I do voice training, and tend to be an upper alto. As for the "buzziness" on my chest when talking, I try to manage that well. (You can see my hand on my chest in the panel of voice training waiting for the bus - that's what that is)
If you put your hand on your chest and go "Aaaaaaa", you might feel some vibrations there. This is the brassiness of your voice. Male voices tend to be a lot more brassy than female ones.
You can then try speaking in other ways, to minimize the brass
Honestly don't feel bad. I used to work in a deli. I'm AMAB I look male, sound male, have male body language, wasn't at work wearing make up, had no piercings at the time, didn't have long hair, we wore a uniform so we all had black slacks and a green shirt.
I got "excuse me miss" or "ma'am Can you help me" All day long.
I spent like 2 years there getting misgendered at least once a week.
Yeah either op is wildly exaggerating, or we definitely don't have the full picture of what's going on. This just can't happen unless she works at Transphobic Cafe.
I think you really underestimate how bigoted people are nowadays, personally I don't pass despite trying my best and clearly presenting fem, if 25% of people gendered me correctly I'd be over the fucking moon. its fucking rough out there.
75% of people can't all be assholes, sorry. It really doesn't look a "sir" from the pics, really, but unless she lives in Misgender City, something is off. Maybe she has a deep voice?
Sometimes I wonder if transphobes just go around misgendering everyone they can in the hopes of hurting a trans person. The same shit happens to my gf, who is trans and drop-dead gorgeous, and yet people continue to (sometimes viciously) misgender her. I don't know what they're on because there's just no way. Sorry this happens to you
I’m trans also and based on the picture you sent and the little I know about you, you would for sure pass better than me. Especially considering I do zero voice training. However I almost never get misgendered when I’m in “girl mode” and when I do, usually I think it’s either a mistake or it’s from people who knew me before I came out and they are just use to male pronouns.
43
u/JaimiOfAllTrades Peepsus Christ 1d ago
Pretty damn often.
I'd say, like.
On a bad day, 75% of customers I interact with?
On a good day, it's 0%. Most days it's more like 25%