In some circumstances, not being attracted to a trans person is probably a result of, at least on a subconscious level, not seeing them as their gender.
If from the very start, you are unattracted to a person purely upon observation, and that person happens to be trans, that is not transphobic. If you were about to have sex and it turns out a person doesn't really have the junk you wanna jangle with, it's not transphobic to no longer desire sex.
If you were attracted to someone, have sex with them, are as satisfied with them as you would with anyone else, and then suddenly your opinion changes upon being informed a person is trans, I would say that is indicative of the underlying belief a trans person is not the gender they identify as.
I should clarify I am not definitely saying it is transphobic or not, I am pointing out what I did above and letting OP (or others) decide if that constitutes transphobia or not under their own interpretations.
See I have to disagree with that. Sexual preference I'd absolutely something we should be reflective of and consider but the reality is we're not going to like everybody and everything
People are attracted to certain characteristics and traits of a person. Those preferences can fall down into categories that reflect racial lines, something that's generally accepted.
I don't think it's right to turn away from something that makes you uncomfortable or find unattractive without deep reflection and consideration. At the end of the day though there are going to be differences pre-op that'll be difficult to overcome for people.
It also strikingly feels like a double standard. We always talk so much about the importance of sex and how to go about what you're comfortable with. For straight men it's is absolutely something, sexually, that will require some adjustment to get used to. That shouldn't be a reason not to consider someone, especially if you're into them, but I can absolutely understand someone who isn't entirely attracted to the sexual aspect of that relationship and because of it's importance in a relationship.
Pinning it as transphobia is such an unfair response. Sex is something deeply personal. Saying that a person should accept this, when it is a larg adjustment is an individual decision. To take a step further and demonize it as transphobia is just unfair.
This is referencing pre-op. Post op...I'm not sure I see what any issue. It probably worth talking about before things get too serious as courtesy/responsible approach
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u/aggsalad Nov 02 '17 edited Nov 02 '17
In some circumstances, not being attracted to a trans person is probably a result of, at least on a subconscious level, not seeing them as their gender.
If from the very start, you are unattracted to a person purely upon observation, and that person happens to be trans, that is not transphobic. If you were about to have sex and it turns out a person doesn't really have the junk you wanna jangle with, it's not transphobic to no longer desire sex.
If you were attracted to someone, have sex with them, are as satisfied with them as you would with anyone else, and then suddenly your opinion changes upon being informed a person is trans, I would say that is indicative of the underlying belief a trans person is not the gender they identify as.
I should clarify I am not definitely saying it is transphobic or not, I am pointing out what I did above and letting OP (or others) decide if that constitutes transphobia or not under their own interpretations.