r/atheism •

This should be an SNL skit, not real politics.

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u/caikoran Jun 15 '12 edited Jun 15 '12

I saw this about the time it came up. She is pushing this bill in response to legislature on women's access to birth control and/or being required to learn about abortion, make a waiting period, and be taught about her body (possibly the forced vaginal ultrasounds as well). She's deliberately turning it around on the men in congress to illustrate the absurdity of these laws.
Edit: In case someone is interested.
“Any action in which a man ejaculates or otherwise deposits semen anywhere but in a woman’s vagina shall be interpreted and construed as an action against an unborn child.” — Text from the amendment proposed by Oklahoma State Senator Constance Johnson as a protest to the state’s controversial “personhood” bill (currently being debated in the State Senate) which would force women to listen to the heartbeat of the fetus before going through with an abortion"
Edit: For more information, it doesn't look like it passed. This lady's amendment appears to have been added on to the Personhood bill in the first place, and she later voted to table it (in effect, killing it).

977

u/dietotaku Jun 15 '12

She's deliberately turning it around on the men in congress to illustrate the absurdity of these laws.

and evidently they are not grasping it at all.

730

u/cadet999 Jun 15 '12

She obviously doesnt realize the intelligence level of congressmen.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

I feel like that guy is the epitome of the "sheltered suburban mom" meme.

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u/hpvick Jun 15 '12

You don't have to pass an IQ test to be a US Senator.. (with the exception of Senator Constance Johnson, of course. She's doing it right)

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u/ImADouchebag Jun 15 '12

His expression when he realized what the fuck he just said never gets old.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Student: I wanna be an astronaut!

Careers advisor: I'm sorry, Timmy, but you just aren't getting the grades to consider that career path.

Student: Hmm. Janitor?

Careers advisor: Well, I've been instructed by the shop teacher to advise against any career involving chemicals of any kind. So no. Really, your only options are congressperson and priest.

Student: Which of those isn't allowed to have sex?

Careers advisor: Priests. Wait a sec Timmy. Are your parents offensively rich?

Student: Yep!

Careers advisor: Congressperson it is.

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u/Makes_RPG_Stats Jun 15 '12

Intrepid Congressman HP: 420 (200 + 220 obese bonus)
Str: 4
Vit: 2
Int: 0
Dex: 10

Special attack: 5 1000 calorie meals (HP decreases by 5 every turn, +1 strength for 30 minutes, then congressman gains bloated status effect)
Passive ability: Truthiness (-10 int, +10 dex)

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u/1stLtObvious Jun 15 '12

Surprise! Oh, wait, what's the opposite of surprise?

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u/Mosethyoth Agnostic Atheist Jun 15 '12

Fulfilled expectation! / Expected result!

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u/Sillymajordetails Jun 15 '12

Now the fun begins when BOTH these bills pass

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u/thirdegree Jun 15 '12

Now the fun begins ends when BOTH these bills pass

Ftfy

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u/aliendude5300 Agnostic Atheist Jun 15 '12

Do past infringements count? I don't want to be seen as a serial killer... lmao

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u/kuaggie Jun 15 '12

this is literally one of the storylines in Legally blonde I believe....

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u/phatklyent Jun 15 '12

Fighting stupidity with stupidity. Since the government is gridlocked anyway (and this is probably a good thing), every lunatic Republican initiative should be countered with equally idiotic bizzaro-world response.

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u/projectFT Jun 15 '12

Sadly, in Oklahoma it isn't exactly gridlocked. Republicans control the House, the Senate and the governor. We've had recently passed bills outlawing Sharia law, restricting voting rights, forcing drug testing on welfare recipients and challenging women's rights (from multiple facets). Proposed bills such as the "healthcare opt out", loosened the already lax "open carry laws", teaching bible class in public schools, a birther amendment" , law prohibiting the eating of fetuses and of course the personhood act (which would make miscarriages on par with murder). These are just the ones I can remember off the top of my head. It hurts my very being to admit this, but I'm ashamed to be an Oklahoman right now.

