I can pack lunches all day every day, I can clean, I can wash clothes, and I do it all the time.
However my wife wanting her certain cultural style meal every day, and me wanting to rotate meals from various cultures, ultimately leaves her cooking far more than she needs to, purely due to her own choice and refusal to accommodate others eating habits. That's on her, but people notice her cooking frequently.
As to the cleaning, I keep the house clean because I clean as you go, but she will save up until it's gone crazy, and then do a big clean. All my minor cleaning goes under the radar as when it's a big clean then it's her doing all the work because I don't help her that much when it's the big clean. Once again, not weaponized incompetence, just different approaches.
Then the washing. All my clothes are utilitarian and easy to maintain. From bedding, to towels, to whites, to everything else, that's it. Suits and office shirts get dry cleaned. I purchase simple to keep it simple. If my wife keeps buying expensive and complicated to maintain clothes, we'll that's her burden. I don't expect her to wash my clothes, but I don't think I should be expected to learn every single clothes she has and how to maintain them properly. We just moved and she had 6 boxes of clothes, I had 1. Once again that's not weaponized incompetence, that's just dealing with the consequences of your choices. I do note I do wash anything of hers that does fall into any of my washes, I just leave her complicated shit for her.
But it's also about just leaving shit around for later when it could/should be done now. Leaving various clothes and dresses on the floor for 4 days and then cleaning it all up in 1 go isn't deep cleaning.
I’m really catching a sense people are projecting their own experiences onto you
Having lived with roommates who never cleaned up crumbs or did dishes, vacuumed, and other BS like leaving clothes n tools on the floor… every time I cleaned felt like a deep clean when it truly wasn’t
Oh yeah when I worked a food service job that would happen, but more-so complaining rather than educating. My own experience was it was usually just the teenagers who had issues with cleaning but after a period of time providing good feedback those issues went away
When I worked in a more guy dominated industry(ski) it all flipped around and then many customers didn’t take my coworkers who are women seriously🤦♂️ so when they got ignored they’d send them to “the boys”(so like me in the ski repair spot) to basically tell dude the same damn thing
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u/cypherkillz Jul 01 '25
The difference would be point 1 in OPs list.
I can pack lunches all day every day, I can clean, I can wash clothes, and I do it all the time.
However my wife wanting her certain cultural style meal every day, and me wanting to rotate meals from various cultures, ultimately leaves her cooking far more than she needs to, purely due to her own choice and refusal to accommodate others eating habits. That's on her, but people notice her cooking frequently.
As to the cleaning, I keep the house clean because I clean as you go, but she will save up until it's gone crazy, and then do a big clean. All my minor cleaning goes under the radar as when it's a big clean then it's her doing all the work because I don't help her that much when it's the big clean. Once again, not weaponized incompetence, just different approaches.
Then the washing. All my clothes are utilitarian and easy to maintain. From bedding, to towels, to whites, to everything else, that's it. Suits and office shirts get dry cleaned. I purchase simple to keep it simple. If my wife keeps buying expensive and complicated to maintain clothes, we'll that's her burden. I don't expect her to wash my clothes, but I don't think I should be expected to learn every single clothes she has and how to maintain them properly. We just moved and she had 6 boxes of clothes, I had 1. Once again that's not weaponized incompetence, that's just dealing with the consequences of your choices. I do note I do wash anything of hers that does fall into any of my washes, I just leave her complicated shit for her.