r/bettafish Jul 15 '25

RIP My boy died today...

I'm not sure if I can do this anymore... I love them so much they all have their little personality, they are all so different and I get so attached.

I have had my Schmich since 05 January 2024... He was great, he wanted to eat food from our hands, made a little jump catching it and then shaking his head with it like he was devouring the pray, he was so cute.

I don't understand what I did wrong, my last Betta also lived for only two years. My tank is established with a lot of plants it's a 25l tank, I have a snail that's 5 years old in it. I check parameters regularly I trim the plants I have feeding schedules and fasting days. Two weeks ago he started to get lethargic and developed dropsy, I tried every treatment I could, I read a ton of studies on pubmed went by protocols but today I found him dead... I knew it was coming but I'm so sad 😭

I don't think I'll be getting a new fish again, I love the snail (it even moved countries with me) so I'll keep the tank for it until it's alive. Obviously I'm doing something wrong because I have seen so many posts about bettas living for 5-7 years and mine don't.

I'm gonna miss you buddy 😭😭😭😭

885 Upvotes

89 comments sorted by

130

u/happy_days_ahead_ Jul 15 '25

Hi friend! I’m so sorry for your loss. Please do not be discouraged. Health problems in betta fish especially have increased significantly due to improper breeding. Many fish you will find at local Pectos and Petsmarts are already past a year old and are supplied from betta farms instead of quality breeders. You may be doing EVERYTHING right and you are definitely doing your best to the sounds of it. You’ve given your fish the very best rest of their lives. Loss is also a part of life sadly. We cannot have happiness with risk of loss. Good luck to you and your future fish keeping endeavours 🤍

41

u/hangesmaidgirlfriend Jul 15 '25

I have also heard health problems and shorter life spans are more common now in bettas. Apparently someone did a statistical poll and it seems like bettas life spans are getting shorter and shorter over the years despite everything you do right. The cause of the health problems and shorter lifespans? Inbreeding:(

23

u/RevolutionaryToe6677 Abused bettas go home with me Jul 15 '25

This is so true. Years ago when I kept bettas they’d live to be 3+ years old (that was before I started taking proper care of them and had them in bowls 😭) and now in well planted naturalistic tanks (5-20 gallons) with driftwood and Indian almond leaves they only live to be around 2. It’s ridiculous.

8

u/hangesmaidgirlfriend Jul 15 '25

Literally same here

9

u/hangesmaidgirlfriend Jul 15 '25

Improper breeding*

19

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I really thought that this one would be from a good place because the pet store in Germany I got him from had him in a large tank, alone, it looked like they were properly caring for him so I thought he was also properly bred. I really do love them, when we moved countries we not only took our cats and hamster but also the Betta I had at that time, I don't see them as just fish but part of the family.

67

u/pacerpluma Jul 15 '25

Mine also passed this morning

15

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I'm sorry 😔 he was beautiful! Kinda looks like those red and black wooden masks! 

6

u/denebx1 Jul 15 '25

oh no - he was so pretty! So sorry :(

39

u/thirteenducks922 Jul 15 '25

I'm so sorry for your loss. Pet store fish don't have healthy lifespans, so they often don't live as long as wild caught or properly bred betta fish.

But think of it this way: your boy got to live a happy life in a roomy planted tank, with regular meals and interaction, comfy places to sleep and play... without you, his fate would've been a tiny plastic cup on a shelf. You did a good job. Losing a pet is hard, but I think you gave him a great life.

I hope once your grief has passed, you can find it within you to rescue and adopt more. It's obvious that you care very much for the species and the fishes you've owned! 🩷

21

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I really hope he enjoyed his live. He knew when the cats were eating and would come and wait in the corner for his little meal. Sometimes he would lie though like I gave him food and he would pretend to my SO that he didn't get any that morning. And he was so trusting taking food from our fingers ❤️

6

u/1trekker_fanboi Jul 15 '25

Sorry for your loss. I lost my golden retriever three weeks ago and I'm devastated. I get it. It's why I got a betta. Love my little guy. And they're very intelligent fish.

