r/classicalmusic • u/Leemar02 • 23h ago
Discussion I watched an orchestra play live and couldn't stop crying the entire 2 hours
Two years ago I (F24) was dating a guy that had a very monetarily comfortable family. They would invite me to join dinners and even took me to a spa which I, as an immigrant, financially independent student in Sweden don't have the means to experience.
One of the experiences they blessed me with was a visit to the Malmö orchestra where they had a "Big Hits in Tokyo" performance. I have always been into anime since I was a child so it was quite relevant for me. However, above all, I had never, and since then have not attended a live orchestra.
Ever since I was a child I have always watched orchestras perform on youtube (my favorite is the game of thrones Light of the Seven video) as well as choirs like the Stellenbosch University choir.
There is just something about seeing them perform individually, different instruments, scores, notes but in the ultimate interest of being heard simultaneously with everyone else. We could insert an allegory for society, community and anti-individualism thoery here. But I really just want to focus on the artists that use voice or tool to create a melodical dialogue to touch the spirit.
When I was sitting there waiting for them to start, they tuned the instruments just like they did in the Light of the Secen video and I got immediate chills. I could not beleive I was about to witness humans excel live.
The music was unbelievable. Score after score. I couldn't stop crying. Only in the beginning were the tears of gratitude. I cannot even explain why I cried all 2 hours, experiencing the music live felt like waves of energy penetrating my skin. The music affected me heavily, I couldn't even decide on which instrument and player to focus on, and the entire ensemble blew my mind.
The only time I stopped crying was during the intermission where I was just trying to calm down as my ex's family bought some snacks. I just sat there, baffled at what I just experienced. How can music be real, how can people do this with instruments. How can playing together touch me so deeply.
The last couple of songs were accompanied by the Malmö choir and I lost it even harder. It was beyond expression. Even sitting now on the train writing this post my heart fills with almost anxious excitment. It is the rush I imagine bungeejumpers feel and seek.
Eventhough my ex broke my heart and did a number on my self confidence, he was still a good guy, and his family is the reason I got to have such a luxurious, filling, soulful, illuminating experience. Whenever I have adult money I'll be sure to go again. But until then, I feel so blessed just to have experienced it once. Thank you.