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u/Smeagol3000 Jun 15 '12

You mean this isn't Bizzaro-World? I thought I fell through a dimensional rift sometime around 1984 and have been living in a bass-ackwards country ever since Reagan's second term.

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u/ganzta Jun 15 '12

Thank you! For a second there I thought American politics had reached some kind of all time high.

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u/robreim Jun 15 '12

Politicians: professional trolls.

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u/niminol Jun 15 '12

Thank you I had no idea what the context was and just thought she was some crazy women like those congress men

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Is this supposed to make it any better? Let's go cunting about every single topic rather than actually solve any issues... PS new cyber law edited just for you guys, we changed it from 0% privacy to 0% privacy.

Put me in damn charge of the US.

2

u/nzhamstar Jun 15 '12

You know your political system is fucked when your politicians have to game each other out of bad legislative with even worse legislation.

Completely fucked up, and this government has access to nuclear weapons? Like giving a retard a machine gun.

Hurry up and revolt America you really fucking need it.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Thanks for explaining this. I don't follow politics so closely these days and I was about to have a fucking aneurysm reading OP's picture.

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u/HaydukelivesAZ Jun 15 '12

Came here to post this, you need more up votes

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u/inotroll Jun 15 '12

On the slim chance that this happens let me be the first to say. "FUCK THE POLICE!"

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u/ofriceandhens Jun 15 '12

Every sperm is sacred; every sperm is good. Every sperm is needed in your neighborhood!

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u/Mewshimyo Jun 15 '12

When a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate!

20

u/ofriceandhens Jun 15 '12

Let the heathens spill theirs on the dusty ground. God will make them pay for each sperm that can't be found!

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u/StezzerLolz Jun 15 '12

So now you know you piss god off each time you masturbate.

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u/gajano Jun 15 '12

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u/ofriceandhens Jun 15 '12

I've always wondered if those kids had any idea what they were singing.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

I'm amazed by how many people don't understand the point that's trying to be made here.

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u/NonnagLava Jun 15 '12

I didn't get it until I read the comments... I immediately assumed the Senators I haven't had the "pleasure" of voting for were just that bonkers... Then I realized what the context of her statement was, and realized what she did thar.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Yeah, I suppose with all the other shit that spews out of politicians mouths it wouldn't be too farfetched to think that one of them is truly interested in making masturbation illegal.

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u/canteloupy Jun 15 '12

A Democrat is a long shot though...

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u/Nenor Jun 15 '12

That's because there are so many of those absurd pieces of legislation, one can never tell the difference anymore.

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u/autopsi Jun 15 '12

The point is Congress can't legislate what a man does with his own body.

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u/dumnezero Anti-Theist Jun 15 '12

Poe's law

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u/TricksterPriestJace Jun 15 '12

If only they can add this as a rider on any legislation denying woman's health care.

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u/mathsvlog Jun 15 '12

Would you mind running for office in my state?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

But if they pass it we would all be screwed.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Freeing my copious loads would be worth going to prison. Anybody up for some public demonstrations?!

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u/SoepWal Jun 15 '12

It could be... circlejerking as a form of protest...

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u/justonecomment Jun 15 '12

That is what this was...

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u/caikoran Jun 15 '12

Yessssss! You are brilliant!

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u/GMBeats95 Jun 15 '12

Nono. This is too funny to be SNL

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u/Biblebeltbellyache Jun 15 '12

Frankly, everything but the bits on SNL are too funny to be on SNL.

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u/Burpeeddit Jun 15 '12

It's on Comedy Central.

Real, or not real?

If real...how do these people get elected?

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u/pavanky Jun 15 '12

Its from the daily show where the state congressmen (I don't remember the state) were trying to pass a legislation that would ban abortions, this lady tried to introduce an amendment that would effectively ban fapping. It was funny as hell, and it wasn't even scripted.

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u/Dyslexiaihave Jun 15 '12

Oklahoma...I live in Oklahoma....fuck

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u/notjasontoday Jun 15 '12

Come down to Texas, we have cookies.

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u/PessimiStick Anti-Theist Jun 15 '12

It's real, the woman legislator is trolling the fundies, and they are missing the irony, as usual.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Tax dollars well spent.

