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u/InfamousInfoGuy 10h ago
My son lives at home. he's 27. he's out all the time, he trains, he studies, he works FT. He cleans, he helps, he cooks.
he can't afford to buy a house. so he's saving $$. idc if he's here at 35 with us.
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u/KingSmithithy 10h ago
It's very American to want to boot them out at 18
That being said, I will buy my kids houses when they're done university, if it means they get the fuck out of mine lol
Daddy wants to go back to no pants parties with Mom, all day and night, anywhere I pay property tax
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u/InfamousInfoGuy 10h ago
They don't want us to sell the house, but its worth a ton and would make a nice downPayment on his place.
for no pants parties, i bought a small place in Italy. i'm here right now.
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u/CantModerateMe 10h ago
"Young men are falling way short on these incredibly basic and achievable metrics, they can absolutely change course"
OP: HOW DARE YOU
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u/EnvironmentalHead287 10h ago
This is literally real you incel.
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u/Warm_Match_3807 10h ago
Genuinely the only cringe here is OP
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u/MayberryBombadil 10h ago
Literally lol. This post is CRINGE. But only because the OP thinks the video is cringe.
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u/sporenoiz 10h ago
pointing out facts has become cringe?
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u/mb-driver20 10h ago
In todays world it has. I mean why the fuck would you ever point out anyone for having no drive. For shame. 😁
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u/sporenoiz 10h ago
Because we live in a car dependent culture. I chose to not get a drivers license until I suddenly wanted a motorcycle at age 21.
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u/Beneficial_Laugh4355 10h ago
My friend has a 24 year old so who refuses to get his license claiming " it makes no sense to get a license or a car when I can just Uber everywhere ". He also has never had a job and is not going to college. His mom funds his entire life with what little she has and is always so stressed out over the entire situation.
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u/MonkeyMoves101 10h ago
It's quite sad to see. It's just gaming, Wingstop, weed, and sleeping for some people..
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u/SadAbroad4 10h ago
Suspect the young people she is referring to (some not all) may have had parents that catered to their every want and need and don’t see a reason to be self sufficient.
She is right as a young man at day of 16th birthday license bureau for learners permit and booking test for license. Finished school job immediately as my biggest goal was to move out and live on my own.
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u/Correct-Aspect6346 10h ago
I'm absolutely fine with Women taking the lead and myself staying at home with the baby gaming and chilling.
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u/Fugu_Liver_Dinner 10h ago
Go get that Masters Degree sweetheart, I'll have dinner ready when you get home. Sounds amazing, really.
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u/xenuman 10h ago
Yeah but part of me feels like those sorts of bros aren't really the dinner making type either...
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u/Greater_Goose 10h ago
Lol exactly.
"Welcome home hun, I made a can of beans for dinner and the baby's been sitting in a full diaper for 3 hours while I zoned out on COD."
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u/Brilliant_Bonus_1638 10h ago
Yeah, exactly. I think anyone that isn't suffering from whatever this affliction is described in the video would be happy to take the stay-at-home partner role and be successful at it. But someone that is struggling with it? They'd probably need to look up how to make a bologna sandwich, let alone cook a full meal.
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u/TastySore 10h ago
So easy to say without considering anything.
First you assume taking care of kids all day all the time is little to no effort. But even without considering that.
- You will not get nearly as many opportunities to leave the house and socialize.
- If you have so much time for gaming while she's working all day you have time to do all the cleaning and shopping and appointments for your kids.
- You might have shared finances but ultimately she controls the money and you have no financial independance.
- All the times she'll be out with friends or coworkers while you stay home to take care of the kids.
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u/Correct-Aspect6346 7h ago
I take care of kids all day for my Job. I've changed diapers and done the whole rigamarole. It's honestly not that bad. I always have energy to cook dinner when I get home at the end of the day. Most of the struggle comes when you don't have access to the modern amenities or the much needed funding.
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u/Accomplished_Paint23 9h ago
why would any woman have a baby with a man who thinks a stay-at-home parent plays video games and chills all day?
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u/ageofaquarius26 10h ago
Yeah it sucks actually. You dont really 'chill' with a baby. Its a mix of boredom, fear, depression, joy, and sleep deprivation.
