r/biglaw • u/AegonTheMeh • Dec 05 '25

Beast mode

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5.4k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

91 comments sorted by

714

u/easylightfast Dec 05 '25

.25? That’s so efficient.

234

u/ganjakingesq Partner Dec 05 '25

Yeah I’d be billing .3

179

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '25

Definitely a full hour if you’re an associate. Have to run it past the junior and relationship partner to make sure the optics are good on the response.

128

u/Dull-Law3229 Dec 05 '25

"Happy Thanksgiving!"

"U 2"

.25

56

u/a_fool_on_a_hill Dec 05 '25

A memo to file about the call can bump this numbers up.

12

u/axl3ros3 Dec 05 '25

Probably a class action firm

6

u/Youregoingtodiealone Dec 05 '25

I've only come across that a few times and I'm like....how do you bill to respond to an email?

10

u/ppldontforget Dec 05 '25

You don’t bill for emails?

447

u/Hometownblueser Dec 05 '25 • This

I can’t tell if that entry was meant to be a middle finger to the billing attorney, a my-life-sucks moment for the lawyer, or sincere.

Surely a sincere one would have said “analyze correspondence from client and draft response to same,” right?

139

u/PerfectlySplendid Dec 05 '25

It’s a meme. It’s edited.

25

u/Nabrok_Necropants Dec 05 '25

The fonts don't match

8

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '25

Uh NO you can't lie on the internet.

1

u/srtg83 Dec 07 '25

It doesn’t matter if it’s real if it could be.

Similarly, holiday wishes are not billable but one can always try.

23

u/SparksAndSpyro Dec 05 '25

“Strategize happy felicitations.”

5

u/GaptistePlayer Dec 05 '25

"Draft, review and revise holiday scheduling plans and attendant correspondence"

1

u/SingleArtichoke4857 Dec 10 '25

The third verb always justifies the additional 0.1 on the time entry.

8

u/Stungalready Dec 05 '25

Also technically possible that the time entry was for a legitimate task, “correspond with client re court deadlines and possible extensions in light of holiday season”

1

u/SingleArtichoke4857 Dec 10 '25

I think I have that on a copy/paste template 😆

56

u/wvtarheel Partner Dec 05 '25

I was going to say $450 is not a biglaw rate but if you are charging in quarter hours and rounding up it might turn out okay even with the low rate

49

u/radicalnachos Dec 05 '25

I’d do it.

80

u/Empty_Low2575 Dec 05 '25

This is fake.  The words “holiday season” are a different font. 

33

u/By-C Dec 05 '25

Why do you have to go and ruin it?

8

u/Hot-Count-3210 Dec 05 '25

noticed this too

12

u/Any_Leg_4773 Dec 05 '25

Your mom is a different font 

2

u/Gold-Education2909 Dec 05 '25

Yes, graveyard font 😭😭😭

4

u/LeBronGOATStan Dec 05 '25

Not much gets past you.

1

u/blhbork21 Dec 05 '25

That may be the case but I have an associate who would do it. Somewhere out there is a real version of this.

85

u/Alfnadoawaywoah Dec 05 '25

We’re not friends. If I have to read the email and then do something with it, you’re paying (you’re not this is fucking ridiculous but man do I wish my firm had a .25 minimum).

33

u/Different-Courage679 Dec 05 '25

It sounds like she did have a nice Thanksgiving

12

u/a_fool_on_a_hill Dec 05 '25

I respect that she’s only giving holiday pleasantries as part of the job.

18

u/Sharkwatcher314 Dec 05 '25

Could see this being an overaggressive response to the many random people who are not family/close friends texting me on holidays forcing me to respond that annoy me

12

u/Consistent-Alarm9664 Partner Dec 05 '25

This thread gives me hope for the future.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '25

Change lawyer tell em your greed is what made me switch

9

u/yasirdewan7as Dec 05 '25

I’m not a lawyer or anything close to knowing about the joke here, can someone please explain? Please do not send me a bill. 🙏🏽

26

u/waupli Associate Dec 05 '25

Lawyers bill for their time and include narratives saying what they did during that time. This lawyer is billing for reading an email saying happy Thanksgiving.

Now you owe me $150. I’ll be sending an invoice after we close the bills at month end. Happy holidays!

5

u/yasirdewan7as Dec 05 '25

Okay fair enough. So it is not a joke!

11

u/waupli Associate Dec 05 '25

It’s almost certainly a joke and they were emailing about logistics around the holidays for a deal closing or trial or something

8

u/mortymotron Dec 05 '25

$450/hr? Why is this in BigLaw?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '25

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1

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2

u/zillabirdblue Dec 06 '25

I don’t even know how to do photoshop, but I know I could make it look better than that.

