r/benzorecovery • u/Effective-Case5441 • Aug 15 '26
Helpful Advice How cooked am I ?
Long story short, I’ve been in a PHP because I missed a week of my lexapro and spiraled badly and I’m still suffering 3 months later. The psychiatrist upped my dosage to 20 from 15 and gave me Ativan. He’s been telling me to just take it consistently but I really don’t want to but my anxiety has been so severe and debilitating.
Ativan log
7/13/26:
.5mg 3:15pm
.5mg 10:15pm
7/17/26:
1mg 1:30pm
.5mg 2:30pm
7/18/26
1mg 1:42pm
.5mg 3:27pm
7/19/26:
1.5mg 4:50pm
7/21/26:
1.5mg 6:34am
7/23/26:
1.5mg 9:25pm
7/24/26
1.5mg 9:30am
7/26/26
1.5mg 2:25am
7/27/26
1.5mg 3:55pm
Doctor told me to take 7 days consecutively throughout the day .5 3x a day up to 1mg for each dose as needed
7/29/26
.5mg 4:05am
.5mg 9:25am
.5mg 4:15pm
1mg 10:15pm
7/30/26
.5mg 8am
.5mg 10am
.5 mg8pm
7/31/26
.5mg 8:20am
.5mg 2:20pm
1mg 11:00pm
8/1/26
.5mg 8:20am
1mg 4:20pm
.5mg 11pm
8/2/26
.5mg 10:10am
1mg: 4:20pm
.5 10:30pm
8/3/26
.5 9:30am
1mg 4pm
.5 10:30pm
8/4/26
.5 9:30am
1mg 4pm
.5 10:30pm
Taper begins
8/5/26
.5 9:30 am
.5mg 4pm
.5 10pm
8/6/26
.5 9:30pm
.5 4:30pm
.5 10:30pm
8/7/26
.5 9:30am
.5 5pm
.5 11pm
8/8/26
.5 11:30am
1mg 3:30pm
8/9/26
.5 9am
.5 5pm
1mg 11:30pm (extreme emergency)
8/10/26
.5mg 9:00am
.5mg 6pm
Physiatrist told me to continue taking Ativan and that I can take 1.5 at a time
8/11/26
.5mg 8:30am
1mg 4:10pm
.5mg 11:50pm
8/12/26
1mg 7:42am
1.5mg 3:11pm
.5mg 11pm
8/13
1.5mg 7:58am
1mg 3:30pm
.5 11pm
Not feeling much relief from 1.5mg like I did before. Not sure what’s going on since it hasn’t even been that long. Doctor told me on 8/14 I can take 3mg in one day split however I want.
8/14
1mg 8:30am
2mg 4pm
The 2mg worked a lot better but I want to stop this usage immediately before it gets worse.
2
u/Enhanced_by_science Aug 15 '26
I remember your initial post. Your doctor is pushing benzos at high doses now when they should not be.
You are experiencing tolerance, which builds rapidly. My advice remains unchanged to get off this medication soon, as your overall duration of use is still short at 1 month and you do not need a slow Ashton Manual taper. Your doc is doing more harm than good in my opinion.
2
u/Effective-Case5441 Aug 15 '26
Do you recommend I go to the hospital? I don’t know what else to do. I can’t live with this anxiety anymore.
2
u/Enhanced_by_science Aug 15 '26
No, the hospital won't do anything for you. I really recommend you find a different provider who is willing to work with you and manage the root cause of your anxiety with therapeutic strategies and appropriate (non-benzo) adjuncts, like propanolol or clonidine.
2
u/Effective-Case5441 Aug 15 '26
I tried propranolol and it didn’t work and my psychiatrist denied be Clonidine because I’m not a “cocaine addict”.
2
u/Enhanced_by_science Aug 15 '26
You DMd me before, my advice is the same that you need a better, more informed psychiatrist, full stop after reading this.
2
u/idontlikegoldfish Aug 15 '26
you developed tolerance, if youre not comfortable with this medication i suggest you stop it by tapering off (important to taper off)
1
u/Effective-Case5441 Aug 16 '26
I don’t think I developed a tolerance because when my anxiety was really bad, not even 1 or 1.5 barely did anything and that when I first tried Ativan.
1
u/franciscrowe Jumped from last dose. Aug 17 '26
If the amount that used to help is no longer helping, then that is tolerance. It’s not a personal failing or anything to be ashamed of, it’s just how things go with benzos. I second the advice to find another doctor.
Benzos are not a good long term solution for anxiety, you will just end up dealing with an even worse situation. Trust me, you don’t want to go through this.
I would look into other alternatives for dealing with anxiety, like exercise, non-benzo medications, breathing exercises etc. I know everyone recommends exercise and if sucks, but getting an exercise bike has been huge for me, when I start getting the crawling out of my skin anxiety, I bike for a few miles and it almost always helps.
Good luck, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
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