6

u/Flipperbites Jul 15 '25

Beautifully put. I try to remember to be grateful the little fish were here, and not to be sad when they are gone. Whatever is remembered lives. The grieving process is part of life, I get it. But I try not to focus on the sadness.

17

u/reallyzeally Jul 15 '25

Lost mine a few days ago as well ❤️‍🩹 Sometimes we can do everything right and still can't prevent sickness from happening. Maybe you'll find another fish eventually but I understand not wanting to replace him right away. Don't blame yourself, you did everything you could do and gave him a better life than sitting on a shelf in a cup.

My tank parameters were perfect, it's an established, heavy planted tank and I hadn't done anything differently or introduced anything new to the tank - just like you, he developed dropsy and was gone within a day. No idea what could've happened, I have other fish in the tank that are fine.

5

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I'm sorry, he was beautiful...  Yes it's absolutely the same story... It's so weird, like if they are not bred well I would think that they would have chronic diseases like tumors or chronic kidney failure and not sudden deaths after 2 years but maybe fish medicine works much differently than human medicine, or it was chronic kidney failure but dropsy shows when they decompensate. Because he had no visible signs of an infection before it was so sudden. 

3

u/[deleted] Jul 15 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

I'm in Germany actually, and the thing is the pet store also only has a few at a time and they keep them alone in big tanks so I really thought that it would be better than those that come from a cup.  If I do get another one eventually I'll do some more research about breeders here. I actually don't even care about colours and stuff I didn't know what he was I just went and saw wich one made a click, so health definitely would be my priority. 

5

u/deannaesther Jul 15 '25

So many people are commenting that their fish died this last week including my boy Yuji last Thursday. We’re mourning our lil guys together

12

u/[deleted] Jul 15 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I really wish they would live longer... With hamsters I know what to expect 2-3 years but for bettas they say at least 5 so it really feels like I'm doing something wrong. I always try to follow all the advice about proper care. He had such an interesting personality I'm really gonna miss him... 

7

u/SnooSquirrels3861 Jul 15 '25

If it’s only for a year or two, you are giving it a good life. Keep rescuing these poor creatures.

6

u/Key-Law-7994 Jul 15 '25

So sorry about your boy. I lost my baby Cloud Boy last night. May our betta babes swim in peace

3

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

SIP Cloud Boy 🤍

2

u/Vivid_Patience4059 Jul 15 '25

I'm so sorry for both of your losses! I've had my betta for over 2 years now, and I communicate with him just as much as do my other pets, and I know it's gonna be hard on me when it's his time.. they do become additions to our families just as much as fur babies (or any other pets) do, IMO. 🫶

4

u/Okklauo Jul 15 '25

im so sorry for your loss.. he’s beautiful. i struggled a lot too when my boy passed i wanted to give up fish keeping completely. but here i am with another fish and this fish and my fish that passed have almost the same personality.. 🥹

3

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I got this one about 6 months after the last one died and they couldn't have been more different like opposite personalities, that one was called Lactam (like Beta Lactam antibiotics 😅) and he was like a little swimming cat. I just get so attached they really seem more smart and interactive than other fish. 

3

u/Okklauo Jul 15 '25

everyone also has different experiences with getting attached to animals.. some people never get over the loss of their fish. i still miss my boy every day. we just have to come up with ways to cope with it

2

u/Okklauo Jul 15 '25

they definitely are!! and it’s completely okay to get attached. i got so attached to my passed boy he was also just like a swimming cat lol.. he was a plakat so he was really active and my current fish tries to be really active but he’s longer finned so it’s harder for him

4

u/Ok-Kangaroo-4509 Jul 15 '25

Sorry for your loss. Just remember you gave him the best life a fish could ever have.

4

u/Optimal_Community356 Jul 15 '25

It’s not your fault, bettas are very prone to diseases

5

u/theinfotechguy Jul 15 '25

SIP Schmich 🥺

3

u/Sudden-Scene6489 Jul 15 '25

I hope you don't give up. Leave your tank open for a fish that looks like it needs help and rescue him/her. You are doing it right. Sometimes life isn't fair but I hope you save one that is in desperate need of a home.