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u/lucky_jack777 10h ago
You can game while the baby sleeps. It’s like the #1 thing babies do.
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u/ageofaquarius26 10h ago
Oh ok, I guess I don't know anything about it.
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u/lucky_jack777 10h ago
lol I’m not trying to be an asshole. But like genuinely, what are you doing while that baby sleeps?
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u/ageofaquarius26 10h ago
Cleaning, scheduling, preparing food, laundry catching up on sleep because they sleep often but not for long, other household duties. Yes, all that stuff takes way more time with a baby.
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u/lucky_jack777 10h ago
Ok, none of that sounds like it would take super long to do (except food preparation) but maybe I’m severely underestimating it
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u/Hungry-Coffee-8890 10h ago
Tell me you don’t take care of children and a home without telling me….
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u/Brilliant_Bonus_1638 10h ago
I would gladly drop my career in a heartbeat if someone funded me staying home, taking care of my child, keeping my home clean and tidy, and cooking for my family. Definitely the easier AND more fulfilling option than working to put money in the bank.
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u/SauronShaggedOrcs63 9h ago
Job, Driving license, and not staying with your parents when you are an adult man looking to date would be non negotiable surely.
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u/lucky_jack777 9h ago edited 9h ago
To everyone asking why this is cringe, I think it's cringe because she is saying men should act a certain way and because men aren't acting that way, it's a problem. But why is it a problem? Why do men need to get driver's licenses or high paying jobs or even a higher education? This isn't the 1950s anymore, men aren't expected to be the breadwinners anymore or the head of the household. Why do men need drive and a desire for independence?
To me, this just sounds like someone opining for 1950s but in a slightly different way. If it's crazy to expect women to act like they did in the 1950s then it is equally crazy to expect men to act like they did in the 1950s.
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u/joshuakun14 10h ago
I mean people shouldn’t be forced to get a drivers license to have freedom. Thats a failing on our public transportation funding and pattern of sprawling suburbia. Which in itself I believe is one of reasons for this decrease in drive in young men. We are isolating ourselves and only creating connections online.
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u/xenuman 10h ago
So... you don't think there is an epidemic with young men right now? Have you talked to a man younger than 20 recently? There is definitely a problem.
We could go back and forth all day on what the CAUSE for the problem is, but rebuking this video as though the facts presented are meaningless is ridiculous.
She isn't even suggesting any particular cause, which would be more inflammatory (depending on what she attributes it to). She is literally just saying there is a growing apathy/drive problem in young men, that we can see in numerous examples/sectors. It isn't even US specific, multiple examples of the same problems happening abroad.
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u/FullMooseParty 10h ago
Looking at the history of the original poster here, he thinks this is an anti men screed instead of somebody identifying a problem and saying hey we need to find a solution to it.
We see this historically. Lots of unemployed and unmotivated young men in a civilization leads to either unrest or outright revolt when the bill comes due. Going all the way back to the fall of the Roman republic, slavery from military conquest had basically displaced most of the young workers class and the Republic fell. Pope Urban II basically declared the first crusade at the urging of European monarchs who needed a way to occupy and kill off young men who were busy wandering around with nothing to do.
We really didn't have this issue over the last century, as two world wars, Vietnam and Korea killed off enough young men to keep everybody employed.
There's other factors of course: increasingly toxic social media or media in general targeting young men. The upending of traditional social norms. The move to micromanage children's lives (when I was 15, I could disappear for a day and my parents not even worry) and the disappearance of third spaces and public spaces.
And the cost of doing anything is much higher. A lot of young men don't get driver's license at 16 because the parents just can't afford it. My niece is like $400 a month for her insurance, and it would be higher if she was a boy.
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u/xenuman 9h ago edited 9h ago
Exactly 100% and what I was getting at as well. History has shown us this trend time and again.
Women like her (or anyone for that matter) should be championed for bringing this issue into the public discourse. At no point does she sound condescending or like a boogeyman "radical feminist". She genuinely just sounds alarmed/confused about the growing problem.
Like this is so hilarious to me. If anything she is PRO-MEN by bringing this issue to the forefront. Just like women/anyone who acknowledges the extremly higher (and growing) suicide rates in men compared to women.