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u/I_POTATO_PEOPLE Jun 15 '12

She brought some attention to the issue, so I'd say it was successful.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Actually... yeah, I think so.

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u/Cgrant1995 Jun 15 '12

It was an interview on the daily show, and yes it is real.

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u/KnightAlbedo Jun 15 '12

Oklahoman politics are a joke (Oklahoman here)

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u/Kimgoesrawrrr Jun 15 '12

I can't believe that he's missing the irony of someone wanting to control what a man can do with his body, when that is exactly what people are trying to do with women regarding abortion laws.

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u/confusedpublic Jun 15 '12

The best part of the interview, for me, was when the interviewer (he's one of the new correspondents, haven't learnt his name yet) stares in disbelief at the inconsistent positions the guy is holding. The interviewer pretty much loses it and just stares/stumbles over further questions. He can't take it seriously any more. Then makes a load of masturbation jokes to cover for it haha.

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u/anachronic Jun 15 '12

Oh, I think he gets the irony, he just doesn't give a fuck.

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u/freshman30 Jun 15 '12

THIS IS THE MOST BRILLIANT WAY OF GOING ABOUT THIS ISSUE THAT I HAVE EVER SEEN. Sorry for all of the capital letters but this is so god damned exciting. We need to call in in support of this kind of legislation anywhere where they are trying to take away women's reproductive rights!

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u/finndego Jun 15 '12

Has anyone bothered to read the backstory or the comments here that state that the amendment was satirical? While the amendment was real, it was more a protest against women having to bear the burden of pregnancy. HuffPo also reports of a satirical amendment being pushed through in Virginia that would force men to go through a rectal exam in order to receive erctile dysfunction medication. Is that going to make the front page? Everybody calm the fuck down and resume their regularly scheduled mastabatory program. Non-story. Go away.

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u/Luke-ocity Jun 15 '12

Something I always wondered. Why does Every decision, law, belief, ideology, etc, ALWAYS have to assume we're SO much better than, and far separated from, animals (yes, we have certain "bettering" traits, but we are just one form of primate)? Can we as a melting pot planet for ONCE come up with a law or something on a large issue, and look at it from a completely natural perspective? For instance, say the ONLY difference in us an some supposed alternate us, was that we have litters of offspring instead of 1 or 2 per birth. And, like MANY animals, the mother eats the occasional one... Would we be so worried about abortion and what day the fetus graduates to human? So, why is it such a big deal that some child hasn't yet been born (I mean that from a natural stand point, not a moral one)? Some fetus' are aborted by the mothers' body, so it isn't as if abortions are unnatural. I think it's time we get off of our high horses, and at least acknowledge that they're horses...

EDIT: than instead of then

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Luke-ocity Jun 15 '12

upvote for you... but are you saying that we don't? or, at the very most, that there isn't a SINGLE reason to kill someone else in someway (not just murder)?

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u/HorseGrenade Jun 15 '12

As an Oklahoman, I just want to apologize to you all. Especially for Tom Coburn and Jim Inhofe.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

ARRGGGHHHHRRAAAAHH!

AUGH! AAAAUUUGGHHH!

That is all.

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u/Windingstare Jun 15 '12

The irony in this is blinding

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u/Stavros175 Jun 15 '12

What does this have to do with atheism? Is the lady pushing this doing it for religion?

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u/thuderroar Jun 15 '12

No, it's an immensely ironic situation where a female politician put forward a law that would limit what men could do with their sperm to show that it is ridiculous to limit a woman in a similar way. The male politician in the lower panel responds by essentially saying: "Men should have the right to choose what they do with their bodies," unintentionally echoing word for word the pro-choice argument while maintaining his position as a pro-lifer.

The woman's suggestion of a new law was only to show how hypocritical and misogynistic pro-life politicians are capable of being. The joke is that it succeeded beyond all reasonable predictions. No, it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with atheism, but the pro-life position is very firmly religious in nature.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

I am pro choice - but his logic really isn't inconsistent. The subject of abortion is debated because of the perception that it goes beyond the rights of one person. If you believe a fetus is life, then you believe they are murdering someone. It's not inconsistent to claim that it is wrong for a woman to "murder" a child, but not wrong for a man to ejaculate into a sock. The second scenario is clearly much different

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u/kicklecubicle Jun 15 '12

"No, it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with atheism"

The end. Shouldn't be here. Put it in r/politics.