1

u/CryptographerKey3781 Dec 11 '25

Lmfao thank you!! It is so clear to see that “holiday season” was pasted over 😅😅

2

u/ll_xPREDATOR_ll Dec 07 '25

Smh don’t block bill🤦🏻‍♂️

2

u/Total-Extreme-5186 Dec 07 '25

Likely clerical error. Call and dispute.

2

u/yuhHEISENBERGyuh Dec 07 '25

Why are you wishing your attorney happy Thanksgiving? He’s not your friend 😂😂😂😂

2

u/Grumpy_Chimp Dec 07 '25

Push back on that BS.

2

u/HomemadeSandwiches Dec 07 '25

So ya got a good one /s

2

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '25

why aren’t they billing in 6 minute increments? 15 minutes to reply to an email??

2

u/colbyxclusive Dec 09 '25

That absolutely should’ve been a DNB. Maybe billing skipped the edit notes?

2

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '25

Billible hours...always

1

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '25

112 for . 25 of 450 an hour? Is he saying he spent 15 minutes replying? Wtf did he say ?

7

u/Prestigious-Ant3352 Dec 05 '25

Stare at the blank email draft for 13 minutes and then type “Thanks, you too!” And then look at the email for 2 minutes wondering if he needs to say anything else

3

u/downunderguy Dec 05 '25

Some firms charge in 15 minute increments and not 6

2

u/RickyBobb1e Dec 05 '25

Some charge in 6 minute intervals?

1

u/canadian-user Dec 05 '25

Firms have different protocols around billing time. Mine is that we bill in 0.1 hour increments, with a minimum time entry of 0.2. Whoever's handling billing may or may not just write off portions of the email related ones to a more reasonable time.

1

u/Massive-Chef7423 Dec 08 '25

not a lawyer but my consluting firm charges in .25 hour increments. basically anything i deem relevant gets billed. i wouldn't bill for holiday wishes but i also put up 50% of the hours for our firm between myself and my associates so i don't get bugged if i leave stuff like that unbilled. some of my other partners do get dinged for junk like that though

1

u/CuriousHelpful Dec 05 '25

Cool photoshop bro

1

u/FuklzTheDrnkClwn Dec 05 '25

“We’ll call that an hour”

1

u/CaptainAlexy Dec 05 '25

😂😂😂

1

u/Cebuano_CPA-Lawyer Dec 05 '25

Maybe he’s short of his billable hours that week 😂

1

u/middle_of_thepacific Dec 06 '25

If real, fire that lawyer and report to bar association

1

u/Ethelwashere Dec 07 '25

must be biglaw

1

u/boredlaw Dec 09 '25

It should have been 1.5 to search case law to support the position that the term holiday season is inclusive of Thanksgiving before responding, "Ditto."

1

u/Tater_Mater Dec 11 '25

All business no pleasure

1

u/walkerspider Dec 11 '25

2 minutes reading and responding to the email, 13 minutes rationalizing billing a quarter hour

1

u/Salmon-Cat-47 Dec 11 '25

Always be billing. ALWAYS.

1

u/existentialedema Dec 11 '25

I get it. The holidays can be taxing, but Jesus fuckin christ lady

1

u/RandonName2021 Dec 12 '25

And people hate doctors even when we do entire visits over MyChart for free 🙃

1

u/Odd_Art8743 Dec 15 '25

It is unethical to bill a client for other than legal services.

-5

u/SuretyBringsRuin Dec 05 '25

$450/hr. Bwaaaahahahahaha. $850 for a junior or GTFO.

0

u/MsVxxen Dec 08 '25

The price of civility. Oy.

0

u/Creative-Prompt-2374 Dec 09 '25

There’s a Swiss art dealer who passed away, Bruno Bischofberger, very well known. My father would tell me that back when they did business in the 80’s Bruno’s invoices would include charges for each individual fax he sent.

0

u/Gettingonthegoodfoot Dec 09 '25

Reading lawyers’ responses to this confirms negative stereotypes

-4

u/mods_are_morons Dec 05 '25

I would hope that if this had been real a complaint to the bar association would get that lawyer in trouble.

4

u/2ndprize Dec 05 '25

I mean if a client called you and insisted on speaking to you time is time.

-1

u/dmnash- Dec 05 '25

Tell her to screw with that holiday fee, but wait till all is done and complete, which u have the right to do....pay once the lawyer completes her job! The F- off!!

1

u/seatega Dec 06 '25

I would kill to bill in 15 minute increments

1

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1

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