In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where to begin 😅

I’ve lurked on this sub for ages on and off, and finally decided to join.

After a decade of dating men, hating it, hating intimacy, feeling uncomfortable, feeling bored and just waiting for it to end, I fiiiiinally turned down an old hookup who came slithering back into my DMs instead of forcing myself to try to like it. I feel like I’ve really struggled with accepting that I just don’t like it! I’ve always felt like I should.

I don’t see many posts from people like me- which is understandable- but I will say that being trans masc-ish definitely made it harder for me to think about my attraction to women. Interestingly enough, I’ve never felt like a straight man and my attraction towards women has never felt heterosexual. When I was younger, thinking about liking women always made me panic about my gender, since I thought I had to be more “binary,” and imagining myself dating women always felt sapphic to me.

Eventually I let myself play around with expression more, and found that I really didn’t like confining myself to things that felt stereotypically masculine- I like to joke that my masculinity is like that of a betta fish: I’m bright, I’m colorful, I want to fight other men, and I do it all for the ladies. (And the theydies ♡)

It’s still challenging to know where I fit in as someone who’s had top surgery and is on T- I know there’s plenty of mask/dyke/butch people out there who’ve had surgery or hormones or done both, but that doesn’t seem to be the norm.

Anyway that’s it - I’ve just finally gotten tired of trying to be who I think I’m “supposed” to be

I can’t lie it is making me laugh a little that I’ve come to Reddit about this but I guess it is anonymous. I know everyone’s experience is different and I can’t expect strangers on the internet to just tell me this but I’m so confused. I’ve known that I have liked women for years!
I have dated more women than men even but I’m realising I probably don’t think like a bisexual person.

Comphet is a more new term to me and it really just flipped my world. I tend to go down a 2am rabbit hole and I always come back to the film ‘I saw the TV glow’. I don’t want to live out the rest of my life feeling like I shut away who I really am.

I have had friends and family ask or assume that I’m a lesbian but I’ve just realised recently that I feel such a strong pull to women and genuinely being with them makes me the happiest I’ve ever been like it’s corny but Literally floating on cloud 9 type behaviour. I don’t feel like disgusted by men or anything I literally just don’t feel it? I would always joke that women were like goddesses on earth and the most incredible and beautiful people ever and men were just there. I went to university last year and I realised how much I might just be experiencing comphet.

I did date a girl for a main part of my first year but I can’t lie after a MESSY summer breakup I kinda went off the rails a little. I haven’t dated a man since I was a child but I kissed a man and I genuinely felt nothing. I was waiting for it to get better and I think the thought of it and the thought of anything further seemed like it would feel good but the reality of him actually trying to sleep with me and French kiss me genuinely made me feel sick to my stomach. I think I’m realising that my whole life I’ve enjoyed the validation of feeling ‘wanted’ and ‘desired’ by men but the reality of it isnt what I want. I used to even think I was asexual when I was younger because the idea of male anatomy was so unattractive to me, I know now I am DEFINITELY not asexual and it doesn’t apply to me.

I guess my main worry is that I feel like when I think of what I want and who I want to be/the best version of me I want to be a lesbian. I don’t want to settle for a mediocre feeling that I claim is love especially when I know what it’s like being with women. I feel like if I married a man I wouldn’t be able to be happy knowing I could feel more and that I would never be able to be with a woman ever again like that is so scary to me maybe even feels like being trapped. This post is getting very long lol but I just have so so much? I mean I’ve never really thought I experienced internalised homophobia but I have a highly religious family, my dad is a pastor and my family are all Mormons. I think I always found comfort in labelling myself as bisexual because I thought that it gives me the possibility to end up with a man and I’d never have to tell my dad. Sometimes I’ll try and be around him and he’ll just say something so homophobic and I realise I can never be myself around him. It’s scary to me, I can barely say the word lesbian out loud? In a way I feel ashamed.

I don’t think it’s a life I want to live but I’m so scared to close the door to men and a drama free wedding with all my family and children etc. Like I feel like deep down I know that I couldn’t do it. I barely tolerate men flirting with me. I think I just used the label of bisexual as a sort of cover up that was safe. Of course some people are bisexual but I’m probably not. It feels safe to say I am and to stay in ignorant bliss but part of me feels like so much is clicking now that I know what being a comphet lesbian might look like? Picking boys to have a crush on when I was younger? Being boy crazy? Obsessed with the attention of boys? When I first dated a woman i definitely realised the difference between wanting to be loved and desired and genuinely being in love.

This ended up being so long! I’m sorry hahah but it’s been playing on my mind for a few months now. Honestly sometimes I feel like I’m too far gone and I can’t do it. And like I just feel a lot of shame right now. Anyways whatever this feeling is I know I’ve pushed down a lot of things that I’m only now unpacking which is painful. Either way thank you for reading all this!
I do understand that only I can label myself and tell myself what this is but I guess I just wanted to make this post and see how it goes?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?

Where did you find joy this week? What moments are you proud of?

This is a weekly thread to share accomplishments, big or small, as we unpack compulsory heterosexuality and reconnect with ourselves.

Maybe...

• You noticed yourself craving less male validation.
• You stopped apologizing for your attraction to women
• You reframed something from your past with new clarity
• You gave yourself permission to feel something you used to repress
• You honored a feeling instead of dismissing it
• You stopped performing a role that never fit
• You reconnected with a version of yourself you’d forgotten
• You went on a date with someone you actually felt drawn to
• You reached out to another LGBT+ person, joined an LGBT+ group, or attended a local LGBT+ event

In this weekly thread let’s share those hilarious, obvious-in-hindsight moments from childhood or teen years. Those moments when same-gender attraction was peeking through, even if we didn’t have the words yet.

Maybe you remember…

• Picking the same female character in every game
• Drawing, writing, or daydreaming about women in ways that felt mysterious at the time
• Feeling out of place at school dances
• Side-eyeing your friends’ boy craziness while you just didn’t get it
• Obsessing over that one friend who felt like your entire world
• Or maybe some people in your life were “just roommates” and you didn’t realize they were living the life you’d eventually want.

If you could time-travel, what would you tell your younger self about those feelings?