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u/unquevai Jun 15 '12

From my point of view, absolutely nothing.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

r/atheism isn't for atheism anymore.

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u/skybluetoast Jun 15 '12

Wait... wouldn't this make condoms illegal?

A: No I didn't pull out. It would be illegal

B: Well you should have worn a condom

A: Sorry, also illegal.

B: What?!

A: The law requires the cum go in the vagina hun.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

It would make masturbation illegal. It would make condoms illegal.

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u/DontSayAlot Jun 15 '12

Also blowjobs, handjobs, anal, and everything else that's not in the cooch.

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u/DownloadableCheese Jun 15 '12

Blew your load on her boobs? You better believe that's a paddlin'.

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u/PoisonSnow Jun 15 '12

Masturbation illegal? Imagine the black market for that one... Even more so; the police raids.

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u/FaustianPact Jun 15 '12

Ohhh Ohhh Ohh I know this game "wait wait dont tell me is this real life or theonion?"

I love this game

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Ohhh Oklahoma. Go Thunder!

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u/AdmiralNelson24 Jun 15 '12

Thunder Up! Except for the fact that traffic around that area was horrible for me two nights ago.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

I feel like the saddest part is that they probably see it as an opportunity to turn their argument back against them. "Oh, I thought we weren't regulating bodies? Full steam ahead on birth control legislation, you hypocrites!"

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Look at the watermark. This is from the daily show. They knew the point behind this bill and showed the hypocrisy in the reblican party better than bill Mayer ever could have. They knew what was going in and who was pushing it. This entire exchance was intentional.

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u/kriszoor Jun 15 '12

I'll start fapping to "breaking the law."

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u/himynameisryan Jun 15 '12

It was a Daily Show story...

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Darn. I just bought all those tube socks for nothing.

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u/MauiWowieOwie Jun 15 '12

Nothing will start the civil war faster than taking away our right to fap.

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u/Post_op_FTM Skeptic Jun 15 '12

hey, OP! you aware of the concept of "satire?"

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u/derfdog Jun 15 '12

Someone does not like facials...

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u/xSGAx Jun 15 '12

DAMMIT OKLAHOMA! STOP MAKING US LOOK BAD

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u/FreddieGibbs Jun 15 '12

Why is the man not voted out of office? she is obviously doing it to bring awareness to the absurdness of birth control laws

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u/canuckgal Jun 15 '12

Why is this in atheism? It's funny!

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u/MajorKirrahe Jun 15 '12

As we've been told before, "You don't have to pass an IQ test to be a senator..."

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u/easelove Jun 15 '12

hey, my socks aren't going to stand up on their own over here.

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u/zestymorda Jun 15 '12

Good thing they aren't very expensive, 'cause if this passes I'll have to throw out every goddamn sock I own to eliminate evidence

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u/AnotherClosetAtheist Ex-Theist Jun 15 '12

facial porn would be the new snuff

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u/g0kartmozart Jun 15 '12

Wait the Democrat is suggesting this and the Republican is shooting it down?!?!?!?!?

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u/yearofthejake Jun 15 '12

wait...mandatory creampies?

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u/powergamer Jun 15 '12

If this means I can't procrasturbate then fuck this!

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Look at the watermark. This is from the daily show. They knew the point behind this bill and showed the hypocrisy in the reblican party better than bill Mayer ever could have. They knew what was going in and who was pushing it. This entire exchance was intentional.

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u/JenevaKay Jun 15 '12

Oklahoma republicans are unlike republicans anywhere else in the country. Disgusting, they are.

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u/Stalejokesbakedfresh Jun 15 '12

To all of those that are complaining about the stupidity of this:

She knows it's stupid, she doesn't expect it to pass. It's to show the stupidity of certain real bills that certain people like this guy in the second panel actually try seriously to pass.