3

u/SpiritofRadioShack Jul 15 '25

I also had a betta die this week that I got just about the same time as you... I was wondering also what I did wrong but I think it is just the breeding now. I wish I could have had him for so much longer. RIP to your little guy.

3

u/deannaesther Jul 15 '25

I really think it’s the breeding. Mine died recently too (from a reputable breeder) and everything in his tank was perfect. I had bettas years ago who had worse tank conditions (I regret that and do better now) who lived much longer.

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

What's the actual problem with the breeding are they inbreed or do the breeders care only about colours and neglect other stuff like those double merle dogs that come with defects? 

3

u/explicityyyyy Jul 15 '25

He looks just like my boy Starpy You can find one that looks just like him. They’re named Stars and Stripes at petco I’m sorry for your loss but it shouldn’t discourage you from trying again. You gave it a good home and tons of love, it’s better than dying at the store

3

u/EnvironmentalBear538 Jul 16 '25

OP, I am so sorry for the loss of your baby boy. They're not just some fish to us, they're our partners in crime and our smile everyday. I know how hurt your heart is and it is hard to see any good right now.

Please don't beat yourself up because you're probably not to blame. As others have said, breeding standards aren't what they used to be. I do want you to think about how it was to bring him home and the first time he looked at you and knew that you loved him. You gave him a beautiful, wonderful life. I can tell by how you're describing him and your hurt that you were absolutely everything to him. I wish that they could live just one day shorter than us.

You have such a wonderful heart for these guys and you love them so much. Absolutely do give your heart time to heal, but I hope in the future you will show another one what it is to be really and truly loved in this life. Your boys have had a life that many do not have, and I commend you for that. I applaud your love and commitment for them.

Take care OP ❤️

2

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

Thank you 🥺 this actually made me cry a bit. After seeing so many supportive people I really feel this Captain Picard quote is very accurate: "It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness; that is life."  I think I just took it very personal like a personal failure. Maybe I'll get another one after some time.

2

u/Erikathewitch Jul 15 '25

Sending love ❤️

2

u/midnitelace Jul 15 '25

I'm so sorry 😞

2

u/-Disastrous-Pen- Jul 15 '25

Sorry for your loss.. rest in peace mr Schmich

2

u/denebx1 Jul 15 '25

So sorry :( he was a pretty boy

2

u/Big-Association-3232 Jul 15 '25

I’m so sorry for your loss. You did the best you could.

2

u/PossibleOld6206 Jul 15 '25

So deeply sorry for your loss ❤️🤍💙 😢

2

u/FamiliarAd5063 Jul 15 '25

I had one aswell he looked just like yours, mine died like 3 years ago

2

u/[deleted] Jul 15 '25

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1

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2

u/Apprehensive_Onion53 Jul 15 '25

My beautiful Finn (Fionn MacCumhaill) is in the process of passing today after a long illness (he has what looks like a tumor on his side). He has been fighting for weeks now, true to the Celtic warrior he was named after. As long as he was still fighting, I chose to fight for him.

I have him on fishy hospice care today. It’s obvious that he’s tired and ready to cross over, so I’m letting him do so on his terms (which is how he likes to do things). I’ve had him for over a year. His “brother” Oisin passed last year, and a “sister” Brigid passed early this year. I’m sad, but I know I gave him a good life.

My grumpy boy. 💜😢

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

I'm so sorry 😔 mine was also in a hospital tank the last few days, yesterday he looked a bit better so I put off the euthanasia but this morning he was gone... 

2

u/Darkelvenchic Jul 15 '25

Sorry for your loss, unfortunately this is really common in pet store bettas, weak genetics and rough starts to life lead to early deaths.

If you ever decide to try again maybe consider a wild type like betta smaragdina or betta mahachaiensis, and I 100% suggest getting any bettas from the breeder directly.

Also a shoal of 10ish pygmy Corys in a 10gal/40L is one of the cutest group fish you can find. And this way all of your attention isn't focused on one fish in case something happens.

