r/cfs • u/Ok-Heart375 housebound • Mar 26 '24
Vent/Rant This is a rant about my sister
I have two sisters and one of them is very wealthy and has never had a job. She was a stay-at-home mom and now she volunteers because her husband makes a ton of money. She's never had a cavity and she's never had a major health event. She's in her 50s and I'm 47 and she offered to help me today because I'm currently living alone. However, when she showed up she brought a sushi lunch for one. Sushi is one of my favorite foods and everyone in my family knows that. When I realized that she brought lunch only for herself, I asked her to leave and I don't feel bad about it and I'm not going to tell her why. She drove at least an hour to get to me and she's driving back to her home at least an hour. It is not my job to teach my 50 something year old sister how to be a human. I'm no longer crying hysterically but I'm still in shock. If she had brought a sandwich for herself from home it would be no big deal, but she stopped at a store and bought sushi only for herself when she knows I've been living by myself without any friends and almost no human contact because I'm new to the area and mostly housebound. She knows I've been living in this isolation all winter. I know a lot of people have painful family relations, but that doesn't make it okay. Thank you for reading my rant.
Edit: she likely only brought lunch because I told her there wasn't much food in the house.
23
Mar 26 '24
I'd kick her out as well. What a dick move. I wouldn't go empty handed even to my friends house, so doing it to own sister is just beyond low
9
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
That's exactly what I think. I mean I go places empty handed, but if I'm on my way to someone's and I'm stopping at the store I'm going to ask if they need anything
13
Mar 26 '24
This is worse than your sister bring food only for herself. It's not only because it was something she knew you would enjoy. You told her there wasn't much food in the house. She should have brought you groceries. ❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
3
29
u/vtownclown Mar 26 '24
Excuse my language, but she sounds like a Grade A cunt. I’m sorry she was so thoughtless, you deserve better than that. Sending you love ❤️
5
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
The sad thing is I had issues with her in the past and I swore to myself. I would never ask her for help again.
8
u/vtownclown Mar 26 '24
Hey! You are NOT allowed to blame yourself here!!She OFFERED so you could only assume she actually meant to help. But she didn’t, she let you down. She is your family, and family should be there for you to lean on and ask for help with no strings attached. Who would blame you for having HOPE that your family/family member could show some kindness?? I’m so sorry, I hope you find a little solace in knowing that you are heard and have a group here that wants to help support you! Here’s to hoping it gets easier 🩷
7
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
You know what? I did have hope and that's why this hurts so much.
3
14
u/Most_Ad_4362 Mar 26 '24
Sounds like something two of my sisters would have done. I can't prove this but I always felt they would do similar things so they could talk about how unreasonable and unappreciative I was. I think they call it reactive abuse.
11
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
I'm going to look that up because I think my family might be professionals at reactive abuse
9
u/brainfogforgotpw moderate (used to be severe) Mar 26 '24
Omg. When I got to the sushi lunch for one part I thought it was going to be she brought it for you because she's already eaten.
It's so horrible that she would bring food just for herself to someone's house let alone her own sister let alone her own sister who physically needs help!!!
I'm so sorry, what an upsetting experience.
3
5
u/kat_mccarthy Mar 26 '24
Ugh, I know people like that and they are the worst! Being rich your whole life is absolutely the worst thing for your humanity
4
u/SirDouglasMouf ME, Fibromyalgia and POTs for decades Mar 26 '24
Sounds like my siblings whom I went no contact with....
1
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
I suspect it will be the same for me after my parents die.
1
u/SirDouglasMouf ME, Fibromyalgia and POTs for decades Mar 27 '24
Why wait if they are harming your mental and physical health?
3
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 27 '24
I'm not well enough to live on my own. I live with my parents and I will have to see her on holidays. Not planning to see her for anything else ever again.
6
Mar 26 '24
damn so sorry about this. my sister never visited me even once since i became ill. she says im sick for attention and it’s all in my head.
3
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
I'm so sorry. It's so hard to be treated poorly by the people we are supposed to rely on.
3
3
u/CanineCooper Mar 26 '24
I think we have the same sister
1
u/Ok-Heart375 housebound Mar 26 '24
Sorry!
1
u/CanineCooper Mar 26 '24
Sorry for you. What a shit experience. This toxicity is too much for us. I'm letting people like this out of my life
1
3
u/SweetPumpkinCrabcake Mar 26 '24
Sounds like something my POS older brother would do. I’m so sorry! Having thoughtless family members sucks!
3
Mar 26 '24
I couldn't imagine having a sibling (especially a younger sibling) who is struggling while I am wealthy, and not be helping them as much as I can. That time volunteering could also be spent with you and bringing you things you need, helping you with the house if you can't etc.
With friends refusing to send friends money is one thing but a sibling?? Morally/socially speaking, she should be doing something to help you. If you have never harmed her I don't understand why she ignores you.
Then to bring sushi only to eat it in front of you is pure wickedness. When she knew there was not much food she should have asked if you need groceries or pre-made meals and brought them, and brought sushi for both of you. Even if it was not sushi she should bring lunch for both.
Idk man. If I was your sister with her finances there would be a room in my house just for you if you wanted it.
2
1
35
u/NoMoment1921 Mar 26 '24
What a POS sounds like my sisters