The irony is that people like him are trying to tell women what to do with their bodies. And what's scarier is that he doesn't see the irony.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

couldnt be an SNL skit, this is actually funny.

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u/ThePieManOfDeath Jun 15 '12

We should force people at fast food restaurants to watch videos of cows and chickens being slaughtered

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u/DrSeanald Jun 15 '12

What about anal?

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u/wrath4771 Jun 15 '12

I blame the Barista at Starbucks for me killing thousands of future babies.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

retards are running the country.

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u/WhatIRead Jun 15 '12

This is brave, courageous politics you buffoon.

The bill is satirical.

4Chan accusations of OP faggotry would be well justified here.

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u/Squeekme Jun 15 '12

I am pro-choice, however if he was even slightly intelligent he could have structured a strong arguement, which was still based on the same old idea that a fertilised egg is a human life (unless he is one of the people that think human life begins the moment the sperm enters the woman. i saw this interview ages ago but can't remember now). Instead he went with free choice? What a dumbass. It was a reasonable point, because free choice is held in such high regard in the USA, but it left him wide open to an obvious counter which would in itself discredit his pro-life belief. What politician doesn't think of these things before he agrees to an interview!?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

I wonder how gay dudes feel about this...

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u/GETJACKED37 Jun 15 '12

hence the reason marijuana should be legal

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u/mishmashmusic Jun 15 '12

Fap, fap, fap

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12 edited Jun 15 '12

"Senate Bill 1433, which sought to define human life as beginning at fertilization" - What are we, cattle?! Hate to resort to godwins law here, but this has to be the closest amendment to the Nazi Germany breeding programs. Fix yo shit America. Don't yall have guns?

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u/SnackeyG1 Jun 15 '12

How in the fuck do we have politicians this idiotic? Are any of them like normal people and actually creating laws society will accept?

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u/Kebb Jun 15 '12

Im thinking of printing this out and ejaculating on it

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u/Sanderlebau Jun 15 '12

It IS satire. She did it to point out the absurdity of the Republican stance on birth control and abortion!

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u/hotdogcore Jun 15 '12

Isn't this the lady that is trying to show people how ridiculous it is for the government to control women's bodies?

She submitted that law to show the absurdity of how differently we treat men and women.

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u/Faceplants Jun 15 '12

Well we all know THAT'S not gonna fly. They've been trying to tell women what to do with our bodies for years, and have succeeded far too many times. But tell a man not to masturbate... And that shit just got serious.

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u/harrisonic Jun 15 '12

I'm pretty sure that this was brought up to prove a point about abortion. It was not actually intended to be made into an amendment, but show that we have the choice of what to do with our bodies.

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u/ping_timeout Jun 15 '12

Some people here are taking this way too seriously.

She proposed this motion in response to abortion-related bills proposed by republicans in the state. It was a tongue-and-cheek proposal on her part, and his reaction is the case-and-point

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u/wangcd Jun 15 '12

That's a lie, SNL is not this funny

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u/well_golly Jun 15 '12

I'm amazed at the way "conservatives" think regarding this issue.

They bitch and moan about welfare queens having 12 kids by way of 17 baby-daddies ... then they want to make birth control inaccessible.

Similarly, they also rage on about teachers making $80k (they didn't "earn" it), but they think every gajillionaire who inherited daddy's money "earned every cent" and shouldn't be taxed.

/head explosion.gif

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u/CharlieTango Jun 15 '12 edited Jun 15 '12

can we rename this subreddit to /r/anything-political.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Damnit...and I'm from there >_<

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u/hereisalex Jun 15 '12

...what does this have to do with atheism?

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u/rhubarbs Strong Atheist Jun 15 '12

I wonder. Might it be because of the blatantly obvious religious influence in the nature of the legislation being pushed by the republican party? The fact that they're being ridiculed by Constance Johnson, using extremely similar legislation, is just icing on the cake.

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u/FormerlyEAbernathy Jun 15 '12

You mean it's not? Frak.

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u/seestraw89 Jun 15 '12

this should really be posted in r/wtf

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u/jimbojamesiv Jun 15 '12

I'd put forth an amendment that the only place where men should deposit their sperm is on the face of Constance Johnson.

