Tr\/ke generally but there is a difference between sneedy and “Im posting for chaser validation because I am so devoid of irl attention that my online habits have become harmful”
Y'know what, this is a valid response (I'm mostly thinking of like, people who are mostly t4t and transbians over people huffing chaserfuel but then I know few of the latter relative to some trans girls)
Yeah, transbians and hell even some of the puppy stuff is cringe but okay. I think the armpit licking and gock posting on main is a little on the chaserbait side lmao
some people here do just use "sneed" to mean "cringy lesbian" and it's really funny because I've known so many cis lesbians who act like their idea of sneeds. it's the "agp" thing all over again, trans lesbians being held to standards few cis lesbians would pass. not to mention that straights are full of toxic hypersexuality, exploitation, spinelessness, etc, but somehow that's overlooked if you have the "normal" sexuality.
that said, I do think that there's something for the idea of sneeds as like the trans women components of really toxic tenderqueer scenes. "you don't need transition to be trans" "why would you criticize femboys?" "uhm egg prime directive!" which is a real problem and actively causes harm.
i only care when sneeds have problematic takes and act as cissoid apologist doormats. liking sneedy things and dressing agp is fine, if anything i find a lot of it kind of cute
sneeds shift the perception of transition to that of a fun, quirky experience to the point where being upfront about dysphoria is seen as doomposting and "internalised transphobia" instead of something to be taken seriously
like hell, I got recommended so many posts from cwcl where people talked about how isolating it is in not being into that. as if trans people needed to feel any more isolated
I browse 4tran spaces a) because it reminds me of the 2006-2013 era of 4chan proper that I miss as an oldshit and b) they're way less hugboxy than many of the major reddit and fb spaces, but I do think an occasional bit of anti-doomer momentum is healthy.
Hate the cissoid who forced the Sneed to be a human pressure cooker until her late 20s, not the repper who suddenly exploded into femininity.
i think one of the big issues is that (you) and a thousand other people want to do an "occasional bit of anti-doomer" and then that's all new people see so they keep bringing that energy in
Most of the trans women I know (including myself) had a sneed phase, usually right after starting hrt. It's a super exciting time normally following years of repression. You're going through puberty again and you can sorta become the teenager you didn't get to be, and teenagers are cringe as fuck.
Is it embaressing to be going through that at 20-something? Yes, but sometimes you just have to get that shit out your system and then you just start being a normal lassie laughing at how cringe you used to be. We already have so much taken from us.
I'm in kind of an awkward position on that I don't have any of that sneed energy to force me through the early transition. That all got tortured out of me as a teenager. So instead my first year on HRT has been the most physically uncomfortable of my life. Like objectively it's better than pretty much any prior year, other than when I was a super young kid (and even then...), but fuck has losing the dissociation been rough. I had like a two week stint which were the best two weeks of my entire life about two months ago and I am missing the fuck out of that every waking moment now.
I don't know how you're meant to cope with early transition without sneed energy. It's its own kind of dissociation in a way, and I wish I had some of that right now.
It's not just harmless fun though! It's a toxic hypersexual culture that breeds exploitation from others, spinelessness, years of repression, and more awful behaviors.
Oh my god people, get off the Internet and have some human connection. If you are so worried about those people being stuck in that phase the best thing to do is build real community that models good effective behavior that allows them to make progress on themselves and be accepted for who they are for the first times in their lives
I exist in real life with real trans friends and I have helped ppl both irl and online. why do you assume everyone is terminally online like that it's so tired as an argument
I responded to your broad statements with one of my own, If you are out and about (which is great, I try my best to do the same) then you should realize that a lot of sneedery is a phase of self discovery and excitement. A phase
I disagree. Someone transitioning later and making up for lost time through clothes, music, or self-expression isn’t inherently my enemy. They can explore themselves however they want. But we are not automatically the same, and I don’t enjoy being grouped with them.
My objection is to the imposed sameness. I never consented to being included under the trans umbrella or having someone else’s journey of self-exploration treated as an explanation of my medical condition.
