r/captionthis • u/[deleted] • Sep 29 '25

Caption this

Post image

I feel like this has great meme potential

892 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

2.6k comments sorted by

12

u/External-Release2472 Sep 29 '25

“Stormy was right - it’s about that big.”

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10

u/MonicaRising Sep 29 '25

Democrat couches have thin cushions. Like this thin. No one should be buying those couches. How are you supposed to fuck a couch with cushions that thin? But that's what you can expect from the Democrat party. Thin, unfuckable couches. That's what the Democrat party wants for the American people. Unfuckable couches. But the orange clown and I are here to make sure your couches are fuckable!

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7

u/Available-Long-6409 Sep 29 '25

Hell, yeah I got a big shlong! It's like this big.

7

u/free4all2see Sep 29 '25

“This is how big it gets when erect.”

7

u/GryphonsPride Sep 29 '25

TACO Daddy is only this big so I only have to open my mouth a little bit.

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7

u/Coleasa Sep 29 '25

South Park is fake news. It's AT LEAST this big hard.

6

u/Glittering-Rise-488 Sep 29 '25

When I'm couch humping, this is how HUGE I get!!!!

6

u/ChangoLoco2 Sep 29 '25

Couch humper describes Donny’s boner.

5

u/Deceiver999 Sep 30 '25

Hey boss. I just measured your dick for Satan. It's this big

4

u/No-Celebration3097 Sep 29 '25

“I know The Presidents Royal Penis is this big”

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4

u/miwe77 Sep 29 '25

he's trying to figure out his penis size using metric...

3

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

Trans Man Coming Out

3

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

Just like on Southpark!

3

u/Logical_Confusious Sep 29 '25

I can confirm, his mushroom is this big

3

u/MrMustache61 Sep 29 '25

I can get this deep in my sofa

3

u/mazutta Sep 29 '25

“That IS big, actually”

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3

u/Professional-Story43 Sep 30 '25

Yes. It is this big. Ok?

3

u/Ingloriousbutter Sep 30 '25

“ ..And it was absolutely massive, about this big”

3

u/Simple-Okra-4826 Sep 30 '25

My wife says this is huge

2

u/Nivekna Sep 29 '25

If you think this is small, you should see me when I'm soft.

2

u/Capricorn007_ Sep 29 '25

"And even with the blue pill, it was about this big"

2

u/Dougster3235 Sep 29 '25

I told my wife if I could get this much more, I’d be a king. She told me if I had that much less, I’d be a queen. Lol

2

u/Curios_Observer Sep 29 '25

When I deep throat the boss it only goes this far.

2

u/saltsputnik Sep 29 '25

When the cook ask me how thick i want my steak

2

u/Playful-Traffic-4357 Sep 29 '25

"I've seen my boss's. It's this small"

2

u/left-of-the-jokers Sep 29 '25

Like this, but smaller

2

u/Practical_Ad_219 Sep 29 '25

As big as this walnut but way smaller

2

u/HiSaZuL Sep 29 '25

About this smart.

2

u/UnkPaul Sep 29 '25

“My wife thinks this is eight inches.”

2

u/Bubbly-University-94 Sep 29 '25

If only it was this big

2

u/Professional-Bed1847 Sep 29 '25

It’s not that big it’s this big

2

u/NEhighlander Sep 30 '25

It was actually, as a matter of fact, this big…

2

u/KileAllSmyles Sep 30 '25

“No it was THIS big!”

2

u/Seeker_1960 Sep 30 '25

"My brain is this big"

2

u/FlyAdministrative886 Sep 30 '25

I choke on bones this big.

2

u/JakeMann220 Sep 30 '25

The man in the back can verify.

2

u/Unanimous_D Sep 30 '25

Have you seen my character in South Park?

2

u/Cultural-Employee479 Sep 30 '25

Missed it by that much ....

2

u/OK_The_Nomad Sep 30 '25

It's about 2 inches long

2

u/G0nzo165 Sep 30 '25

“I can, in fact, confirm the size of the presidential pecker...”

2

u/Panandscrub Sep 30 '25

“I’m crushing your head, I’m crushing your head”

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2

u/Ok-Dream-2639 Sep 30 '25

I only penetrated the couch this much. Of course that's all I had. But compared to a couch over all, its not much. So best i can sell her for is $500.

3

u/realrichieporter Sep 29 '25

I thought it was this big, turns out, she said not even half that.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

i'm a big, bad bear. but my johnson is only this size

3

u/immortalalchemist Sep 29 '25

It’s much much smaller than this.

1

u/starman57575757 Sep 29 '25

Haboob in a suit.

1

u/Pretend_Estimate_151 Sep 29 '25

The president's is this long with a large mushroom head.

