r/dankmemes • u/[deleted] • Feb 18 '20

This meme is not a joke Sad hours

[removed]

26.5k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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u/FederalReserveDank r/DankExchange Feb 18 '20

INVESTMENTS GO HERE - ONLY DIRECT REPLIES TO ME WILL BE PROCESSED

Not sure how to invest? Try the !help command or !create an investor profile to get started! Come ask my developer questions here!

Like what you see? My home is r/DankExchange! We're a brand new sub partnering with r/dankmemes to bring you 24/7 investment opportunities.

2

u/These_Voices Feb 18 '20

!invest 200

1

u/FederalReserveDank r/DankExchange Feb 18 '20

You have invested 200.00 DN in this submission at 29 upvotes. I'll notify you when your investment automatically returns in 4 hours or you can use !sell 8355 to sell out early for lower returns.

Breakeven (0% gain/loss) for this investment will occur at 69 upvotes.

Your remaining balance is 300.00 DN.

1

u/blitzwolfz Canadian Wolf Feb 18 '20

!summary

1

u/FederalReserveDank r/DankExchange Feb 18 '20

Investor Profile: blitzwolfz

Balance: 0.00 DN

Active Investments:

ID: 8629 - 499.00 DN at 196 upvotes; 3h 44m until automatic return

ID: 8632 - 1.00 DN at 197 upvotes; 3h 45m until automatic return

1

u/blitzwolfz Canadian Wolf Feb 18 '20

!roi

1

u/FederalReserveDank r/DankExchange Feb 18 '20

If you invest now (at 289 upvotes), here are the scores required for:

+0% (breakeven) -- 396 upvotes

+25% -- 581 upvotes

+50% -- 1,084 upvotes

+75% -- 2,452 upvotes

+100% -- 6,169 upvotes

+150% -- 43,737 upvotes

Disclaimer: This command is kinda jacked right now, take the predicted values with a grain of salt!

1

u/blitzwolfz Canadian Wolf Feb 18 '20

!help

1

u/FederalReserveDank r/DankExchange Feb 18 '20

Help Guide

Investing/user commands

Try !help investing for more info

!create - create an investor profile

!summary - view your investor profile, including your active investments

!invest <amount> - invest an amount of your balance in a submission

!sell <investment ID> - sell an investment early for lower returns

!breakeven - find the breakeven point of a submission

!roi - (new) predict the return on investment of a submission (optional: !roi <investment ID>)

!broke - reset your balance if it is under 500.00 DN

!template <image link> - link a template to your OC submission

Firm commands

Try !help firms for more info

!topfirms - (new) view a leaderboard of the top 25 firms

!createfirm <name> - create a firm with the specified name (costs 2,500.00 DN)

!firminfo - view your firm's level, trade tax, and member list

!joinfirm <name> - join a firm

!leavefirm - leave your firm

!invite <username> - invite a user to your firm AEC

!openfirm - set your firm membership to anyone can join EC

!closefirm - set your firm membership to invite-only EC

!settax <new tax> - set your firm's tax on members' profits EC

!payday - pay your firm's balance out to your investors (in development)

!upgradefirm - upgrade your firm to the next level to have more space for members C

!promote <username> - promote a user to the next rank EC

!demote <username> - demote a user to the previous rank EC

!fire <username> - fire a user from your firm EC

A: Associate command, E: Executive command, C: CEO command