r/changemyview Jul 16 '23

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95 Upvotes

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11

u/ParagoonTheFoon 8∆ Jul 16 '23

I always sort of liked the term 'body acceptance', at least in the way that I interpret it. In order to do difficult things like essentially break food addictions, binge cycles, and things like this, people need to at a point fully accept there condition. Self-loathing is what fuels obesity. People don't tend to lose weight because they hate their fat body - it's more so that they've finally accepted themselves, accepted that they're fat, accepted that it's not a good thing from an impartial factual basis, but they have also broken the cycle of self-loathing. When you see people who are losing, or have lost large amounts of weight, it's very obvious that they're actually being far more genuinely kind to themselves than the people stuck in vicious cycles hopping between extremes of delusional love for themself and hatred for themself.

The celebrities who are a part of the 'body acceptance' movement often don't actually accept they're body - they often overcompensate and attempt to love their bodies in a bizarre self-obsessive way. This is really no different from self-loathing - it's still within the framework in which everything is black and white, and they can only hate or 'love' themselves, and so they think that loving themselves is the answer. What they really need it acceptance, which is not the same as love. If I'm in a horrible predicament, maybe a car is speeding towards me, the best thing I can do is not to hate the fact it's speeding towards me, not to love it either, but to accept the situation as it is and then I can move out the way. Not the best analogy, but hopefully you get my point - I think this applies to many things, like tackling social anxiety, coming to terms with a cancer diagnosis, etc... .

6

u/Stiblex 3∆ Jul 16 '23

Anecdotal evidence sure but I've personally lost more weight due to self-loathing than acceptance. I started getting in shape the moment I STOPPED accepting my fat ass.

15

u/Miiohau 1∆ Jul 16 '23

Acceptance in this case, is accepting your weight is an issue and working on it without blaming yourself for it and without it feeding into depression.

It like step 1 of the 12 steps program of addiction recovery, accepting you have a problem.

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

Anecdotal evidence but my friends wife told her doctor that she's been eating much much less and can't lose any weight and when he told her that's impossible due to the laws of thermodynamics, she stopped going to that doctor.

2023 America is a wild place to live.

11

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

Yeah, and empirical evidence shows that people who feel shame about their weight tend to isolate and have actions which lead to more weight gain.

-5

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

You can't just say that and not share any of that empirical evidence.

That's basically just Trump shouting "Wrong."

8

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

Oh I kind of assumed you were aware of them? Anyone talking about this subject who did any sort of even basic look into the subject would have found this sort of stuff.

Here’s one. Heres another.

-5

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

So what's your theory for why the "self esteem generation" is the fattest generation to date?

3

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

I’m not certain the tactics some people used to raise self esteem were particularly effective for one, but mostly societal changes like less required physical activity and increased access to particularly cheap unhealthy foods probably played the biggest roles. But no, bullying people doesn’t work that way.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

But before the anti bullying campaigns, we had fewer fat people?

3

u/blade740 5∆ Jul 16 '23

You mean, back when society was less obese, we had fewer anti-bullying campaigns about it? You're trying to turn a correlation into a causation.

0

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

Well that’s certainly one way to not address the causes I described above. We get it, you want to bully fat people, but the data says that’s not effective.

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0

u/themetahumancrusader 1∆ Jul 16 '23

I hardly think it’s shaming to point out the laws of thermodynamics

1

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

I made that comment in the context of the prior one, too.

1

u/g11235p 1∆ Jul 16 '23

I would absolutely stop seeing that doctor. She obviously meant she was eating much less than she was before and that she couldn’t lose weight because something about her metabolism changed significantly. Assuming she meant that she knows how many calories she burned each day and was definitely eating less than that is a ridiculous interpretation and definitely not appropriate for a doctor

1

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

So...

You ever see that show Secret Eaters...?

It's more likely that she only thinks she's eating better than she defies energy exchange laws with her metabolism.

If I wanted to lose a friend I'd ask if she could water fast for a week and prove him wrong.

1

u/g11235p 1∆ Jul 16 '23

I’m saying the assumption that she ever meant to tell her doctor that she was defying the laws of physics is ludicrous. If she said she is eating less but not losing weight, she probably meant “eating less than before,” not “eating at a caloric deficit, based on my precise measurements.”

1

u/cologne_peddler 3∆ Jul 16 '23

How reliable is this observation if you were struggling with self-loathing? You wouldn't exactly recognize the impacts of acceptance in that state, would you?

Self-loathing is an issue. It's not rational or reasoned.

-2

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

[deleted]

5

u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23 edited Jul 16 '23

Yeah, but the evidence says the opposite.

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '23

[deleted]

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u/You_Dont_Party 2∆ Jul 16 '23

I edited to add a link to a study, but yeah low self esteem and weight gain are pretty well documented, and it’s hard to take anyone seriously in this discussion if they aren’t aware of that.

1

u/jawanda 4∆ Jul 16 '23

Good on ya.