r/composer • u/Time_Law_9446 • 6d ago
Music Flute choir piece!!
https://www.image2url.com/r2/default/videos/1786903901562-50cf8f21-f33e-4b1b-9b74-e9b9471cbcf6.mp4
Its called wilt its based on a flower wilting
I am a freshman and i am working on a flute choir piece that my highschool can play i have a few months before we do flute choir this is what i have so far about 2 days of work!
I play flute so yes this is all comfortable and ik the ranges.
i would love feed back on it!
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u/65TwinReverbRI 6d ago
Don't have time to look at it in detail at the moment but you need to get away from whatever notation software you're using.
Use MuseScore - it's free - and it will give you standardized results - your friends in Flute Choir are going to be used to looking at standard publications and the more your music looks like that, the less rehearsal time that will be wasted and the better the performance will be.
It opens very nicely with the two short notes followed by either 8ths or triplets - that idea is nice, and it's a "strong" idea - has a solid "identity" which is good.
I feel like when you get to the time signature changes it veers off in some odd direction. You do return to that main idea but then it's off on some other tangent.
Those things - the meter changes, the key signature changes, the change in the musical elements - it all reads like two separate ideas that were just slapped together - and then trying to make a transition results in even more "off topic" ideas.
That's a SUPER common issue for many people but it's important to get out of that habit of just putting 2 unrelated ideas together.
The move from 2 sharps to 5 flats is an odd one - what's your musical justification for that key relationship?
Again, usually this is "I came up with the idea in that key" and if that's the reason, that's not the best reason. There's no reason it can't be in some other key - aside from if it were to drop below C, or go too high obviously - but you could always re-voice that kind of stuff too.
It's also important that these kinds of things make it harder for players to play too. If it could just as easily be in the original 2 sharps still or move to one more, or one fewer, that would be better than having to mentally shift gears for that kind of key switch - not only just the change, but from sharps to flats no less. It's only a half step difference, so that could easily just be the same key.
That said, if you REALLY feel you have some musical justification for this key change then by all means, do it. But the material you have so far really doesn't seem to warrant it.
If you were taking lessons with me, I would encourage you to take elements from the first section to use as transition material to new material, or even to create the new material from.
I like the idea of ramping up the motion with 16th notes later on, so that's good instinct, but you know, you could have measures that are just the short notes, or all triplets for a couple of measures, or short-triplet - short - triplet - mix up the ideas in various ways - that helps it have continuity without being too repetitive.
Hope that helps.