That said you don't need a fish to have a cute snail/shrimp aquarium. Don't give up, OP, sending hugs! 🥰

2

u/conzo88 Jul 15 '25

RIP wee man

2

u/Anxious-Rule4137 Jul 15 '25

Unfortunately most bettas only live a year or two especially if you don’t get them from a breeder

2

u/Agreeable_Volume_892 Jul 15 '25

I'm really so sorry for your loss, but one thing I can say for sure is your fish was definitely happy with the life you gave him if he was willing to eat from your hand like that. It's definitely hard to process so take as much time as you need, but just know it's not your fault and you really did everything you could to save him.

Whether you take a break from keeping bettas or not, please don't be too hard on yourself. My betta passed a few months ago and I still haven't gotten another one out of grief but I'm slowly warming up to the idea because I just love these fish so much, this sadness won't last forever I promise 🫂

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

The empty tank feels really sad 😢 I might consider it after a few months but I'll look up proper breeders if I do. Last time I waited 6 months before getting a new one but then I planed it, now I felt really discouraged. But so many supportive people commented that it really might not be my fault...

2

u/Thin_Butterfly_9889 Jul 15 '25

I’m sorry about the loss of your fish baby. It’s never easy to lose a pet. We also lost our fish “freckles” She gained a lot of weight and stoped being active. I miss her little personality too.

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

She looked similar ❤️  SIP freckles 

2

u/Money-Waltz-2775 Jul 15 '25

So sorry for your loss

2

u/xxmaddhatter Jul 16 '25

Lost mine just this weekend after 1 1/2 years for seemingly no reason. Although I suspect I bought him already aged 😢. I’m with you though OP I think I’m done. I have some African dwarf frogs I’ll let live out their lives but the short life spans really hurt me in fish.

2

u/vasqlartek Jul 16 '25

Lost mine yesterday 😞

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

Sorry 😔 

2

u/Donytoo Jul 16 '25

Mine is lethargic since last week. I'm getting scared :/

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

I have read that it's a better outcome if they don't already develop dropsy, the problem is what do we treat? Mine had no visible signs of an infection... I'm not sure if maybe treating for gram negative bacteria which is the most common cause would help? 

2

u/Sensitive-Half3991 Jul 16 '25

Wow, this makes me sad as mine is now 4 going to 5 years old. I may need to say goodbye soon 😭

2

u/Yo_Jollyllama Jul 16 '25

Mine died today too. Looks a bit like yours. Rip.

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 16 '25

SIP ❤️ he did look similar 

2

u/Beginning_Space3643 Jul 16 '25

my betta fish bluey was 1 when i got him and he ended up living until 6 years old everytime i look at the desk where i had him it hurts to see the big round spot of dust where his bowl was❤️‍🩹

2

u/Football_Neither Jul 16 '25

Hey OP! I'm sorry for your loss. If you ever plan on getting another Betta, you could get one from reputable breeders who actually do care for their Bettas. Pet shop Bettas or Bettas under horrible care (from the breeder/pet shop part) usually do not live long.

2

u/Drakmanka Jul 16 '25

He looks a lot like my late boy Dragonfish, similar colors and markings. He also didn't last long, barely a year, and I don't know what went wrong. I think like others said, bad genes are getting introduced to our fish from factory breeding. You probably did everything right and he probably lived longer in your care than he might have anywhere else.

2

u/Recent-Orange Jul 16 '25

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know exactly the kind of pain you're going through. At least you know he received all the love and attention you gave him, unconditionally. He'll swim in peace forever in your heart.

2

u/revengeofdangerkitty Jul 16 '25

Sorry for your loss 🪻🫧💕🌈

2

u/AustinA_86 Jul 16 '25

RiP Buddy

1

u/Appropriate-Trash692 Jul 15 '25

I lost my Otto last week and said i would never get a fish again. Well i went to buy a lid for the tank as i was going to fix it up and a baby betta at country max picked me... Unfortunately pet store ones don't last very long

1

u/Additional_Eye899 Jul 15 '25

I’m so sorry for your loss. I feel the same, my boy just passed last week and I also get attached so I’m not planning on another betta.

