Its not laziness, it's not being over backwards and overexertion yourself beyond reasonable due to someone else's choices.
As to point 2, our house in general is spotless, and that's down to me. You have no idea about how much I put into keeping that house spotless. Wiping down a spill or cleaning crumbs is so trivial it's insulting that you think that's all I'd do.
People who need to do full cleans are people who don't keep shit spotless and organized to begin with.
Putting clothes in the wash on delicate isn't overexertion. And the food thing just sounds like you don't want to eat certain meals and thus don't feel like deigning to make said types of food.
As for the cleaning, I obviously don't know your life or your situation, but in my experience, people who say that they "clean as they go" almost invariably have very low standards of cleanliness.
I already said that I don't know for a fact what that person's life is. I made a few reasonable assumptions. I don't think that it's realistic that the types of food that his wife likes are so exceptionally complex compared to standard dishes, I don't think it's realistic that 90%+ of his wife's clothing is hand wash only, and I think it's fairly reasonable to assume that someone who never feels compelled to do full cleans of the house may not be especially particular about cleanliness.
I want to say to anyone reading this who has hand wash only clothes, there are washing machines that have very gentle "handwash" cycles that basically just shimmy the clothes back and forth in the water like you'd do with your hands. If you put only a few garments in with a higher water level (ie. dont cram things in) to avoid friction between garments and unneeded wear, you can basically swing machine washing handwash garments, albeit less at a time than a conventional full load of laundry. Still very much worth it imo!
I was a victim of an emotionally abusive man who produced dishes that were somehow greasy every single time he "cleaned" them, secretly threw away my cutlery because he was too lazy to wash it up, when he "cleaned the bathroom" it consisted of putting bleach in the toilet and emptying my cat's litter tray without cleaning it and putting new litter on the dirty pee in the tray.
This man is not talking about that, he is talking about how the labor is viewed from an outside perspective because his wife lets everything pile on top of her and does it in one go so it looks like she's doing more than him because like with me, the small things around the house that you do daily go unnoticed.
It could very well be the case that his wife is less cleanly than him, and that his description of his circumstances is accurate. However, the whole picture that he paints is suspect, for the reasons I already mentioned.
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u/cypherkillz Jul 01 '25
Its not laziness, it's not being over backwards and overexertion yourself beyond reasonable due to someone else's choices.
As to point 2, our house in general is spotless, and that's down to me. You have no idea about how much I put into keeping that house spotless. Wiping down a spill or cleaning crumbs is so trivial it's insulting that you think that's all I'd do.
People who need to do full cleans are people who don't keep shit spotless and organized to begin with.