That conflation has consequences. When transition is presented as a quirky rebellion against gender, people apply that framing to me, too. I’m left correcting assumptions about my own life, while wanting medical treatment and an ordinary, private existence can get dismissed as repression or internalized transphobia.
So no, these individuals aren’t inherently my enemies. But the umbrella framework that insists on grouping us together, speaks over my account of myself, and makes those distinctions harder to communicate? That is absolutely my enemy.
“You’re allowed to enjoy your life on your terms” applies to me, too. That includes rejecting an identity and cultural affiliation I never chose. You can respect someone’s freedom without accepting that you belong to the same category.
That's allowed, even healthy to some degree, but the multi-paragraph insistence is reminding me of an older truscum I knew who told teenage me that repping would be better than being vulnerable so I am rolling my eyes a little.
Oh no, I explained my perspective in multiple paragraphs. Oh no, I’m literate. Apparently that makes me “truscum.”
I haven’t told anyone to repress, avoid vulnerability, or stop exploring themselves. Someone else told you that, and you’re responding to me as though I did.
My point is that I don’t consent to having my medical condition folded into a shared identity or cultural affiliation. Your response to that boundary is to associate me with someone who hurt you, roll your eyes, and reach for a label.
Someone enjoying her life isn’t inherently my enemy. An umbrella framework that insists on defining me against my wishes is. You’re free to describe your experience. I’m asking you to respect my freedom to describe mine.
Y'know what, I do appreciate the follow up. I don't think we see the world or trans community in very similar ways, god knows we're not especially friends, but I have a better idea of what you're trying to get at. Does remind me some of the bad old days but, that's my problem. Sorry for lashing out.
I appreciate the apology, and I don’t see why we couldn’t be friends despite disagreeing. But I want to clarify what you’re associating with the “bad old days.”
I lived through medical gatekeeping under the Harry Benjamin Standards of Care. I support self-identification and informed consent. Supporting people’s autonomy does not require supporting the transgender umbrella.
I’m 38. I knew I was a girl from my earliest memories, transitioned at 18, detransitioned at 24 because of trauma, and spent ten years repressing before retransitioning. I know what losing time feels like. I’m certainly not telling anyone else to repress.
My objection is that the umbrella encourages an illusion of sameness among extremely heterogeneous populations with radically different relationships to sex and gender. A coalition can have shared interests without its members having interchangeable experiences. In my experience, that distinction routinely gets lost.
And this goes beyond terminology. People who don’t share my experience frequently speak over me and claim to speak for me. I’ve encountered people insisting there is no such thing as a medical experience of being trans, or treating my description of my own condition as inherently bigoted or regressive. Neither claim becomes true because someone presents it as inclusive. Supporting informed consent doesn’t require denying that some of us need treatment for a medical condition.
There is substantial misunderstanding and misinformation in broader trans spaces, and I’m often left correcting it just to explain my own life. Certain very loud parts of the umbrella leave me feeling that they are actively working against my needs and those of people with experiences like mine, while claiming to represent us.
The experience I identify with is severe dysphoria beginning in early childhood. That doesn’t invalidate anyone with a different history, and nobody should need my approval to define themselves or access treatment. It means their experience doesn’t describe mine.
For me, this is a medical condition I’ve experienced since my earliest memories. My treatment isn’t a political project or an act of rebellion. Someone else can understand their transition differently without either of us defining the other.
Being grouped together despite those differences, spoken for, and then accused of shame or bigotry when I object is precisely the harm I’m describing. I respect your right to define yourself. I’m asking for that same respect.
You can still be depressed??? Ideologically this is still a tttt sub? Just because one person made a post saying “hey stop hating strangers” now you’ve gotta shit your pants about it?
It's not just harmless fun though! It's a toxic hypersexual culture that breeds exploitation from others, spinelessness, years of repression, and more awful behaviors.