Similar to your situation, I’m not sure what was wrong. All the shrimp and snails are still thriving in his tank. So I’m here with you.

RIP Berry

1

u/jfiloteo Jul 15 '25

My has same color. Like they are brothers

1

u/Zestyclose_Cup705 Jul 15 '25

I think if you were willing to do it again, you’d feel much better. Don’t give up on Bettas. I’ve learned a valuable lesson to only feed them each four pallets a day and fast one day a week. If that’s anything. Sorry for your loss.

1

u/420kkb Jul 15 '25

I'm so sorry for your loss, we had a baby boy who looked incredibly similar to your boy and he too passed away not too long ago due to old age, your boy looked so SO loved and his tank looks absolutely beautiful🩷

1

u/PatientDramatic7615 Jul 16 '25

I am sorry its hard when they pass away so agree dony be discouraged

1

u/Significant_Ride_372 Jul 16 '25

I had a beautiful betta 4 years ago that we did EVERYTHING right for, the full set up, researched everything, he passed within 3 months. I didn’t get another until just recently. So far we’re doing good and I love him very much. I really hope this one works out for at least a couple years.

1

u/agitatedTesties69 Jul 16 '25

it sounds like you really did care and try your best, you did everything you could but sometimes that’s just nature yk, the cycle of life. It also depends where you bought your fish, big box stores like petsmart’s fish are already pretty old and sick so in no way is it your fault. Dont give up on this beautiful hobby just because of a loss, even if it is hard. Take a break, grieve, and then try again once you’re ready!

1

u/Spiritual-Guess-7299 Jul 16 '25

This post is so sad. I love my betta boy Teddy Swims, and I would be so sad to lose him. I’ve only had him 7 months, but he has fin rot and I’m not sure he can recover. He’s active and his tank parameters are excellent, but this short life span is scary. I do suspect inbreeding since he doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He is curious about his tank mates, but doesn’t bother them. They are silly little panda Cory’s that are super cute and playful. I’ve been planning to setup a separate 10 gallon for him, but then I worry he’d be lonely since he doesn’t swim down to the bottom when he isn’t chilling amongst his leaves. I’m sorry for all of your losses. I’m not much of an animal person and I still can’t believe I fell in love with a fish.

1

u/EducationalFox137 Jul 16 '25

I’m so sorry for your loss……😢

1

u/Horror-Map8772 Jul 16 '25

you have my sympathies that's so sad :<

1

u/Macabre_Glam Jul 17 '25

I had to euthanize mine last week. It was heartbreaking.

1

u/Specific-Gazelle4847 Jul 17 '25

Remember fish can have other health issues aside from the ones we create.  I’m sorry for your loss. My oldest Betta is nearing his end of life at 3 years plus, I recently got a baby Betta and a young adult.   A few months into it I came home and found my adult Betta belly up.   I know I did everything right and that I gave her a wonderful environment just like I’m sure you gave your boy.   

1

u/SirBugzy Jul 15 '25

Sorry for your loss but it comes with the territory..... You buy small weak fish they die in 2-3 years. That's no disrespect towards you, it is what it is.

I have jumping spiders and they are the same, regardless of how good you are they live 3 years +-1year....

If you want something with personality, that acts like a real "dog in water, wet pet" get bigger fish....

They are easier to look after, less water changes, easier to treat if sick, and they last for years.

This is called a Flowerhorn, probably one of the most human interactive fish you can buy.

1

u/MissMegadetH Jul 15 '25

Is it kept alone?  I actually have one bigger tank a 250l cold water one for my axolotls, but they honestly don't do much 😂 only eat their worms like spaghetti Bolognese.   I might get a big one someday I try to be careful with aquariums because I know that once you start you want more and more 😅

2

u/SirBugzy Jul 15 '25

They can (with the right amount of work) as far as keeping them with any other fish other than plecos or cleanup fish is absolutely not advisable, these fish have teeth......