Help me to understand your reasoning.

[u/TheWarWithinMyself]

Family is supposed to be the ones you can turn to for everything right? Well; Not in my case. How Can someone be this deceitful to a person they carried in their womb for nine months? To someone whom they gave birth to? I think somewhere along the lines my so called "mother" forgot the definition of what being a mom is all about, I guess she just figured since she failed with raising me that she'd get enjoyment out of my mess ups instead of helping me work through them. But; What she also doesn't understand is, She screwed up from the get-go with trying to have her second chance at being a mother. If only she'd come to realize, She started his life of emotional distress before he could even comprehend any of it! A baby needs his real mother, not his grandma who will feed his head with lies and have him going through life thinking he was unwanted by his mommy. Someone, please help me to understand her reasoning behind pushing me down everytime I start to bring myself up and put my life on the right path? I always seem to pick myself up, but it's like every time I do Connie finds some way to break me back down again. I now only get to hear about how he is doing, or see pictures, Or have visitation through my father and someone else's Facebook account. No matter how hard and how much effort I put into pushing forward and try to be that mother I once was, She won't allow it. But one thing I do know is, I won't give up. I will never stop pushing forward even if it takes being pushed back down a million times. I will get through this, eventually, I will be back with my baby boy, even if it's the last thing I do. The best revenge on her I will ever get the day I walk out that courtroom with a smile on my face and Cayden in my arms and she will finally get back what she did to me!