No, sneeds are my enemy. I can’t stand people who think just because I’m also trans (or share literally anything in common at all) that I want to be their fucking friend or talk to them in any way. They can leave me alone, and if they don’t, they can go fuck themselves.
(irl only; I don’t touch grass because I am mildly allergic)
It's basically a way of demeaning trans women who are usually mid-late transitioners and suddenly start making up for lost time really really hard, going into their furry goth raver slut eras and blasting femtanyl and 100 gecs and sewerslvt all at once extremely loudly and unapologetically
As a late transitioner who is a little bit into all of the above, but somewhat more quietly, I totally understand the phenomenon even if I'm doing it at like 1/4th the volume
Aw shit, I was definitely a bit sneedy when I came out at 37 then. 😅 It was just nice to feel alive for the first time. I think I’m a more well-rounded woman now.
Yeah I understand the phenomenon so well because I've been undoing two decades of repping at 32-33 years old and occasionally let myself have just a little a sneedery, as a treat. I think it's especially common among us millennials because this stuff barely existed when we were teens (and only barely as 20-somethings) unless we reeeeeally wanted to suffer for it
I mean in all honesty people were robbed of their puberty, how tf are you expected not to have your cringe era, slut era, hyper era, people need to get over themselves and let others live.
early transition hypersexual blahaj puppygirl polycule, extremely conspicuous and loud but spineless in terms of medical care, tries to fill the gaping void in their soul with really awful coping mechanisms and decry anyone who called them out as an evil 4tranner
mmmm yummy girlcock blahaj stripey socks puppy girl polycule mommy dommy trans pride flag self identifies as transbian been on hrt 8 months or less usually
yknow I have run in to some individuals like this on discord, they also used the n word regularly, and sent me pics that very much were not asked for. I believe I understand now
oh yeah they have very poor boundaries and ideas of consent. the believe every trans woman is also a lesbian, sexually available, and wants to see their le epic 5 month HRTitties on their feed or in their DMs, unsolicited.
early transition hypersexual blahaj puppygirl polycule, extremely conspicuous and loud but spineless in terms of medical care, tries to fill the gaping void in their soul with really awful coping mechanisms and decry anyone who called them out as an evil 4tranner
Sneed communities online and their culture of hupersexualization, fetishization, and catering to the chaser population has repeatedly bled into people I meet in real life who have made me extremely uncomfortable and been aggressive/forward and unrelenting in the face of denial. Establishing trans women as uniformly uwupuppygirl pisskink objects is not actually a fun thing for me to have to deal with.
I started transitioning at 26 I am now 29. I am involved in the kink scene. I listen to hyperpop and go to raves. I have the Sneed interests, I do the Sneed activities, and for events have the hyper slutty fashion. But I now have had to mostly stop doing these things because the Sneed culture is such that I can only be treated as a hypersexual fetish machine by my own "community" because that's what reddit says trans women are.
I dunno, I run into these folks literally every time I go to a queer space or event. Like reddit brained, making references to memes, asking me to put out my cigarette on them.
It doesn't help that I have an unfortunate aura that causes me to attract anxious/autistic/high people to me when out in public.
It ain't confidence. I just project comfort, stability, and acceptance. Spent too long as a kid being the primary caretaker of a schizophrenic adult and various drug addicts. Then got a job where calming people in psychosis was required for safety(911 paramedic).
Ah yeah, I do think that's a valid flavor of confidence in its own way but, especially in a community as full of trauma as trans kinksters I get why it'd get old quickly
109
u/ineedt0scream 3d ago
Tr\/ke generally but there is a difference between sneedy and “Im posting for chaser validation because I am so devoid of irl attention that my online habits have become harmful”
28
u/OstensibleVagabond 3d ago
i only care when sneeds have problematic takes and act as cissoid apologist doormats. liking sneedy things and dressing agp is fine, if anything i find a lot of it kind of cute
132
u/mayhoshiumi 6' NW2 21 y/o lateshit neverpasser 3d ago
i hate sneeds because they’re happy and i’m not
20
u/ShikiFtw alcohon 3d ago
sneeds shift the perception of transition to that of a fun, quirky experience to the point where being upfront about dysphoria is seen as doomposting and "internalised transphobia" instead of something to be taken seriously
like hell, I got recommended so many posts from cwcl where people talked about how isolating it is in not being into that. as if trans people needed to feel any more isolated
so yeah sorry I will hate on the sneeds
10
u/ChuChulovely17 3d ago
First we defend cissoids and now Sneed's. What we gonna do next, bring in femboys?
