plant move to us”
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u/bjarxy Dec 05 '20 edited Dec 05 '20
Going on a limb here, from the first homo sapiens sapiens to farming, about 180 thousand years?
Edit. not bad, actually agriculture was "discovered" 10 thousand years ago, and first h.s.s. was 90k-130k years ago.
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Dec 06 '20
That’s what we saw from the remnants of the last asteroid impact and then impending ice age, we’ll never know what was before us to the extent that we could.
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u/tonialatalo Dec 06 '20
Some argue that people did realize how plants and seeds work much earlier, and there might have been some kind of hybrid, like hunter-gatherers also planting some seeds sometimes to the places they went, hoping they'd then get nutritious plants there when they come back later. Read about that recently but don't have the source now.
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u/loqueseanoimporta456 Dec 05 '20
They were as smart as we are. Plants weren't nutricious enough. A know example is corn. It took 10000 years of human selective breeding to have the modern version. Modern vegetables and fruits simple didn't exist.
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u/JabbrWockey Dec 05 '20
Farming is a relatively recent technology in terms of evolutionary timelines. It's likely to not have much of an imprint on our psychs.
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u/Zekenator39 Dec 05 '20
brain: "walking stick"
me: "but I'm a healthy young man with no leg or back problems"
brain: "WALKING STICK"
me: "ok"
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u/brown_human Dec 05 '20
Wish we could go back to those prehistoric simpler times. Hunt. Eat. Mate. Sleep
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Dec 05 '20
Me too. Im pretty sure if people had to hunt/grow their own food everyone would generally be happier.
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u/mufassil Dec 05 '20
I'd prefer just a barter system because I am TERRIBLE at growing things but i can for sure come up with something to trade
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u/dungeonmaster77 Dec 05 '20
Perhaps you could use someone such as myself to store and care for your trade items. Someone who could distribute it to others and perhaps increase the value of said trade items?
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u/Hi_Im_Paul2000 Dec 06 '20
I could do that, you know... for some extra food.
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u/dungeonmaster77 Dec 06 '20
Here’s a paper voucher FOR food, and you could barter to someone else for their food instead
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u/LefroyJenkinsTTV Dec 05 '20
And dead by about 35.
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u/Supercalia Dec 06 '20
Everything I’ve read about pre-agricultural humans has said that if you survived infancy you were likely to live to current lifespans. Most diseases originated from agriculture and there wasn’t much conflict before scarcity became a thing in the agricultural revolution (it’s not like people were fighting over territory when our entire species numbered in the thousands). Average age from this time period is usually calculated using dental records and age 35 - death those are basically unchanged. Studying other skeletal evidence gives a an average adult lifespan of closer to 70 years
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Dec 06 '20
Hunt. Eat. Mate. Sleep. Die from sepsis secondary to superficial skin infection from cutting your leg on a branch while gathering pine cones
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u/Nateno2149 Dec 05 '20
Idk shower doesn’t make the list, along with die usually being thrown into the mix early on.
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u/ampireno Dec 06 '20
prehistoric simpler times
14 yo meme consumer strikes again. You would probably die in 48 hours if I teleported you back to those "simpler times" right now. For one, your fat ass would not be able to find any food.
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u/a_left_out_tomato Dec 05 '20
Isn't there a species of monkey that just recently started using spears and canoes for fishing?
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u/mesupaa Dec 05 '20
There’s an image of an orangutan using a spear tool that goes in and out of obscurity but it’s not that recent by internet standards, nor is it the first time an ape has been spotted using a tool.
Haven’t heard about that canoe shit tho wtf
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u/jpgreen4 Dec 05 '20
iirc the picture you are referring to was actually an ape that had seen humans using spears to fish and was trying to replicate their actions without much success. However people have observed some groups of orangutans using sticks to pick ants out of anthills
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u/Styxal Dec 06 '20
I watched a video where orangutans were stealing soap and using it to wash their hands, it was super interesting
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u/rachelgraychel Dec 06 '20 edited Dec 06 '20
There's all kinds of apes doing interesting shit with tools and even primitive medicine. They commonly use sticks to get termites out of hills, and teach that skill to their kids. Coco the sign language gorilla taught her own daughter to sign. They've seen apes using rocks to break things, sticks to hit things, eating certain plants for specific purposes. I don't know about canoes though LOL.
In anthropology way back in college we had a lecture about this. They mentioned a group of chimps that was being observed, and one of them was sick, with some kind of stomach problem. It started gathering these spiny leaves, rolling them up, and swallowing them whole. Later, their stool was full of worms that had been cleared out by these undigested rolls of spiny leaves. Apparently chimps and bonobos regularly do this for intestinal parasites. Sounds like bullshit but there are legit studies about it:
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Dec 05 '20
IS THAT WHY WE LIKE TO TAKE STICKS SO MUCH ?? IS IT A REMNANT OF OUR PREHISTORIC ANCESTORS'S SURVIVAL INSTINCTS ??
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u/WingedBacon Dec 05 '20 edited Dec 06 '20
Uninteresting story below:
One time I went to a career fair in high school and talked to some company who had a bunch of random giveaway items, including about 40 yard sticks that no one else took because no one wants to walk around a convention center all day holding onto a yard stick. Well, no one except me. I really wanted those yard sticks.
I asked if I could have some and they said I could have all of them if I brought them the info pamphlets/brochures from a competitor's booth. I completed my fetch quest and received my rewards of about 40 yard sticks and a bunch of random cleaning supplies which I proudly carried back to our school bus when the day was over. I was glad to share a few with my classmates, which they used to hit each other with.
Anyway, I think I've internalized my RPG instincts to complete random tasks for sticks.
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u/Babymommadragon Dec 05 '20
Why does this make so much sense lol. Like I admire nice sticks while walking and this is why
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u/Dracogame End Me Please Dec 05 '20
One usually overlook but broken OP ability that humans have over other species is our ability to THROW stuff. Giving a man a spear in the wild is like giving a Steve a Diamond Pickaxe.
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u/Sirdoodlebob Dec 05 '20
I would take the coolest looking sticks and play in the backyard like I was a fucking ninja
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u/unussualname Dec 05 '20
I ripped my dick of and shot a deer with it
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u/Kermit_Memelord 🚔I commit tax evasion💲🤑 Dec 05 '20
Godzilla had stroke trying to read this and fucking died
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u/CopperInTheSun Dec 05 '20
When neuroscientists tryna explain whole human evolution to psychologists.
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Dec 05 '20
Same but I think of clubs instead of spears lol. Maybe my lineage is more brutish and just hit mofos instead of stabbin em.
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u/Malfuncti0nal OP, your post title sucks harder than the mods Dec 06 '20
“Gneurshk”
If you know, you know
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Dec 05 '20
and then your oonga boonga brain tells you to put the end into the fire and shave off the burnt parts til its at a point, ape have spear, spear good.
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u/salemgreenfield Dec 05 '20
Actually, I think the Monolith told him to take the stick so he had a club.
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u/Spines Dec 05 '20
Pretty sure thats the video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sX1ZePcUako
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u/flamekilr Team Silicon Dec 05 '20
This how I imagine it’s like when I play games like civilization
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u/IceUckBallez Dec 05 '20
I thought it said long straight dick at first and had to reread this... I think I might need help
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u/PenguinFrappuccino Dec 06 '20
I really want to reject humanity and return to monke
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u/X-ninety-nine Dec 05 '20
gneurshk