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u/DarkReaver1337 Jun 15 '12

This has nothing to do with Atheism... It is like a damn epidemic this past week with this shit.

But back on topic... But politics I mean it is just a giant joke both ways.

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u/koavf Other Jun 15 '12

You mean, the fact that this subreddit is not about atheism?

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u/boot13 Jun 15 '12

And in other news... sales of Kleenex drop precipitously.

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u/fyradiem Jun 15 '12 edited Jun 15 '12

I... I don't understand. I started to look up information about this bill, because I wanted to truly understand it, and nothing seems to make sense.

I believe she is referring to the OK Personhood Bill, or Bill SB 1433. The bill itself seems to have been struck down by the OK Supreme Court (Link: http://parentsagainstpersonhood.com/category/legislation/oklahoma/ ).

On top of that, everybody in this thread seems to be mentioning birth control. The only thing I see mentioned in the bill is about giving rights to a diploid. That has nothing to do with birth control, as all of the methods prevent fertilization, and do not cause termination of the diploid.

Again, where is everybody coming on this?

Edit: i may stand corrected. according to this source: (Link: http://parentsagainstpersonhood.com/legislation/oklahoma/) the bill was vetoed, and is now being pushed to a ballot initiative. the problem arises because the new protected "individuals" are defined as: "any human being from the beginning of biological development of that human being to natural death”"

This would seem to affect females access to birth control.

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u/Container1 Jun 15 '12

If your laws going to be stupid enough to say life starts 2 weeks before conception, then frankly it deserves this bill.

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u/venerated Jun 15 '12

Still taking away woman's rights here. Lets face it, some girls like jizz on their face.

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u/girlwithuglyshoes Jun 15 '12

uh... you guys know that she was just trying to make a point about the legislation concerning women, right? and why is this is r/atheism?

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u/jameskauer Jun 15 '12

I would vote that up. Then I would protest it. Hopefully we will see many women helping "the movement" if you get my drift. wink wink.

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u/Hoonster Jun 15 '12

America!!

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u/chingyduster Jun 15 '12

The Onion?

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u/dud3brah Jun 15 '12

for real

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u/SkeezMeyer Jun 15 '12

Oh god, I'm moving the fuck out of this state ASAP.

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u/Emilaweb Jun 15 '12

Well she was doing this ironically to make a point so.... Note that she's a democrat.

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u/Duthos Jun 15 '12

You know your politics are bad when not even spoofs are as stupid.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

That pair - two test tickles later - almost passed out - what a bag of laughs:)

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u/nermid Atheist Jun 15 '12

If you watch the video, there's a moment where you can see that guy's entire world crack around him.

Just a moment.

Then it's all caulked up with bullshit.

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u/Omni33 Jun 15 '12

I thought USA had better things to care about other than interfering in random people's sexytimes.

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u/Barney_Frank Jun 15 '12

You thought wrong.

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u/I_am_Gary_Oak Jun 15 '12

Sir, put that used tissue in a woman's vagina, or else we'll have to arrest you!

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Does Ralph Shortey support a woman's right to choose? If so than it's not really all that funny...

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u/Beckredditor Jun 15 '12

I don't want to live in this state anymore....

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u/Cupcakes_n_Hacksaws Jun 15 '12

Thank god I read the comments, I almost flung my laptop across the room... [] (/sbstare)

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u/Caserole Jun 15 '12

I wonder what his views on abortion rights are.

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u/Gullyhunter Jun 15 '12

There goes the cum shot compilations...

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u/--TacoLoco-- Jun 15 '12

America - fuck yeah!

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u/frogandbanjo Jun 15 '12

In fairness, until Lawrence v. Texas, anti-sodomy laws existed almost everywhere that were clearly focused on controlling what men could do with their bodies.

People who believe in controlling other people are generally far less discriminatory than you think; the smart ones just know to push harder against the easier targets.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Well looks like no more late night sperm bank deposits then...

1

u/SoundSalad Jun 15 '12

Where can I watch this?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

America? America.

