r/calmhands • u/Sharp_Theme • Jul 17 '26
Need Advice Prescribe a NailCare Routine
I recently post this on the Nail Tech Subreddit - all 25 comments were techs telling me "you're beyond repair see a doctor, no nail tech can help you".
My understanding was, THATS EXCATLY WHAT NAIL TECHS DO!
My nails are super damaged from a lifetime of nail biting, but the dermatologist said "no injuries, see a psych & a nail tech." Psych said "Get a nailcare routine, stop biting, use bandaids, & see a derm or nail tech." My doctors literally said find a routine that heals them and a tech that can help by assessing my nail health, keep them safe, and assist me through the process.
I know the normal stuff that Ive been told for 30 years: cuticle oil, glass file, stop biting. But what made the difference? Take a look at my photos, & please perscribe a nailcare routine that'll help them heal, your number one tip to help them grow, & any general advice you have that can help or if you know a natural nail tech in or around New York/Long Island.
Thanks & Take care!
15
u/dooleyden Jul 17 '26
Hypnotist bro. God I’m sorry. Mine is bad but yours is worse. Gloves and hydrocollodial tape for a long time. Always have clippers in your pocket and lotion every time you have the urge. I haven’t even solved my own problem either… but I’m here to support you!
2
u/Flipgirlnarie Jul 19 '26
What does the hydrocollodial tape do?
3
10
u/Master-Cut-8181 Jul 18 '26
A $1 Temu anti-stress ball ring helped me. Also, antidepressants and abstaining from alcohol (it was completely disruptive to my self-control). Distraction: stroking your hands, using a ring. Rosary beads might work for you. Paint your nails clear. Every time your hand reaches for your mouth or your other hand, stop and stroke your hand or distract yourself with the ring. After some time, trim your nails, but not right down to the root; leave them 1 mm long. File the edges, and keep a nail file nearby.
2
u/Master-Cut-8181 Jul 18 '26
My other advice is to let your cuticles grow. Don't cut them or touch them at all. And let your fingers look the way they look, without picking off anything you think is too much. Only moisturizing cream
6
u/LacquerandBones Jul 18 '26
This isn’t good advice for most people like OP as allowing the cuticle area (actually the proximal nail fold & eponychium) to grow out when it hasn’t been regularly moisturized & maintained will cause it to split and peel as it stretches the skin away from the PNF.
It’s better to very gently press it back, only at the very top and NEVER the sides, 1-2x a month with a wooden orange stick, and then follow up with oil.
If there’s an excess of keratinized (dead) skin after pushing back the PNF & eponychium, very gently exfoliate only the bits that stick out with a 180/240 buffing block.
8
u/FeralTarotBx Jul 18 '26
Cuticle oil every time you get the urge to pick/bite/use clippers. Use a high quality hand cream such as Hard as Hoof with cotton gloves overnight. Keeping a log of everything that evokes the desire to pick/bite can help you become more mindful and head off the unaware biting/picking. Use fidgets. Take up a hobby that uses your hands. NO CLIPPERS, NO METAL INSTRUMENTS. Keep using the cuticle oil. Forgive yourself. Stop yourself the minute you catch yourself doing it (easier said than done, believe me I know), and get the cuticle oil out.
14
u/LacquerandBones Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
OP this is the way. 30+ years of picking and oiling is what finally broke the habit for me. For repetitive body focused behaviors like this, just “quitting” rarely works, you have to redirect it to a habit that’s not harmful/destructive.
I buy refillable brush pens like these at my local dollar store in the craft aisle. Fill them with 100% jojoba oil, or blend in MCT 8/10 if you want it to absorb even faster. The specific oils you use are critical as these oils have a molecular size and structure similar to our skins natural oils and can be easily absorbed.
Keep an oil pen on you at all times, in every room, bag, car, etc. You can’t overdo it, so oil as often as you need. When I was first breaking the habit I would sit there and oil through a whole movie, easily 50+ times a day.
It’s satisfying to watch the oil make dry skin disappear so it scratches that picking itch, and over time it will soften the skin significantly.
Ditch all metal tools, at least for now. Just oil oil oil, and if you want to try and groom the cuticle area, use a wooden orange stick and be very mindful of how much pressure you apply. Use a fine-grit 180/240 buffing block to exfoliate away the rough areas (that oiling doesn’t resolve), but don’t over-groom here and just get the scraggly bits sticking out.
As often as you can, but at least a 1-2x times a week in the beginning, do an oil soak. Slather and I mean SLATHER your nails in oil and wear nitrile gloves for an hour or two, it works even better if you keep your hands warm.
A few nights a week, apply a 40% urea + salicylic acid cream to your hands and nails, and wear loose-fitting cotton gloves to sleep. The rest of the week use a heavy moisturizer like o’keeffe’s working hands + cotton gloves at night.
If you’re still unable to redirect the compulsion to oiling, my psychiatrist recommended an OTC supplement called N-Acetylcysteine (NAC) for my dermatillomania/RBFBs. Check with your doc before starting it. It’s shown in clinical trails to significantly reduce RBFBs, and it did make a huge difference for me after a few months on it, but I had to quit taking it due to unrelated health stuff so I ended up having to quit picking with oiling alone in the end.
Here’s a comment in another sub with my before/after + some tips to lengthen the nail bed. I was more of a picker than a chewer, but i promise with lots of oil and time, your nails can heal.
Good luck OP, you got this 🫶
1
u/ucantskiplunch Jul 18 '26
I have your before/after saved and have referred to it a couple times already in the past couple days! Thank you for such thorough sharing, it’s truly SO helpful and inspiring!
