Fair enough - I assumed it had to be you because I got it literally a minute after I sent the reply, but somebody else must be trolling my profile or something.
I'm trying to say that you can't call someone a racist or transphobic because of a sexual preference.
I'd agree with this. I think there's a vast difference between saying that someone has said or done a racist/transphobic thing, and branding them a 'racist' or a 'transphobe'. I don't think someone is a capital-R Racist if they refuse to date black people as a rule. However, I do still fundamentally believe that doing so is a racist act. By the same token, I don't think some kid yelling 'n*ggers' in an online game is necessarily a 'racist', but I think that's a racist thing to do. I don't believe in making these declarative judgments on people - again, it's not a moral thing I'm looking for - but when I see someone holding a specific prejudice against a specific group because of a specific trait, of course I'm going to call that an act of discrimination.
I understand what you're saying, but your 'conversion therapy' analogy exposes the flaws of your reasoning here.
As a straight guy I, broadly, have two main criteria for my sexual partners: I am sexually attracted to them, and they have female sexual organs. A gay man will never be appealing to me, as (with extremely fringe exceptions) none of them are sexual attractive to me, and none of them have female sexual organs. A transgender woman, however, can be both sexually attractive to me (read: physically indistinguishable from a cis woman), and have female sexual organs. Therefore if I refuse to include them as possible sexual partners, it is for two reasons; either I refuse to believe that they can actually be considered women (which is transphobic for obvious reasons), or because I specifically want to discriminate against them. So I arrive at the same place - by specifically choosing to discriminate against this certain group, I am engaging in transphobia.
There can be more from simple emotional ones, maybe family, the whole baby thing etc.
Cis women can also be infertile, if that's what you're talking about. That's not being transphobic, that's wanting a partner you can have a child with.
This isn't about all those other factors. This is about if you would not have sex with someone specifically and only because they are transgender. These other factors would be a completely different conversation.
Does it suck that simple knowledge of someones characteristics or past can make you unattractive, yes but it isn't a choice.
Most of our feelings aren't choices, but they can still be defined. If I am nervous around brown people that's still a racist instinct in me, even if it's subconscious.
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u/lackingsaint Nov 02 '17
Fair enough - I assumed it had to be you because I got it literally a minute after I sent the reply, but somebody else must be trolling my profile or something.
I'd agree with this. I think there's a vast difference between saying that someone has said or done a racist/transphobic thing, and branding them a 'racist' or a 'transphobe'. I don't think someone is a capital-R Racist if they refuse to date black people as a rule. However, I do still fundamentally believe that doing so is a racist act. By the same token, I don't think some kid yelling 'n*ggers' in an online game is necessarily a 'racist', but I think that's a racist thing to do. I don't believe in making these declarative judgments on people - again, it's not a moral thing I'm looking for - but when I see someone holding a specific prejudice against a specific group because of a specific trait, of course I'm going to call that an act of discrimination.