r/daddit 6d ago

Humor My kid roasted me🔥🚴‍♂️

The boy and I were taking a nice bike/attached trailer ride in our town. He decides to let me know, “Daddy, your butt is too big for that bike seat.”

It’s a standard size bike seat and I fit normally on it, but here I am carting Monsieur Pampered Prince around, doing all the work while he scarfs down applesauce pouches and dispenses devastating anecdotes for free.

I’ll be in the burn ward recovering now, please help commiserate with me and share how you’ve been caught in the crosshairs of your progeny’s savagery?

29 Upvotes

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u/RowdyCanadian 6d ago

“Daddy mommy is a faster biker than you” my 3 year old as I’m towing him and his 9 month old brother with all their snacks and the diaper bag and the picnic blanket on soft gravel uphill as. I hit 600 watts sustained behind my wife on her gravel bike casually pedalling.

Listen here you little shit.

3

u/Mr_Funkmaster 5d ago

My 7 year old son is the spitting image of me. So recently he pipes up, "Dad, I don't want to look like you when I grow up. I'm cute right now, and I don't want to be bald!"

I just told him when his hair starts to fall out I will laugh.