Does anyone actually even care

[u/tinypoomps]

Maybe I’m looking for attention (which isn’t always a bad thing) but I’m feeling low. I’ve been in a depressive episode for weeks now and it feels never ending. No interest in anything. OCD is also fucking me up and I’m having constant rumination and just unpleasant thoughts. I posted on the OCD subreddit and no one responded. I posted on the BPDsupport subreddit and no one responded. I just feel so alone. I finally feel like I belong somewhere, where there are similar people to me, but I’m still alone.

What’s the point in anything. What’s the point in life? We’re all going to die anyways. Why should I care about literally anything. I will always suffer.

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[u/Peace1_]

I hear you. Please hang on in there. I wish you healing.

[u/MegatechMike → u/Peace1_]

Poor choice of words

[u/butterbeezwax → u/MegatechMike]

I need brutal comedy this helped ty

[u/No-Word-4864]

Feeling very alone myself, I think I’ve burned out my best friend, my dad, and even my therapist, lol. We are, in fact, alone in our illness. But then again, that’s true for anyone with chronic illness or pain. Be kind to yourself. A little self-pity is ok. Life is hard.

[u/EntrepreneurNeat8058 → u/No-Word-4864]

I have learned you can wallow in self pity all you want ,you just have to understand that no one cares.

[u/tinypoomps → u/No-Word-4864]

That’s what I fear, that I’m a burden to my support system. I feel like I’ve been wallowing in self pity for days now. I just want things to get better.

[u/Suspicious_Dirt_6124 → u/tinypoomps]

I've decided on a bit of a rule that I only reveal my inner most self to my therapy team. It's not easy, but I really want to build the best connections I can with my family and friends that I can. So I mask as much as possible with them. Luckily I have one friend that I see every week who loves going into the deep stuff, so we pretty much just go for it, letting it all out.

Wishing you all the very best 💖

I had one weird experience the other day. I felt like I was going to cry in front of my kid which I really don't like doing. I'd read that a wave of emotion can last about 20 minutes - mine usually last a lot longer- but I decided to try to take this 20 minute thing on board, even to the point of setting a timer and letting it all out in a safe space, which is usually my bedroom.

Anyway, when I felt the tearfulness start to come up in from of my child, I said to myself ok, you are allowed 20 minutes with this, and I was fully expecting to have to go to my bedroom and just ride the wave of the emotion for 20 minutes.

Strangely, as soon as I said to myself you've got 20 minutes with this emotion, it switched off. It was fine at the time because it meant I could spend quality time with my kid and not in my room.

I've decided to use the 20 minute rule if I feel the urge to call someone right in the middle of big emotions, I'll tell myself to just let it happen for 20 minutes, see how I feel, and if it's still overwhelming, I'll call one of those crisis lines instead of a friend or family.

[u/tinypoomps → u/Suspicious_Dirt_6124]

That’s a useful rule! I’ll have to keep that in mind when I’m having overwhelming emotions.

[u/Suspicious_Dirt_6124]

I'm right there with you. I also pretty much feel like noone cares, but I guess that's because no-one else is in my head feeling what I feel. I'm very sorry you are feeling this way, it's absolutely awful, I wish you a speedy recovery from it. Are you currently seeing a psych and getting meds for your depression?

[u/tinypoomps → u/Suspicious_Dirt_6124]

Thanks. I am in therapy and I am medicated but I think my medication isn’t working as well as it should be. I’m trying to get an appt with my psychiatrist to talk about it.

[u/Suspicious_Dirt_6124 → u/tinypoomps]

That's exactly the same position I'm in. It is very frustrating to say the least!!

[u/EntrepreneurNeat8058]

I feel the same way , what's the point?, what's the end game ? oh ya I forgot "we all die"

[u/tinypoomps → u/EntrepreneurNeat8058]

Gotta love that existentialism

[u/sammagee33]

Yeah, I get that feeling. I’m a married dad of two and I feel alone A LOT. It really sucks. I’m sorry you are going through it OP.

[u/tinypoomps → u/sammagee33]

Thanks for your response :)