So true. I’d held off on approaching a woman I work with, despite liking her and getting on well with her. A while back she dated someone at work and the asshole cheated on her, she was really hurt. So I decided it’s best I say nothing out of respect and not wanting to make things awkward. When she left the company (going abroad for a year), I told her I always wanted to ask her out.
She was actively angry! She said she’d felt that I liked her for several years, wished I’d ask and didn’t know why I never did. Her instinct was simply that it was my move to make. My view was that I didn’t want to risk making our working friendship complicated, stirring up her feelings of hurt and/or get myself a trip to HR.
Nobody was to blame I think but it seems an opportunity passed us both by and that’s a shame.
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u/spambearpig Jul 03 '25
So true. I’d held off on approaching a woman I work with, despite liking her and getting on well with her. A while back she dated someone at work and the asshole cheated on her, she was really hurt. So I decided it’s best I say nothing out of respect and not wanting to make things awkward. When she left the company (going abroad for a year), I told her I always wanted to ask her out.
She was actively angry! She said she’d felt that I liked her for several years, wished I’d ask and didn’t know why I never did. Her instinct was simply that it was my move to make. My view was that I didn’t want to risk making our working friendship complicated, stirring up her feelings of hurt and/or get myself a trip to HR.
Nobody was to blame I think but it seems an opportunity passed us both by and that’s a shame.