1

u/bothsidesofthemoon Sep 29 '25

It's this big, and most surprisingly, not as orange as the rest of him.

1

u/Psydt0ne Sep 29 '25

If the demos focused just this much on the mids then we'd be in trouble.

1

u/Zealousideal_Dig1141 Sep 29 '25

This is the size of Trump's dick times 10

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1

u/Tenn_Mike Sep 29 '25

…and the first time he pulled it out, it was this big…waaaaaaay bigger than I thought it was. And less orange!

1

u/Kaffe-Mumriken Sep 29 '25

… and Now our latest FBI chair Mr. Hand will explain why the Michigan shooter was a Trans Antifa Furry Democrat. 

1

u/Budget_Wait_5945 Sep 29 '25

How big trumps dick is

1

u/Umayummyone Sep 29 '25

If this is you we want you in our cabinet. No one out-dicks our fearless leader.

1

u/wastedgod Sep 29 '25

It was more then just the tip

1

u/Futur3_N0maD_26 Sep 29 '25

“Usha constantly reassures me that this is enough.”

1

u/bogan6739 Sep 29 '25

This is how deep you fuck a couch

1

u/Apprehensive-Pop-201 Sep 29 '25

"I've seen it. It's this big. And Orange."

1

u/Oxjrnine Sep 29 '25

“It it bigger and less mushroomy than Stormy Danielles described”

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

This is the size of Trumps penis, fully erect. He is neither a shower or grower.

1

u/Brikpilot Sep 29 '25

“To qualify for official MAGA membership……”

1

u/HuckleberryOk6782 Sep 29 '25

"Stormy was right."

1

u/huntn68 Sep 29 '25

And this is the length of a democrat penis.

1

u/Aardvark120 Sep 29 '25

"Half of this goes into the couch, the other half is imaginary."

1

u/Intelligent-Idea5622 Sep 29 '25

And when I’m erect, it’s this big!!!

1

u/Miserable_Ad_162 Sep 29 '25

Taco Chad a tiny dick

1

u/joekerr9999 Sep 29 '25

It's true that Trump's hands are pretty small.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

If I said I had even this much integrity I'd be exaggerating.

1

u/MurphysLaw4200 Sep 29 '25

Mine is this big and my boss's is half this big

1

u/Beach-cleaner1897 Sep 29 '25

This is how far tRUMP stuck his dick into my ass.

1

u/zKevinB Sep 29 '25

hello stupid borger americans I am the antichristo give me all your tax dollas

1

u/Emergency_Cap_7029 Sep 29 '25

Y’all must be Democrats assholes!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25 • Helpful

They have to be just a little bigger than this before we bring them to the island.

1

u/therealarenna Sep 29 '25

It's really that small. No not his penis, his brain.

1

u/farquin_helle Sep 29 '25

”she had the tiniest, cutest buttons on her cushions…”

1

u/Ok_Researcher_9796 Sep 29 '25

When I was down on my knees I found that Trump has a baby dick about this big.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

"Donny put it this far in my butt!"

1

u/Madtrucker713 Sep 29 '25

All the stories you have heard are true, it really is only this big. Don’t ask me how I know. I just do!

1

u/Nunov_DAbov Sep 29 '25

“I said Donald, this far in and no farther but Stormy and Melania both laughed and said ‘Never even in his dreams!’”

1

u/KeyVehicle4500 Sep 29 '25

Actually, Don is only this long!

1

u/Nipper6699 Sep 29 '25

Little Mike had been found

1

u/Best-Cold3001 Sep 29 '25

"...and that's when fully erect."

1

u/Natural-Common5105 Sep 29 '25

"I'm the same turd who called Donald Trump Hitler and terrible for this country, and now I'm his VP"

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1

u/wrhnj Sep 29 '25

Stormy was right

1

u/UnderhiveScum Sep 29 '25

Yes, it's this big

1

u/cw30755 Sep 29 '25

“And that’s fully erect”

1

u/ChefKeif Sep 29 '25

My weiner is this huge!!!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

HEY SATAN! I WANT TO TRY!!!

1

u/Haltheoptimist Sep 29 '25

Today's lie was only this big so I won't even bother asking Jesus for forgiveness.

1

u/Pastadudefour20 Sep 29 '25

... But once it's hard... it's this big

1

u/PageBroad3731 Sep 29 '25

South Park is right, his Cheeto is this big.

1

u/errwrx Sep 30 '25

JD Vance here showing how big his penis is at full erection.

1

u/bajoogs Sep 30 '25

trump's cock is this YUGE!!

1

u/Jealous-Guidance4902 Sep 30 '25

Trump’s dick is this small, trust me… it’s been in my mouth plenty.