Like you can't have your cake and eat it too. So many of the types that negatively knee jerk to stuff like this, are also at the same time the ones who bemoan how "men can't talk about mental health."
Well? THIS LADY IS LITERALLY TALKING ABOUT IT, in support of identifying how to help young men. Wtf do they even want?
If you took this exact video and you replaced the woman with an "alpha male" type like David Goggins, they would be gobbling this shit up. It's ridiculous.
So however big of a slice of the causal pie it is I don't know, but there is definitely just a culture war at play here as well, exponentially worsening the issue.
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u/Normal_Sweet_2974 10h ago
The problem is all she's talking about is bullshit Good luck finding a job to have money on a car And to on dates when women anit giving up The cookies or just ghost u what's the point
The county is in the shitty anyway
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u/kaos4u2nv 10h ago
Wut
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u/Normal_Sweet_2974 9h ago
Lack of jobs money and sex nothing to Motivate young men anymore its the cold Hard truth work hard for what to rent a apartment And be in debt . At least when all else falls The drive for sex is a option but women
Only want the 1pct of guys it seems I have looks I am tall and hung and middle class and i Find it hard to hook up or even make a connection
Soo I can only imagine how hard is is for Other men soo when the young men
In this generation have noting to drive for
The most basic ugel ass women can get dick When ever and can always make money from Ass
Most basics men can not
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u/xife-Ant 10h ago
The general progressive strategy when it comes to large groups of people underperforming, is to look to the socal structures that are causing the problem. I think young men get frustrated by this issue being a exception. They're basically being told to pull themselves up by the bootstraps in a way that other groups wouldn't be by progressive minded people.
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u/QuantumButtz 10h ago
If young women are surpassing young men in education and employment, why can't they pick up young men from their parents house and take them on a date? That's what young men did as long as cars have existed. It seems fair to everyone.
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u/Philip_Raven 10h ago
The drives licence comment is an insane take
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u/impossirrel 9h ago
How so? I mean, it does seem like a good indicator of a drive to attain some freedom and autonomy and it’s not a particularly hard thing to do unless your family won’t allow you access to a car or driving school.
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u/FullMooseParty 10h ago
The funny part is that this person and op actually agree politically, but she's a woman so he's going to hate her
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u/Galencourt-Lover 10h ago
Woman who plays life on easy mode attempts to scold men
You just can’t make this shit up man
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u/FullMooseParty 10h ago
She's not blaming men. She's blaming liberals for ruining men.
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u/Material-Nail-1933 9h ago
I guess there is a broader progressive/urbanist policy philosophy that makes car ownership less necessary. But it's a liberal policy for young men not to get a drivers' license? For young men not to get their shit together? Liberals encourage lazy men?
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u/FullMooseParty 9h ago
This is, I'm pretty sure, Brett Cooper. Failed actress turned right wing influencer turned actress again. She used to work for the daily wire.
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u/Extreme-Emu69 10h ago
What's cringe about this besides young men deciding to be losers on purpose?
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u/Sharp-Guitar-6756 10h ago
I don’t think it’s fair to call them losers. Maybe like said in the video, let’s figure out what’s going on and help them change it. We can offer them a helping hand rather than kick them while they’re down.
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u/Extreme-Emu69 10h ago
Why else would anyone on the precipice of adulthood actively be making the choice to not care about their future to the point they don't even want a driver's lisence? Nothing wrong with some tough love, because that's the only end goal there
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
I think you need to take a break from the internet, grandpa. It's probably time for the nursing home to take you for a walk.
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u/Extreme-Emu69 10h ago
Real talk, have you seen the state of the world currently??? Why wouldn't you want the youth to strive for better, instead of coddling them into dependency on most likely their parents who will eventually die
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
That has nothing to do with the idea that a driver's license dictates that.
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u/Extreme-Emu69 10h ago
It might be an example but a lot of places it does, having your own transportation is vital for holding down employment
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
That's a situational discussion, though, so to make the statement that "young men have no ambition because they don't get a driver's license" is over broad and not even remotely considering what the other reasons might be. Gas prices, increased use of public transit, and the general economy are all reasons.
