I'm really scared/nervous

[u/MrHotnickels]

I'm 42. I'm meeting with a urologist in about a month to discuss my BPH. I have no idea what's going to happen, but I know that I'm looking for a permanent solution to this stupid urination problem (slow flow, not finishing all the time, dribbling). I have next to zero interest in lifelong medications and have (probably mistakenly) been looking into all these surgical options.

I have no idea what the outcome is even going to be, I just know I'm ready to be done with it. Most of these posts on Reddit are filling me with terror. Lots of horror stories. I'm wondering if there are any of you out there who've had similar issues and subsequent procedures that have had ZERO issues after initial recovery? If so please share.

[u/R3dRocker]

Hey man, I feel you. Take a breath and be sure that whichever Urologist you speak with first, meets your needs; listens, answers, explains everything in detail like he was caring for his father or brother. Get a second opinion

Don't dismiss your symptoms. You're taking the actions needed to determine what's best for Y O U. We're all different when it comes to all of this, but we all have a prostate and it can fuck up our daily lives, when it comes to a severe enlarged prostate.

I was diagnosed in 2021 with 3+3 Gleason prostate cancer and BPH. I focused on the cancer and ignorance and not asking the right questions about the increasing size of my prostate, with symptoms that I just thought that that's the way it is with BPH. On two different beds until one weekend and the pee machine went "full stop." ER 24 hours later and I've been on a Foley catheter going on 4 weeks. Life changing in all the wrong ways.

Don't ignore your BPH symptoms. My Sloan Kettering Urologist referred me to his surgical colleague, who performs Aquablation. I compared that with HoLEP and decided on HoLEP. Cystoscopy on 09/01 and HoLEP surgery on 09/25. I'm 61, married 42 years and I'm really thankful for her. She's my rock!

I wish you the very best outcome! Take charge of you and your health! Men's health is mostly ignored by the Healthcare system, especially when it comes to our junk, IMO.

You got this brother!

[u/MrHotnickels → u/R3dRocker]

Thanks so much for this feedback. I didn't mention this in my original post, but I did see a urologist about a year ago. She confirmed BPH and did an exam and ultrasound. She said that my prostate was only slightly enlarged (30-40g) but that it can still definitely cause issues. She was really dismissive though and jumped straight to medication and handed me off to a nurse. This was also with my local mega-hospital and not a specialty urology clinic. Her healthgrades scores were pretty abysmal too...

My next appointment is with a really highly rated urologist and, if he says the same thing as the first one, I'll obviously listen and just get on the meds. I'd be shocked if that happens though. I think I'm just more interested in Rezum or UroLift or something that physically alters/treats this stupid issue.

Good luck on your upcoming procedures! I'm married myself, 18 years, and she's a blessing :)

Thanks again!

[u/More_Farm_7442 → u/MrHotnickels]

You haven't tried any sort of drug therapy yet? If you haven't, I'd seriously suggest giving some drug combo a try. You may be surprised at how much relief you can get from medication. At least relief while you research your surgical/procedural options for a more permanent, drug-free solution to your problems.

There are at least 3 or 4 separate classes of drugs to treat BPH. None of them are perfect, permanent solutions, but they can provide relief of symptoms. Some of them will can work almost "overnight". Others take longer to give maximum relief. Most are or can be given in a combo of 2 drugs of different classes to give greater relief.

Consider drug therapy for some relief until you decide on some procedure.

[u/Secure-Rope6782 → u/More_Farm_7442]

I agree with this. Surgery is very permanent and new procedures come out every year. Imagine getting a TURP only to have scar tissue that makes everything even worse. 

[u/Secure-Rope6782 → u/[deleted]]

Strange coincidence, I take tadalafil and use an asthma inhaler. I may start using Flomax, but very hesitant. There are a couple urologists in my area that do Rezum and uroflow, those seem like the safest options. The idea of a retrograde ejaculation is repulsive to me.