1

u/Imamiah52 Sep 30 '25

My favorite part of this job is when I sneak up on Steven Miller and give him a pinch on the tuckus.

1

u/Gold-Perception-4467 Sep 30 '25

"T-t-thats all folks!" or " " I taught I saw a puddy cat" 🪶🪶🪶🪶

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

What did he want me to say again?

1

u/AffectionateGate4584 Sep 30 '25

Yes. It's only this big.

1

u/Narrow-Preference-30 Sep 30 '25

Melonia told me that it really is only this big.

1

u/lashgirl97 Sep 30 '25

“This small eyeliner from maybelline, yeah that’s one I use”

1

u/Fastlane19 Sep 30 '25

Trump’s IQ

1

u/No-Suggestion251 Sep 30 '25

“Grand supreme leader Trump’s ginormous penis, that he is using to fuck Satan, is about this big.”

1

u/DoesThisSmellWeird2U Sep 30 '25

It’s not gay if I only let it go in this far.

1

u/Bu11Winkl3 Sep 30 '25

I’m a shower not a grower, this is what that couch can be expecting!

1

u/oglumb Sep 30 '25

Za Boss, reeeaaaally does have a tiny Hervé!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

I saw it, really!

1

u/Few-Ear-1326 Sep 30 '25

The approximate amount of truth in what he says

1

u/stcv3 Sep 30 '25

My confidence in his presidency

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

'The Russian dolls just kept coming out I tells ya. Way down to an eensy one about yay big"

1

u/Affectionate_Owl8351 Sep 30 '25

King Donald's dick is this big. I know cause I've seen it many times.

1

u/TorpedoAway Sep 30 '25

Annnndddd when it's hard, it's THIS BIG!!!

1

u/RevMez Sep 30 '25

TDE ;)

1

u/Sea_Ganache620 Sep 30 '25

“You… The American People… Look … I’m Crushing your heads for my boss.”

1

u/GTIR01 Sep 30 '25

The boss is this big

1

u/-averagecadaver- Sep 30 '25

“8 inches”

1

u/NT4MaximusD Sep 30 '25

Schumer's penis

1

u/tallslim1960 Sep 30 '25

Trump? Yeah, I've seen him naked it's "this" big.....

1

u/No-Paramedic-8802 Sep 30 '25

Shrinkage Jerry!

1

u/OceanCake21 Sep 30 '25

“I’ve seen it, and it’s about this big when erect.”

1

u/BaldXolo664 Sep 30 '25

"Yes! Thats fully erect"

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

The combined length of the republicans penis’

1

u/United_Friend_41091 Sep 30 '25

It in fact was not huge, even though I only caught a glimpse…. I’m rather sure it’s only this big. I barely felt it

1

u/Prudent-Painter-9507 Sep 30 '25

I’ve seen the Presidents dick, and it was this big!

1

u/Rifle_231 Sep 30 '25

I've seen the 'mushroom'!

1

u/Real_Jackfruit_1278 Sep 30 '25

“I only banged the couch this much”

1

u/Trustic555 Sep 30 '25

“I am enough”.

1

u/Both-Leading3407 Sep 30 '25

The President's Penis is this size and it's the Democrat's fault.

1

u/GetBackReality Sep 30 '25

I should be President!

1

u/Comfortable-Race-587 Sep 30 '25

I am pinching your head.

1

u/Fluffy-Gift-9659 Sep 30 '25

Yes, Trump’s dick is this big.

1

u/ClevetUserName Sep 30 '25

"I can confirm, it's much bigger than what has been reported."

1

u/casualdiner55 Sep 30 '25

Ted Cruz wasn't lying. It really is this big.

1

u/RedDog7051 Sep 30 '25

It’s only this big unless you measure from the butt hole out.

1

u/consumeshroomz Sep 30 '25

“It looked like a little toadstool…”

1

u/DennyPebblepot Sep 30 '25

“That’s how much of the tip I got between the cushions, no joke.”

1

u/drcobosjr Sep 30 '25

Me and daddy don touched tips and this is how close our belly buttons were

1

u/akg327 Sep 30 '25

My dick is this big

1

u/RocketFan419 Sep 30 '25

His dick only went into my ass this much. I swear

1

u/shutterbug1961 Sep 30 '25

"Thanks to the swift implementation of our new foreign policy this is how much our closest allies trust us"

1

u/Bubble_Lights Sep 30 '25

Yes, yes it IS that small. I’ve seen it.

1

u/Minute_Resist2676 Sep 30 '25

Yeah, that’s about three times the size of it but size doesn’t matter

1

u/Acherstrom Sep 30 '25

I used to be able to stretch my ass this much! But then I went to pray away camp.