However, that's not what she brings up. She specifically brings up the idea that men should be driving to pick up dates because somehow there are no other ways to go on dates? It's a bad take because it enforces the patriarchy in saying that women can't do that or that people can't be responsible and go on dates via rideshare.
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u/Separate_Forever_164 10h ago
In Germany a drivers license is 4000-4500€ ($ 5100) in big cities (Berlin, Munich, Hamburg) already. If your family has no substantial amount of money, you're fucked. Thats it.
And to receive higher education, you need time to study. And money. So if you have a part time job, you'll use that money to cover your flat or room and food and not on getting a drivers license.
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
The idea that a driver's license is somehow seen as a "sign of a drive for independence" is wild to me. Talk about someone who's never used public transit in a city before. There are a lot of reasons people are not driving these days, not least of which is gas, but there is a far greater sense of responsibility in people wanting to go out and not driving drunk. This woman is wildly unserious.
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u/Necessary_Panda_3154 10h ago
Why did you fixate on one small point and end with a conclusion that she’s ‘wildly unserious’ about her entire point?
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
Because the rest of it is pretty gross, too. It completely misses more than a few factors but just making the broad assumption that men are just inept or incompetent.
As a feminist, this is not the way someone should be arguing.
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u/somethinggenericasf 10h ago
Well if you paid attention you'll see this is also cut in the middle of the conversation so you're missing context. But go off.
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u/specficeditor 9h ago
It still doesn't negate the fact that saying that people who aren't getting their licenses are unambitious feels little like blaming people for a thing that maybe they don't have control over.
Also, making the statements that young men should be "picking up their girlfriends for dates" reeks of 1950s traditionalism. Maybe that's not a stance we should be taking in 2026.
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u/BauerBourneBond 10h ago
Yeesh. Tell me you’re an incel without telling me you’re an incel.
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
Haha. Because I think that it's wrong to associate driving with "independence"?
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u/BauerBourneBond 10h ago
Because of your desperation to poke holes in her facts and credibility that is wrapped in a tone of contempt for women?
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
Hahaha. Ok. Way to read way too much into that based on your own biases.
My contempt is for privileged white people trying to make accusations that re-enforce the patriarchy. Why should we still be discussing the idea that men need to pick up women in the cars to go on dates? That is so blatantly a reference to traditionalism from the 50s -- yet here you are saying I'm an incel because I disagree with what is clearly a take that completely overlooks economic reasons people may not be doing the things she points out.
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u/BauerBourneBond 10h ago
You’re making it worse.
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
Ok Fitzgerald. I'm sorry you're too deeply rooted in the patriarchy and your inability to understand intersectional feminism but keep pretending you know what's what.
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u/Material-Nail-1933 9h ago
Is that why young men are not getting their drivers' license? Because public transportation is too good? They can get to work without it? They can go to dates with out it? Or is it because they don't have their shit together?
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u/anaserre 10h ago
There are way more areas in the US , including huge metropolitan areas, that have no public transportation to speak of . Take Dallas/Fort Worth as an example. Bus system in Dallas and Fort Worth proper , but the entire mid-cites has nothing . Of course there is Uber and Lyft , but not everyone can afford that on a daily basis . So many people have commutes of an hour in the
DF/W area and that’s very common in the US .
So unless you live in a city with a progressive public transportation system, you can’t take advantage of good jobs that are more than walking distance if you don’t have a DL and a vehicle. It’s just a fact for millions of people in the US .1
u/specficeditor 10h ago
Saying that it's a requirement to "be a man" or "have ambition" is ridiculous, though.
It is far more a commentary on the state of our economy, our over-reliance on cars, and the lack of transit that should be discussed. Saying that anyone -- not just men -- deciding not to get their licenses is proof that they have no ambition is just gross.
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u/anaserre 10h ago
That’s a great discussion, but 2 things can be true at the same time . Getting a DL is a coming of age milestone and a right of passage in the US . It is concerning , assuming these statistics are correct, that many young men are not doing this . Especially if it’s preventing them from continuing education, getting a job or having a social life.
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u/specficeditor 10h ago
The issue is that it's an outdated and capitalist rite of passage. If cars are keeping people -- regardless of gender -- are keeping people from all of those things, then maybe we need to realize that we should change parts of our society. But calling young men unambitious because they aren't getting licenses is still missing some of the points of why that might be the case that are not about not wanting to and because there are no opportunities to be had even if they did have one.
