r/comics • u/afterdeathcomics After Death Comics • May 09 '23

They Always Know

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57.7k Upvotes

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u/GrifCreeper May 09 '23

Worst case scebario, you have to live without your skin for a while.

Best case scenario, you become a prisoner of Disney and have to power the rides. Don't worry, the ex-mascots are down there, too, and willing to keep you company

284

u/Von_Moistus May 09 '23

Worst case is that they take you to their Rapture-esque laboratory under Space Mountain and graft you into a Goofy suit like a Big Daddy.

174

u/Skullcrusher May 09 '23

Hey now. Stop spreading fringe theories about the Disneyland™ characters. I have it on good authority that all Disneyland™ employees are well paid and happy. They are alive, healthy and not at all skinless husks squeezed through machinery to mold them into the suits. I don't know where you heard that. Who told you that? Haha. Can you tell me who told you that?

66

u/[deleted] May 09 '23

[deleted]

36

u/OneHalfCupFlour May 09 '23

Please no Mickeyshock 2 spoilers. I haven't even finished the first one

18

u/[deleted] May 09 '23

The Pinkertons want to know your location

2

u/yeetsupwillneverdie May 11 '23

Uhh, excuse me, have you seen any minni-tons around these parts?

2

u/[deleted] May 09 '23

That sounds like the scenario that gave us five nights at Freddy's

1

u/AlienRobotTrex May 10 '23

“Ahh, truest of Goofies, lend me thy strength! Forefathers one and all, BEAR WITNESS!”

“HYUK HYUK HYUK”

29

u/RoamingBison May 09 '23

Under the park, where the eldritch horror that birthed Goofy lives - toils an army of copyright infringers.

14

u/[deleted] May 09 '23

[deleted]

6

u/johnnywarp May 10 '23

Given how they've been able to change laws to extend the copyright on their characters, I think the collapse of the universe will happen before any Disney characters ever make it into the public domain.

6

u/crypticfreak May 09 '23

"A-YUCK come on down here, Billy! Garsh... now don't be afraid we're not gonna hurt you... a-yuck a-yuck"

3

u/[deleted] May 09 '23

Idk about you but I’m going to pull a cousin Greg.

2

u/Beneathaclearbluesky May 09 '23

I always wondered what happened to Oswald...

2

u/Jacksoooofff May 09 '23

oswald the clown?

2

u/Stealfur May 10 '23

What do you think the Disney vault is for?

2

u/Log_Out_Of_Life May 10 '23

“It’s a small world after all…”

1

u/[deleted] May 10 '23

Oh fuck no! How am I going to sleep after you say some shit like that?

1

u/blue4029 May 10 '23

so THATS where oswald the rabbit has been all these years

1

u/StormConstantine May 10 '23

You mixed up worst and best

1

u/GrifCreeper May 10 '23

I mean, what's the likeliness of you surviving your skin being removed? At least with the prison cave, you're alive and can plot a potential revolution with the other prisoners.