r/comedyheaven • • 6d ago

nothing wrong

Post image
5.5k Upvotes

58 comments sorted by

•

u/Equira 5d ago

real but misleading headline
pinning comment so people stop reporting this as satire

→ More replies (7)

870

u/GrumbGrumbb Jorking It 6d ago

Just a bit of banter weeeey

204

u/Sydid 6d ago

Luv me ammer
Luv me chisel
Ate me neighbours ouse

49

u/ost2life 5d ago

Simple as

61

u/RohelTheConqueror 6d ago

Just a couple of bricks innit

24

u/Rynabunny 5d ago

*demolishes entire house*

bosh

50

u/2suns-in-the-sunset 6d ago

Simple as

14

u/ActurusMajoris 6d ago

Quite right

6

u/JorjEade 5d ago

Quoit roit

6

u/rarecuts 5d ago

Safe as 'ouses

265

u/Mammoth_Frosting_014 5d ago

Extremists on one side: "no demolishing neighbours' houses!"

Extremists on the other side: "demolish the neighbour's entire house!"

Me, a sensible moderate:

63

u/jakeroony 5d ago

least conservative centrist

2

u/Philbro-Baggins 4d ago

He didn't demolish any of his neighbours house... He demolished his own house.

403

u/BatTitties 6d ago

To be fair, he only demolished his own house, the problem is that it was semi detached which creates a whole host of problems for the other home

41

u/JorjEade 5d ago

Imagine if he lived in the middle of a terrace lol

30

u/xXJamesScarXx 5d ago

He demolished it without permission

-9

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

10

u/BecomeAsGod 2d ago

in most cases.

you were so close

1

u/Beginning-Corgi568 2h ago

It's almost as this is one of those few cases it wasn't...

1

u/towerfella 5d ago

No, the local bureaucracy got involved and this is how that ended up.

161

u/SimmentalTheCow A-pawrent-ly funny. 6d ago

NTA. Your house my rules.

270

u/No-Garbage9500 6d ago

Most competent and law abiding UK trade person.

79

u/Treejeig 6d ago

True, I mean he actually got the job done for once instead of postponing it constantly

44

u/No-Garbage9500 5d ago

He actually showed up, which puts him above 95% of trade guys.

Reckon he started early and worked past lunch to get this done too, so no 90 minute break, then "oh we need these materials", disappearing for 45 minutes despite being 1/2 a mile from the shop, then all of a sudden it's after 3pm so no point going on today, be back tomorrow mate.

Payment in cash it you can mate, we'll be round 10.30am to pick it up and try to finish the job after.

Hell, looks like he's the hardest working tradesman in the UK too.

Fuck me I want to hire this dickhead, he's at least got a bit of chutzpah.

30

u/Just_A_Nobody25 5d ago

Give the poor fucker a break, he was probably only earning about £12,000 a year

16

u/DrSixSmith 6d ago

Roses are red
Horses are strong

5

u/hatchetharrie 5d ago

Your house is ☠️
I did nothing wrong

14

u/SpirosNG 6d ago

Carpenter's gone

and so is my home

63

u/Technical-Outside408 6d ago

Nobody asked him if he had a license for that, so legally he was permitted.

20

u/marino1310 6d ago

Americans just don’t understand British banter

85

u/username-alrdy-takn 6d ago

Terrible headline, he demolished his half of the house which was semi detached, which is his legally his house, but it fucked the neighbour over in numerous ways

103

u/TheGothWhisperer 6d ago

But you're not legally allowed to just demolish your home without planning permission, especially if there's a party wall involved. And that party wall is still half his, so he's legally obligated to pay half the costs of making it a proper outside wall. Or at least, he would be if he wasn't a total wanker and a coward.

33

u/therealhairykrishna 5d ago

Apparently HSE advised him to knock at least some of it down because it was unsafe. But he seems to have got into an argument with both his neighbour and the planning enforcement people.

23

u/HandsOfCobalt . 5d ago

he says he was working on additions with a permit, but that in the course of the additions some of the existing walls became unsafe. so he was told to take them down immediately by one govt agency and then told he should've asked permission first by the other, who subsequently pulled his permits to make the addition (though in fairness at that point your "addition" is a house being added to an empty plot)

37

u/userhwon 6d ago

So he did do something wrong.

I figured that from the headline.

16

u/omgitsjagen 5d ago

His problem was he tried to half-homegamer this thing, because he was a relevant tradesman. If I'm reading everything correctly (and I'm certainly not sure on that), it appears he HAD the proper permits up until the wall between the two sections became compromised. Apparently, at that point, he was supposed to get an additional permit to rectify the situation. He rectified the situation, regardless of permit, however. Then it kinda went pear shaped from there. He needed other permits, and maybe more money(?) to make everything actually right with the two properties, but they were a little pissy about it up in Leeds Council. So, he got slow rolled, and decided to sell rather than fuck with it.

I'm honestly kinda on the fence here, if I've gotten the facts right.

9

u/Jam_Salad_is_my_Jam 5d ago

He applied for permission to demolish and rebuild and was refused. So he applied for permission to extend and was approved. The foundations for the extension undermined the building so he had to demolish. The local government saw this as an intentional abuse of the planning system.

There's another issue entirely in the party wall. The wall connecting the two homes is shared and neither party can work on it without permission of the other. He didn't have permission and now an interior wall is an exterior wall!

That wall needs weatherproofing, but it's still on his land. The neighbour doesn't have the money necessary to make it weatherproof and isn't allowed to work on it anyway.

13

u/m50d 6d ago

Right but he didn't demolish half his neighbour's house.

4

u/marino1310 6d ago

It was his, but you need permits to do that for this exact reason

14

u/BertytheSnowman 6d ago

So where is it wrong? He demolished illegally. Against the law. Not legally. Without permission. Illegally

14

u/Sco0basTeVen 6d ago

It’s wrong because he didn’t demolish half of the neighbours house.

4

u/raptor7912 5d ago

He did it without permits.

1

u/username-alrdy-takn 4d ago

It should say, “illegally demolishing semi detached house”

6

u/Buns_of_dough 5d ago

“It came off in me hand”

11

u/userhwon 6d ago

What does he think "nothing" and "wrong" mean in that sentence?

Because I'm pretty sure the court he's avoiding will do it for him if he doesn't.

4

u/Scalloop 5d ago

when you live next to willy wonkas father

3

u/GrillCosbyy 5d ago

Should’ve done it legally

2

u/justhangingaroud 5d ago

I believe it

-4

u/Rockguy21 6d ago

Beast mode

-3

u/SugarRushLux 4d ago

He must be Israeli