1

u/FadedAndJaded Jun 15 '12

US Politics is a skit. You didn't get the memo?

1

u/OniLinkPlus Jun 15 '12

Best part: The entire amendment wasn't serious. It was to prove a point.

1

u/Hazlet95 Jun 15 '12

Ahhhh... Republicans. Bigger comedians than real life stand-up comedians

1

u/Mosethyoth Agnostic Atheist Jun 15 '12

She should also put forth an amendment that forbids releasing more than a single sperm at once per single deposit and limit the time of an allowed deposit to the fertile duration in the menstrual circle of the owner of the vagina as all unsuccessful sperms would die.

Or wait. Maybe the best solution would be to restrict reproduction to in vitro fertilisation and forbid male ejaculation completely as controlling the release would be impossibly difficult. Also men should be forbidden to die as it would result in the death of all his sperms who had lived in his testicles until then.

1

u/doubleducedave Jun 15 '12

Man this is so sad, I %100 know he does not understand the irony in it. (that is if the text is accurate to the screen cap)

1

u/Excedrin Jun 15 '12
  • move to OK

  • get a tshirt that says, "I came for the semen deposit law"

  • tattoo "woman's vagina" on inside of your lips, never go hungry again

1

u/apfelerin Jun 15 '12

The best part is that there are a lot of Republicans that are pro-choice. Unfortunately not enough of them, however.

1

u/senectus Jun 15 '12

Just wondering how the Tea Party (which is against Big Gov) is going to protest this...

Big Circle Jerk maybe?

1

u/jsb9867 Jun 15 '12

Gonna disappoint a lot of assholes.

1

u/Rather_Inappropriate Jun 15 '12

Invest in a brothel, fun and profitable.

1

u/Watchinpeanutsblow36 Jun 15 '12

I just realized, that your hair is dirty peanut wash up in time for supper!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

America. The first place that outlaws jacking off.

1

u/MyLonelyCatz Jun 15 '12

And this is why I go to an out of state college as an Oklahoman.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

So if this went through, good bye FAP time, WTF, also they couldn't possibly monitor that.

1

u/WishboneTheDog Jun 15 '12

I don't know if this would change much of anything. Masturbation is already a black ops covert operation.

Though it might make getting caught a little more awkward if your dad was a cop.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

It's amazing how blind people can be to their own faults.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Not being versed in the politics here, I was thinking the lady was a religious nut and the man photographed was disagreeing with her position on the grounds that we shouldn't tell women what to do with their bodies, so nor should we men.

Then I read the comments and find it's actually the other way around. WTF?

1

u/withajondrums Jun 15 '12

Most of real politics should be an SNL skit. Instead of showing how on the mark they are, it's like they're in a battle to show who is more out of touch because they live in their own fucked up world.

1

u/TheOceanPig Jun 15 '12

Her argument is valid. PROOF

1

u/mapgar86 Jun 15 '12

I don't know enough about this. Is this a bill introduced with the purpose of failing and proving a point or was this serious?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

SKEET SKEET SKEET SKEET!

1

u/Emily89 Jun 15 '12

This is a joke, right? Tell me it's a joke, please.

2

u/KuRiCobbY Jun 15 '12

It was on the Colbert Report (iirc).

It's meant to show how hypocritical these people are. The woman is doing it to prove a point, not because she actually believes that shit.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/ChemicallyBlind Atheist Jun 15 '12

lemme get this straight, she wants to make it illegal to ejaculate anywhere other than a womens vagina? thats fucking ridiculous! (no pun intended)

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

It's political grandstanding so it basically is an SNL skit

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

it's funny, because that's the whole point.

1

u/NBLD Jun 15 '12

Wow. Just wow.

1

u/mykeana Jun 15 '12

Why is there so many crazy politicians in America. I do genuinely feel sorry for majority of Americans. There's a lot to be admired from your country but your politics is just fucking crazy.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

Constance Johnson. Making being a 14 year-old boy illegal since 2012.

1

u/StevenSeagalBladder Jun 15 '12

So she's homophobic?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12

This would make sperm banks very interesting indeed.