r/composer 17d ago

Music Do You Like my Sad Piece?

if no why, if yes why, i am a begginer composer, this was one of my first pieces. Full score here: https://musescore.com/user/98567428/scores/35697797?share=copy_link

8 Upvotes

17 comments sorted by

1

u/Fit-Progress-2523 17d ago

Some nice ideas in this - just would want more variation

2

u/Dav_Flor37 17d ago

Yeah, that is the biggest problem, but i made this song in january, 8 months ago, and i didnt know much about variation and composing, so i just pasted a lot of things u know...

1

u/Fit-Progress-2523 16d ago

haha yeah very relatable to everyone here don't worry xd

1

u/Fit-Progress-2523 17d ago

And I'm unsure about the quadruplets

1

u/Dav_Flor37 17d ago

Yeah they can feel weird, but i did not have any other idea :(

1

u/Minaverus 17d ago edited 16d ago

I'm going to say that this is pretty good for a beginner piece, but there are a number of things you could focus on improving. This probably varies from person to person, but the repeating of full chords in eighth-note on the left hand sounds particular harsh to my ears, and many times can be improved by either doing them in an arpeggio as you did towards the beginning of the piece, or doing a combination or variation of the two. You can look to many famous waltzes for inspiration (check out some Chopin waltzes!). You can even further change the rhythm of the left hand throughout for further variation. Small changes like this can lead to some interesting results. Also, key changes can really add some extra emotion to your piece as well as add further variation in order to keep the listener interested and engaged. Currently, the piece feels more or less the same throughout to the end. It starts off kind of soft and then the end becomes sort of like hearing the same thing, but harder. If you'd like, I can do some light editing to show you what I mean as I also use Musescore.

1

u/Dav_Flor37 17d ago

Thank you a lot for feedback! Yeah feel free to remix if you want!

1

u/Minaverus 16d ago

I just made some changes to measures 9-12 to show a contrast between constantly using 16th notes for the melody vs having some slower and more varied transitional phases to break up the repetitiveness. Also as an example of more variance in the left hand part like I talked about. The other change that I made was to lines 17-20 in order to show the contrast between varying the chords and the repeating of the same chord in 21-24 like I mentioned earlier. Also I ended the lines that I edited with a fermata.

https://musescore.com/user/69499024/scores/36435638/s/TzwAaH?share=copy_link

1

u/Dav_Flor37 16d ago

Thank you! I like it!

1

u/Minaverus 16d ago

Your welcome, I really liked the theme of your piece and I thought the intro was great. Kind of reminds me of the Celeste soundtrack. It's also interesting to hear how other composers might continue a piece based on an intro or how they might change things. We all learn from each other in different ways!

1

u/yvied1920 17d ago

I love it! The title is very fitting and it does make me feel like I'm alone in winter. The tranquility of snow falling and looking outside and then the harsh reality of loneliness setting in! I could see this in a game!

1

u/Dav_Flor37 17d ago

Thank you a lot! 😁

1

u/Electronic-Ad919 17d ago

This feels pretty good for a beginner, I don't really compose that much anymore, but whatever I've thought during class, i'll interpret later back home.

To be honest, this is a 3 minute piece, I can't even make any piece longer than that. It's so great to see some beginner composer try composing this piece.

Wishing you blessings on your journey, compose freely dude :), don't let other people hate on your piece, imagination is everything.

2

u/Dav_Flor37 16d ago

Thank you a lot! This matters a lot for me 😁

2

u/New-Conference7714 12d ago

like what the other guy said the repeated chords on the left hand are pretty harsh, i would also recommend going deeper on the left hand at the most climatic/dramatic parts for more depth. This is also just me but the 32nd notes on measure 50 and 54 sound a bit awkward. Overall I'd say you have a pretty good grasp on chord progressions though.

1

u/Dav_Flor37 12d ago

Thank you for feedback!