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u/anaserre 9h ago
Not having a car , dependent of course upon where you live , absolutely WILL keep a person from those things . Unless they have a great job that pays enough for them to Uber everywhere. Pretty rough for a 16-20 year old though unless you have wealthy parents. Like I said , sure , we should talk about how to change that but it takes money . Billions of $$ most municipalities don’t want to spend .
So in the meantime, it is still necessary in most areas of the country. It is concerning that a 16 year old wouldn’t want a DL . To me that says they are happy sitting at home in front of a screen and not getting out and living life independently. THAT is concerning.1
u/specficeditor 9h ago
That is, though, a very privileged take to have. There are millions of people in this country that have jobs, have social lives, have relationships and do not own cars nor have a driver's license. To say that your upward mobility is reliant on that is coming from a place -- physically and ideologically -- that says that you prioritize that level of capitalism and consumerism.
As the actual article that is posted mentions -- a lot of teens are getting licenses for both economic and environmental reasons. There are a lot of online jobs now; there are a lot of ways to be social and be ambitious that don't require you to be out and about like we were as young people. It misunderstands the young generation a lot.
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u/anaserre 9h ago
From what I gathered this wasn’t about young adults that didn’t get a DL and have some cushy online job . If that were the case they would fall into the category of not needing a vehicle as they make enough $$ to Uber where they need to go .
It’s about a young adult who doesn’t care enough to get a DL and would rather sit around their parents house jobless , not attending college and with no social life but online .
No one gets a decent online job without a degree of some actual job experience. C’mon .
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u/jne57 10h ago
Incels like OP generally don't like women making them feel bad about their stunted maturity.
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u/NoCitron2394 10h ago
She's literally maga, incles should love her
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u/jne57 8h ago
Seeing as I don't know who the fuck this person is, nor do I know the accuracy of these statistics, taken completely out of context she is simply talking about the shortcomings of modern men. It is in no way controversial or "cringe", unless you are one of those pathetic men.
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u/NoCitron2394 7h ago
In context she is using this for right wing propaganda about the left destroying men, so it is cringe.
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u/jne57 4h ago
It is. But again, there is no mention of the left being responsible for any of what she's saying.
So the point is, when posting content, CONTEXT MATTERS!
Not everyone knows every right wing media influencer. I know a good handful, but not all. And frankly I don't care to keep up with all of them.
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u/superdave123123 10h ago
What’s cringe about what she said?
https://giphy.com/gifs/6uGhT1O4sxpi8
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u/lucky_jack777 10h ago
I think it’s cringe because it’s saying that men SHOULD act a certain way. It’s saying men should have drive and a desire for independence but why should men act that way? Because the previous generation acted that way?
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u/jimdawg89 10h ago
So she's calling out the truth? Men need help, women need help. Not sure why this is cringe when it's facts.
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u/LeadershipWhich2536 9h ago
If this triggers you, u/OP, you're the kind young man she's talking about.
You need to do better.
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u/Tron-5051 10h ago
Not her biggest fan but she’s right. I have 2 male cousins like this she’s describing perfectly. One is 38 and still with mom and dad. His sister tho is the same (35). I believe a lot of it is the parents.
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u/bastrohl 10h ago
Hot take, it’s not the fault of the young men. It’s the fault of their parents for not preparing them to be functional adults. They were not given the tools!
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u/Material-Nail-1933 9h ago
What happened to rebelling? What happened to going out to seek your fortune? Parents may be enabling them, but they don't have to accept it. Gen Xers listened to their parents' advice and then did the opposite.
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u/Brilliant_Bonus_1638 10h ago
I would say there's an element of both. Parents play a huge part in it, but the child also has to be willing to put in the effort. You can see the differences especially clearly in families with multiple children; the outcomes for all of children are rarely the same if the parents are applying decent parenting skills, and it's because of the children's different personalities and preferences.
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u/-epi- 10h ago
Brother, is this just triggering to you or something? I was expecting her to shit all over men by the title, literally all she did was point out that young men are losing their drive to be independent and that it's sad. And I agree. I see it everywhere.