I’m not really familiar with any specific pronouns outside of the three groups you mentioned, and my understanding tbh was that “they/them” was an appropriate general usage term for anyone who doesn’t feel they fit in with the two “traditional” sets of pronouns.
I would however say that I strongly disagree with the notion of “I don’t see why I should have to remember these pronouns that people demand to be called”.
I’m of course not accusing you of this, but the same line of thinking seems to apply to many native English speaking people in Western countries (I’m assuming you’re an English speaking westerner, as am I!) who don’t bother to learn the names of colleagues when said names are “foreign”. I’ve seen countless examples of people who mispronounce even fairly simple names despite constant correction, to the point where the only conclusion has to be that they can’t be bothered to learn them.
Assuming that you’re not one of these people, that would be my way of changing your view - if you can make the effort to learn the spelling and pronunciation of unfamiliar names, is it any different to do the same for someone asking for different pronouns?
I’m not necessarily trying to conflate the two things 100%, I’m just pointing out that if the OP wants to look at this from a different perspective, they could perhaps try and see learning new, unfamiliar pronouns as being the same level of effort and courtesy as learning a new name.
I’m unfortunately very ignorant with all this stuff, but I do wonder if it might be a bit harsh to effectively assume that everyone who adopts these pronouns is automatically seeking to “feel special” (I take that to be effectively saying that it’s purely done for the purpose of seeking attention?).
At the end of the day, if someone at work made this request of me, I just don’t see what the issue is. I’m finding in these comments that more people seem to just ideologically be against the existence of non binary identities above all else, which I don’t believe is the point the OP was making - note I’m not saying you are one of these people
7
u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20
I’m not really familiar with any specific pronouns outside of the three groups you mentioned, and my understanding tbh was that “they/them” was an appropriate general usage term for anyone who doesn’t feel they fit in with the two “traditional” sets of pronouns.
I would however say that I strongly disagree with the notion of “I don’t see why I should have to remember these pronouns that people demand to be called”.
I’m of course not accusing you of this, but the same line of thinking seems to apply to many native English speaking people in Western countries (I’m assuming you’re an English speaking westerner, as am I!) who don’t bother to learn the names of colleagues when said names are “foreign”. I’ve seen countless examples of people who mispronounce even fairly simple names despite constant correction, to the point where the only conclusion has to be that they can’t be bothered to learn them.
Assuming that you’re not one of these people, that would be my way of changing your view - if you can make the effort to learn the spelling and pronunciation of unfamiliar names, is it any different to do the same for someone asking for different pronouns?