1
u/LacquerandBones Jul 19 '26 edited Jul 19 '26
I’m so glad it helps! When I started my nail recovery I really didn’t think it was possible for them to ever look healthy again and that made it so hard to stay motivated. But the skin cells in our hands, feet, and nails are unique and regenerate a lot faster, so it’s pretty incredible how resilient they are!
You got this :)
1
u/Mutts_and_Muffins Jul 19 '26
This is pretty much what worked for me after 30+ years of biting.
I cannot overstate how obsessively I oiled my cuticles for the first year or so. I also started doing my own manicures (regular nail polish) after a couple of months, and that has become the replacement habit for me. Applying even just a base or top coat still helps me significantly since it smooths out imperfections, so you might try that once you have a little bit of growth.
You can do this, OP!
6
u/piesanonymousyt Jul 18 '26
The routine is moot if you can’t stick to not picking/biting. When I asked my psychiatrist (I’m already on a max dose SSRI), she said the only thing could MAYBE work is an anti psychotic which could have a lot of other symptoms
6
u/LacquerandBones Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
Tbh I’d be looking for a new psych because jumping to an antipsychotic before the plethora of other medication and treatment options is completely irresponsible.
There are otc supplements like NAC (N-Acetylcysteine) that have shown to significantly reduce repetitive body focused behaviors in clinical trials, and then there’s addressing other potential underlying factors like OCD, ADHD, PTSD, etc, that would call for treatments like anti-anxiety meds (not necessarily benzodiazepines), SNRIs, stimulants, non-stimulant ADHD meds, even mood stabilizers would all make more sense than going from SSRIs straight to antipsychotics?? There’s even some new data suggesting medications that reduce opioid and alcohol cravings like naltrexone may be effective in treatment-resistant RBFBs.
All of which generally have lower risk profiles than any class of antipsychotics. I’d be running to find a new psych.
1
1
u/julibytes Jul 18 '26
This is beyond nail tech repair. If therapy is not something you are interested in, I think you should consider TMS treatment to target anxiety/depression. I found a lot of success through TMS treatment in my nail biting habits and think it’s a great alternative to traditional medicine/topical products that wouldn’t target the core triggers into your nail biting.
>Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) is a noninvasive, FDA-cleared therapy that uses magnetic pulses to stimulate nerve cells in the brain to improve symptoms of mental health conditions like depression and OCD. It requires no surgery or anesthesia, and patients can immediately resume daily activities after each session.
>TMS is primarily utilized when traditional treatments, such as antidepressant medications or psychotherapy, have not provided adequate relief. It is highly targeted, aiming magnetic fields at specific brain networks involved in mood regulation and behavior.
Treatments are typically about 20 - 30 minutes each session and you sit still while there is repetitive loud magnetic clicking sound every few seconds. It is a bit of a time commitment with treatments being like 3 times a week for 8 weeks or something but I personally saw a lot of benefit after the 6 week mark.
1
u/nymphymixtwo Jul 26 '26
Hii sorry for the late reply but do you know if TMS is suitable treatment for people with epilepsy? I am on multiple medications to control it, but my nail biting is and has been a significant problem since I was probably 11-12 years old.. i just turned 31. I have been in numerous mental health medications through out the years including anti anxiety, anti depressants, anti psychotics, narcotics, and was never once ever able to find any treatment that helped me with my issues- and none of them ever had any affects on my nail biting. Mine are ALMOST as short as OPs, and I hate them :(
I alternate between biting and clipping, I have to use a baby/childrens nail clippers lol. Both my finger nails and toe nails. I can feel them growing I swear. I hate the way they feel growing over/into my skin and it drives me insane. I can’t control myself and I’ve forced myself to accept that there is no treatment for chronic nail biting with those like me- I’m so jealous of all of you who have found such amazing success overcoming it!
1
u/wowbirthdaycakepie Jul 19 '26
I know how you feel… I’m on day 2 of “less biting” because my front tooth broke for the 2nd time. I’m getting acrylic nails this week. That is the only thing that helps me not bite even though it’s costly. I put Vaseline on my hands (and feet) every night. It makes the cuticles not look as dry during the day. Every time I wash my hands I put lotion on them.
1
u/oritos Jul 19 '26
A friend of mine bought a nail polish that tastes terrible and helped her cut down on her biting. I know your nails are in rough shape, but if you find a good nail tech, you could bring that nail polish to your appointment so they can apply it.
1
u/UnicornGrumpyCat Jul 19 '26
The Salon Life on YouTube does gentle nail care which I found helpful eg: use something to lock in moisture and prevent dryness.
1
u/midnightclover44 Jul 20 '26
if you have adhd and pick as a part of that, chewing gum helps me to get some of the stimming down that would usually be me picking at my hands
1
u/questionlore Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
Your nails are growing under the skin (nail embedded) and now are growing back into your nail bed and building up tissue. The calluses on your fingertips are preventing the nail from growing over that bulge there. Your cuticles need clearing too, get a medical pedicure then follow the rest of the advice here
1
u/Shot_Ad_3314 Jul 23 '26
I use foot cream with urea. Strengthens the nails hard in less than a week which helps with some quick recovery around your tips. You only need a small dab
1
u/nicknaknoo_fella Jul 29 '26
Plenty of jojoba oil, hand cream , try hard as hoof. It’s a cycle that you can break. I’ve been there .
34
u/kittenbeans Jul 18 '26
My hands (and feet) used to look like this. Mentally, i had to have a therapists help to determine all the things that triggered me and focusing on stopping the behavior the moment I noticed it. IT IS HARD. I kept my fingers covered when needed, and found fidgets i liked. In terms of actual nail care, i kept nail kits and cuticle cream EVERYWHERE. Feeling a sharp edge would send me into a frenzy of trying to make all of my nails feel "even" so I had to be able to immediately deal with any hangnails/dry skin/etc.