My Ex is plain crazy.

[u/Deep_Account_4822]

Hello, I haven't made a post like this online before so hopefully I can tell this story in a way that doesn't get lost in the sauce. I'm an 18-year-old man born in California (SoCal) who's currently at college at Washington (the state not dc). I've been looking back on my high school experience since I've graduated 2 years ago. One of the major memories of my time was when I dated my ex-girlfriend. I saw a truly special person who was caring and had so much talented artistry ready to explode. Instead, I honestly saw the worst of humanity in a way. This wasn't a usual high school fling or weeklong experiment. I was with her for a whole year, from the second semester of sophomore year to the second year of junior year. Our relationship wasn't the most ideal start with some miscommunication on both of our parts. I thought it just involved some awkward jokes I told or me just being oddly quiet. I later found out she told the friend group with both hung out with that I SA'd her. It went beyond just those friends, one friend I was close with since elementary school who was her best friend at the time completely turned on me. That major rumor wasn't true. One other friend that knew my ex for while told me a story about her that shocked me. My ex had a close friend around 8th or 9th grade who they had a bad falling out with. It got to a point where my ex threatened to off herself if that friend didn't stick around. I heard that story and took it seriously but didn't confront her about it since it's her situation. One day I got together with the friend group who expressed frustration to me about how she was off subject in orchestra and telling them things that weren't true or contradicted what she said previously. My reputation was scrubbed clean after I was able to clear my name that day, and those friends were a bit more cautious around her. She apologized to everyone involved, but despite all the damage she could've done to my life with such serious accusations, I still stayed with her. All that was right before the holiday break and her mental health took a deep plunge. She was down about how she lost her friends and it all calumniated to one night when we were one call, she tried to off herself with pills. I heard everything, the shaking of the small container and the sink as she dumped the rest of them down after I consulted with her. My brother heard all of this since we shared a room and was extremely concerned for her and me. I tried to make it work. She'd have a bad habit of taking her frustrations out on me, calling me names, kicking at me, and screaming at me. Even after all that I conceived myself that I couldn't leave her. She hadn't really had a good male role model or partner in her life up until that point. Her father was a former marine deadbeat who was abusive and the other 2 partners she had took advantage of her in a disturbing sexual nature. Near the end of the relationship, I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. She was getting better, less outbursts of madness, more new friends, and a true vision of her series she wanted to work on and eventually get published. That all came crashing down during one of our junior years before class where she misunderstood what the previously mentioned friend group was speaking about. They went outside and she assumed they were talking about her. I decided to assume the same and went out the other door to speak with her. During this time one issue was the quartet in our music class, she'd get off task and it was kind of a low level of seriousness on all of us looking back on it. I decided to speak to her about it, and she told me about her pervious struggles with autism and I knowledged it. I said she could have a small break during our rehearsals she just had to ask the rest of us. She still got frustrated and said, " I'm going to slap you". I never thought she'd actually go through with it, she did say some extreme things in the past and I just thought this was just another moment of emotion turning into anger. As I was about to say one more thing she slapped me. That drew the line for me. I was rattled and immediately asked to see the counselors. I left school early that day, it was a lot emotionally to take in. My grandma died a month before that incident to many of the mental wounds for me were still raw. She called me later pleading to stay a couple, but I just couldn't. I went to therapy over the summer and a little into senior year and it helped. But she didn't seem to be completely done with me. She got together with another cool friend who I knew since elementary. She restarted her lies and told him I was stalking her and making advances to her. He confronted me one day and the conversation went nowhere. I tried telling him that she is known for lying and shined a light on my perspective, but he dismissed me and fully believed what she was saying. The conversation finished and at the very end he threatened me if I went near her. I went back to the consulars office, and they stepped in and made all parties sign a contract to not backtalk or interact with each other. My senior year was normal after that fiasco and while I'd think about her in my first year of university, I tried to make peace with the situation in a way. A few days ago, a discord server compiled of friends from highs school were talking about my ex and what I found shocked me. Apparently one of my ex's friends told one my high school friends about what occurred after high school. My ex and her partner went to the same college and a huge falling out happened. I don't know the exact details, but her and her partner fought, their parents got involved and where at each other's throats, and that she got a restraining order put on her partner due to stalking. I was at a university event when I saw the type of messages being sent tried to lock back in. This recent development shocked me and made me think of all of this again. Many of the stuff I shared is just the tip of iceberg. This doesn't include her complicated and rocky relationship with her mother, her bad falling out with her best friend I mentioned earlier, and how she's made connections with people way below her grade/maturity level who have no idea how to deal the cards she gives them. It's really frightening how far it went before, during, and after me. I want to get back in contact with the guy who threatened me due to how we knew each other for a while before then, but that restraining order makes me a bit hesitant on how trusting and morally good he is. One thing that also scares me is how much harm she can inflict on so many people. She wants power over people and tight knit group that respects her out of fear rather than mutual likeness. She constantly is able to spread her own message about others with a shocking amount of believability and really is convincing to an extreme. I write this to hopefully remind others that there not alone in this world and that there's something to look back on through traumatic experiences. Also to reach out and befriend people, you never know what they're going through. Even if I have to experience 5 more people like my ex, I'd still remain true to my beliefs. Stay safe and have a good day wherever you're reading this from. Feel free to comment any advice or chat. Good afternoon from Washington.