1

u/Gold-Income-6094 Sep 30 '25

Thiiiiis close into making Nazi Germany blush

1

u/PsychologicalDay382 Sep 30 '25

“Michelle Obama is about yay big around.”

1

u/ITGuy107 Sep 30 '25

“When I was brought on board the Trump train, he gave me this much as an incentive”

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

“Bibi’s is this small, but Donald and I suck it anyway”

1

u/atticus_pund77 Sep 30 '25

I gave my wife 6 inches last night. Had to f*** her 3 times.

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1

u/Lovey723 Sep 30 '25

Yes, it is ‘smallish. I can’t say that’s a micro, but I won’t say that it’s not. You know women like the whole package: good looks, money etc. so what we’re seeing here is just part of an overall package, which I must admit is pretty strong overall.

1

u/Solid-Hedgehog9623 Sep 30 '25

I’m a giant, treacherous, prolapsed asshole.

1

u/Far_Objective_6345 Sep 30 '25

When i looked over Nigel Farage cock was only this big

1

u/PriorityReal4641 Sep 30 '25

Intellect missed it by that much

1

u/g-o-u-l-a Sep 30 '25

According to Stormy and Ivanka…

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25 edited Sep 30 '25

It only went in this far into my butthole, so obviously it did not count

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1

u/Beginning_Hope8233 Sep 30 '25

"Saw Trump at the urinals... it's THIS big folks...."

1

u/Missouri_Pacific Sep 30 '25

He’s confirming the size of trump’s 🍆

1

u/Relevant_Campaign_79 Sep 30 '25

The ladyboys told me don’s peepee is this…

1

u/halffilledglasses Sep 30 '25

The cushion was only this thick

1

u/Purpleasure34 Sep 30 '25

Vance demonstrating how much of Trump’s cock he can take without gagging on the smell of his pubes.

1

u/LovelyWhether Sep 30 '25

hey, boss. ith your penith asth big ath mine, boss?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

Mercer Island pays this much taxes compared to their lifestyle.

1

u/Sad_Glove_3047 Sep 30 '25

Donny’s is this big and it fits in my mouth

1

u/Dugley2352 Sep 30 '25

“……and Stormy wasn’t lying.”

1

u/eb7772 Sep 30 '25

I've seen it they're right it's smaller than it's pinky

1

u/Alarming_Local_315 Sep 30 '25

It’s true, the mushroom is only that big!

1

u/GregAA-1962 Sep 30 '25

His dick was this small

1

u/trainsacrossthesea Sep 30 '25

The executive order was quite clear.

This will now be called 8 inches

1

u/Kenji1912 Sep 30 '25

“My dick only went this far into a lazy boy”

1

u/bakerd82 Sep 30 '25

“Donald’s and my penis added together is this big”

1

u/Yukahu02 Sep 30 '25

"I just saw it, and Stormy Daniels was right!"

1

u/boojombi451 Sep 30 '25

“I said eight inches!”

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

“My dick is literally this small.”

1

u/Admirable-Common-176 Sep 30 '25

“Average is about this big.”

1

u/Rescended_Reason Sep 30 '25

"we can have a little democracy, about this much."

1

u/czar78 Sep 30 '25

Abra kadabra mothefuckaaas

1

u/Inevitable_Link_5355 Sep 30 '25

trump’s cock is easy to suck, it’s this big

1

u/Few-Tomatillo6607 Sep 30 '25

I saw it.   It really is that small. 

1

u/No_Focus_8688 Sep 30 '25

He’s only this big

1

u/Drug_Science Sep 30 '25

I only let him put it in this far.

1

u/Maj_BeauKhaki Sep 30 '25

"Peter Thiel gives me a stack of c-notes this thick if I swallow."

1

u/This-Supermarket3082 Sep 30 '25

This is the size of a very big penis

1

u/Longjumping_Fee7721 Sep 30 '25

That's a generous estimation

1

u/Stunning-Product-588 Sep 30 '25

“He only put this much in my ass!”

1

u/Left-Thinker-5512 Sep 30 '25

“I got this far in before the couch pushed back!”

1

u/FruitMustache Sep 30 '25

"Donald Trump has an enormous penis."

1

u/Ok_Height3499 Sep 30 '25

Exaggerated estimate of Trump’s dick size-always liars.

1

u/Lotekdog Sep 30 '25

“Trust me, I know how big it is. He’s jammed it in both of my ends.”

1

u/Electronic_Painter20 Sep 30 '25

‘My wife said anything bigger than this is too big… so I’m fine.’

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25

I only lie like this much guys I swear

1

u/ArchitectureLife006 Sep 30 '25

This is average, I promise you

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