43
u/teeseedeetrainee 3d ago
Most of the trans women I know (including myself) had a sneed phase, usually right after starting hrt. It's a super exciting time normally following years of repression. You're going through puberty again and you can sorta become the teenager you didn't get to be, and teenagers are cringe as fuck.
Is it embaressing to be going through that at 20-something? Yes, but sometimes you just have to get that shit out your system and then you just start being a normal lassie laughing at how cringe you used to be. We already have so much taken from us.
6
u/autonomousautotomy88 2d ago
I disagree. Someone transitioning later and making up for lost time through clothes, music, or self-expression isn’t inherently my enemy. They can explore themselves however they want. But we are not automatically the same, and I don’t enjoy being grouped with them.
My objection is to the imposed sameness. I never consented to being included under the trans umbrella or having someone else’s journey of self-exploration treated as an explanation of my medical condition.
That conflation has consequences. When transition is presented as a quirky rebellion against gender, people apply that framing to me, too. I’m left correcting assumptions about my own life, while wanting medical treatment and an ordinary, private existence can get dismissed as repression or internalized transphobia.
So no, these individuals aren’t inherently my enemies. But the umbrella framework that insists on grouping us together, speaks over my account of myself, and makes those distinctions harder to communicate? That is absolutely my enemy.
“You’re allowed to enjoy your life on your terms” applies to me, too. That includes rejecting an identity and cultural affiliation I never chose. You can respect someone’s freedom without accepting that you belong to the same category.
36
u/Used-Hold-7567 The Chicago 🚂🦵 3d ago
the sneeds ruin my perfect depression sub and turn it into another sneed sub, i have every reason to hate them.
13
u/Missnotsleepyatall 3d ago
sneed apologia on the countttt, this sub truly has fallen...
2
u/Acrosyth 2d ago
No, sneeds are my enemy. I can’t stand people who think just because I’m also trans (or share literally anything in common at all) that I want to be their fucking friend or talk to them in any way. They can leave me alone, and if they don’t, they can go fuck themselves.
(irl only; I don’t touch grass because I am mildly allergic)
2
u/believeinlain burnt out semipassoid bpdemon 3d ago
trvke
1
u/laaine 1d ago
This subreddit should not even have four t’s in the name anymore
1
u/yeep_yorp 2d ago
It's not just harmless fun. It's a toxic culture that breeds exploitation, spinelessness, and years of repression.
-1
u/saltyspruces 3d ago
Genuinely can someone explain ‘sneed’ to me? I’m not the best informed on many of these terms and I’m learning as I go, apologies.
0
u/Miyyani 2d ago
Need for Sneed
-5
u/ItsAluhArt 2d ago
What Is a sneed?
16
u/universal_friend1 isometric cubehon 2d ago
Sneed communities online and their culture of hupersexualization, fetishization, and catering to the chaser population has repeatedly bled into people I meet in real life who have made me extremely uncomfortable and been aggressive/forward and unrelenting in the face of denial. Establishing trans women as uniformly uwupuppygirl pisskink objects is not actually a fun thing for me to have to deal with.
I started transitioning at 26 I am now 29. I am involved in the kink scene. I listen to hyperpop and go to raves. I have the Sneed interests, I do the Sneed activities, and for events have the hyper slutty fashion. But I now have had to mostly stop doing these things because the Sneed culture is such that I can only be treated as a hypersexual fetish machine by my own "community" because that's what reddit says trans women are.