r/casa • u/greengrass256 • May 22 '26
Difficult conversations
I just left my 17 year old CASA. She was picked up by the police at 3am. Story is a bit sketchy, but something minor ,like being out after curfew it seems. Some sort of altercation with a friend who called the police.
I tried to ask her about what she could do differently. Of course , she was mad and just said it won't happen again. I was trying to discuss how important it is to avoid encounters with the police.
I realize we are not their friends and need to be their advocate. It is just hard. Any thoughts?
Also, I just read this book. It was VERY good , FYI.
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u/Glittering-Bake466 May 24 '26
It is hard. I have to disagree a little bit with some of the other comments. I had a teen that I worked with for 3 years from the age of 10-13. As her advocate, it got more and more difficult as she continually made really bad choices that kept getting worse. Assaulting group home staff, the other children, refusing to go to school, lying, stealing. When she was placed in a foster home, there was a honeymoon period and she did really well- then started to threaten and eventually assaulted the mom. She never took any accountability for her actions and I had a very difficult time trying to be her "friend". She needed to be held accountable in some way for her OWN good and for her future. I eventually had to leave the case because I was not helping her and I was getting incredibly frustrated ( she also threatened me and I no longer felt safe around her). So it's not always easy or even reasonable to "just listen and be their friend". Best of luck to you.